11 Myths We Start to Believe When We Get Back Together With Our Exes
Many of us attempt to return to relationships from our past. Of course, sometimes there are good reasons for returning to your ex. Yet in most cases, we soon understand that the reasons for reunification were nothing more than a myth.
Bright Side will explain why these 11 most common excuses we use in such situations are actually empty shells.
1. This time everything will be different.
The world’s changing, so it’ll be different...but probably worse. According to research, partners who reunite pay less attention to the positive aspects of their relationship, concentrating more on negatives. They rarely try to fix something and adore remembering past grievances.
2. He has completely changed.
People don’t change. At least not quickly and without reason. To stop even the most insignificant habit, one needs a strong and sincere desire, motivation, self-improvement, and time. Did your ex have it all?
3. No one knows me better than him.
You’re right. You spent a lot of time together. Yet the fact you know each other so well didn’t prevent the breakup, did it? Maybe this was the reason for your separation — there must always be some mystery in a relationship.
4. There are only idiots available, and I’m unlikely to find someone better.
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. You just don’t want to see this new guy’s good points because the new relationship would push you out of your comfort zone.
5. He isn’t perfect, but he’s mine.
The human brain is more sensitive to losses than to wins. It’s the same with a relationship. Yet ask yourself what’s better: to live happily ever after with your perfect match or lead a miserable life with a "not perfect, but mine" partner?
6. I don’t have time to date or go on dating sites.
Getting to know a new person is first and foremost an opportunity to broaden your horizons. About 17% of marriages in the USA over the past year were contracted by couples who found each other on dating sites.
7. We’re friends for now, and we’ll see how it goes.
8. You had a couple of drinks and kissed. You could go back home together.
43% of women and 47% of men sleep with their exes. If it happens to you, just remember that your case isn’t unique, and this isn’t a reason to start afresh. Just don’t let it turn into a habit because regular sex with an ex is a huge obstacle on your way to a bright future.
9. No one’s perfect.
No one’s perfect. Yet who wants perfect? You just need to feel great together and complement each other.
You broke up not because one of you was far from perfect. You just weren’t right for each other. Accept this, and move on.
10. My ex won’t leave me alone.
After a breakup, one of the partners may begin to suddenly show activity they didn’t demonstrate before. Calls, messages, comments on social networks, unexpected visits. “This is love,“ we think. ”They cannot forget me." Yet most often it’s a need for total control.
11. Maybe I’m exaggerating.
Maybe you are. If you broke up because of relatives, work, or other external reasons, a second try may be successful. Yet, unfortunately, most often the cause of a breakup is more serious: cheating, for example. And this is a real reason to end a relationship.
Illustrator Natalia Kulakova for BrightSide.me