10 Things You Need to Let Go of to Be Truly Happy
We all sometimes feel down, even though we don’t have any obvious reason. Research suggests that there are several reasons for depression and unhappiness, like a chemical imbalance, a stressful life event, genetic vulnerability, and medications we are taking. We can’t control some of these causes without professional help, but we can definitely control the level of stress in our lives. Sometimes we have to get rid of certain things in our environment in order to maintain our peace of mind.
Bright Side would like to introduce you a list of 10 things that could ruin your happiness on a daily basis.
1. Self-judgement and judgement of others
Being extremely judgmental toward yourself is a direct path to unhappiness. Roland Alexander, Ph.D., claims that negative self-judgement prevents us from reaching our full potential and it has enormous destructive power. Stop concentrating on your weaknesses, and develop your strengths.
At first, it seems like there is no connection between judging others and being happy. But there is a direct connection — judgement is a reflection of your inner world. By criticizing other people you create unnecessary negativity in your life. It is completely fine to disagree with something or someone, but you should remember that these people don’t have to get your approval to live their life.
2. Guilt, regrets, and the past
We all make mistakes, that’s just the way life is. But don’t let these mistakes get stuck in your head and influence your future. The only thing you can do is to learn from these mistakes and become a better person. If you think that you made someone feel bad, apologize and move on. Don’t let the guilt and regret from the past destroy your happiness.
3. Fear of the unknown
Being worried about something you are not familiar with is fine. But you should remember that good things happen when you get out of your comfort zone. If you’ve wanted to try something for a long time, but were afraid — just go ahead and give it a shot.
4. Thinking that the world is black and white
Thinking in extremes is also something that prevents you from being happy. Nothing looks the same from different people’s perspectives. No one is absolutely right or wrong, just accept it. Try to find the positive even when it seems that the world is falling apart.
Being jealous of someone’s success or happiness makes you unhappy. Don’t compare yourself to anyone, because your lives, backgrounds, and environments aren’t the same. The only person you should compare yourself to is the past you. Remember that if someone’s life seems to be perfect, it doesn’t mean that it really is.
Try to be happy for others and celebrate their success. Find inspiration in other people’s stories and learn from them.
The desire to control everything leads to an increased stress level. Life is pretty spontaneous and we can’t control everything. Delegate some of your responsibilities to other people, and try to relax.
The other thing you have to let go in order to be happy is controlling other people. Being a control freak can destroy relationships and friendships. There are several techniques that can help you to deal with this like distracting yourself, calming your anxieties, managing your emotions, and going to therapy.
Proving that you’re right to everyone is also a way of trying to control everything. What seems right to you, may seem wrong to someone else. Let go of the thought that you have to prove anything to other people. Just accept that we all have differences and people have the right to disagree with you.
7. Social media
Social media syndrome is the disease of 21st century. We wake up and the first thing we grab is a smartphone. We constantly think about likes, retweets, trending news, comments, photos, etc. This tends to overload our minds and distract us from what’s really important.
In order to stop social media anxiety and feel the happiness of the present moment you should remember several rules. Turn off your notifications from time to time, and limit the amount of time you spend on social media. Find yourself an offline hobby and spend more time with your friends and family.
Always striving to improve yourself is a great personal quality, but you shouldn't stress about attaining perfection. There is no perfect partner, perfect body, perfect job, or perfect life. Dream big and work hard for it, but don't be obsessed with the idea of a perfect life.
Sometimes social media can make anxiety even worse. You should remember that the seemingly perfect lives of people on social media are just the parts they want to share. In reality, everyone has their ups and downs.
9. Living up to expectations and social approval
Just like realizing that you don't have to be perfect, you also don't have to meet other people's expectations. Live your life the way you think is right for you. You can listen to what your parents or friends have to say, but you should make your own decisions. Stressing about social approval is something you should stop doing to be truly happy.
10. Toxic relationships
Sometimes it's hard to accept that you have to let go of certain relationships. People around you should bring joy and happiness to your life. If someone constantly makes you feel bad about yourself, or treats you the wrong way, it's a sign that this relationship is toxic. Try to limit communication with these people and concentrate on the ones who truly appreciate you.
Bonus: Accept that you are the only one who's responsible for the way your life is.
You are the only person who has full responsibility over your life. People can influence it, but at the end of the day it is you who makes the decisions. Don't try to shift the blame on someone else. Be smart and be your best self.
Do you feel happy? What prevents you from being 100% happy? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!