7 Signs You Are Being Manipulated
We all manipulate other people to some extent. But it is completely different when somebody manipulates us.
Bright Side learned about different kinds of manipulation and how to avoid them.
7. Manipulators flatter a lot.
Flattery is a manipulator’s favorite weapon. If you are such a kind person, how can you refuse to help a poor guy in need? They use this tactic and get what they want from you. Be alert if somebody starts to say nice things to you all of a sudden.
6. Manipulators want you to feel guilty.
It is so easy to manipulate somebody who feels guilty. They are ready to help with anything. Be careful if you start feeling guilty toward somebody. Their small "favors" are most likely coming.
5. Manipulators push you to hasty emotional decisions.
All good manipulators know that fast emotional decisions are their bread and butter. If they don’t give you enough time to think about something, or if they force you to make a fast decision, they win. A simple phrase like "I need time," if said confidently, will most likely cool the manipulator’s interest down, and he or she won’t ask you again.
4. Passive manipulators pretend to be helpless and stupid. They always play the offended party.
You naturally want to help someone who seems to be a poor innocent girl. She is always unlucky and unhappy, and you want to hug her and give her shelter. This is exactly what she wants. Such "victims" can even act like this unconsciously, but it doesn’t make it less of a manipulation.
3. Manipulators remind you about your promises.
"You promised me" is a great phrase that will make you do whatever a manipulator tells you, even if you understand something is not right about it. Nobody wants to be the person who doesn’t keep their promises. Nobody wants to look this way. Your answer must always be very clear so that nobody can blackmail you later.
2. Manipulators always start a conversation at the worst time.
Manipulators love asking for help when you are very busy. This gives them a higher chance that you will agree just to get rid of them. They will apologize a lot, and they will tell you how sorry they are to ask you for help at this moment. Stay alert!
1. Manipulators refer to somebody else’s positive experience.
Another favorite move of every manipulator is the phrase "Don’t worry, I (my friend, my boss, a guy I know) have done this many times, and nothing bad happened." It doesn’t matter that the manipulator’s idea scares you. The most important thing is their success. Of course, it’s a lie! Don’t listen to such words. Ask for concrete proof.
How to avoid being manipulated
- Ignore a manipulator’s request. Pretend that you didn’t hear it or didn’t understand it correctly.
- Pay attention to the person’s appearance. Don’t listen to what they are saying, but watch how they are saying it. This move will make even the most experienced manipulator nervous.
- Change the subject.
- Confuse the manipulator. Pretend to agree but start asking them about the real point of the request without giving a clear answer.
- And the most important thing — don’t give a fast answer. Tell them that you need time to think. In most cases, the person won’t ask you again because the moment is gone.
Illustrated by Oleg Guta for BrightSide.me