Psychologists Reveal 10 Flirting Strategies That’ll Help Anyone Become Irresistible
Everyone who has ever ventured into the world of dating knows that it has a lot of hidden hazards. Attracting someone you like can also be challenging. However, if you take flirting as what it actually is – a natural strategy of propagation – everything will go differently.
Bright Side and the team from Psych2Go offer you the 10 best flirting strategies that actually work.
1. Eye contact
Eye contact that lasts for longer than usual can reveal a lot about mutual attraction. It can last about 4-5 seconds, but it will convey much more than a fleeting glance.
While communicating with a prospective mate, you can find physiological proof of their interest in you: dilated pupils. For the same reason, you can just look into someone’s eyes if you want to let them know you’re interested in them.
2. Wearing red
Bright red is always a way to carry a message, be it ripe strawberries, a road sign, or a necklace. Psychologist Adam Pazda suggests that it might have to do with natural instincts like those female baboons incite by demonstrating red patches on their buttocks to signal their readiness to mate.
With his colleagues from the University of Rochester, he conducted an experiment by showing men pictures of women in red and white. Many of the participants thought that the ladies in red would be more open to romance. The results of an analogous experiment with women were similar: men in red shirts and sweaters looked more confident and attractive in their eyes.
Professor Geoffrey Miller, a psychologist from the University of New Mexico, is sure that humor is one of the key ways to help us decide if we like a person. The ability to be funny suggests quick thinking and creativeness, which always come in handy in all aspects of life. Don’t be surprised if a witty joke helps you to arrange a date more quickly than traditional attempts to win someone’s heart.
4. Playing hard to get
Classic but true: research shows that we like a person more when we’re not sure if they like us back as opposed to when they directly say, "I like you." Granted, individuals vary, and you shouldn't play hard to get if you already know that the feelings are mutual.
5. Women: smile
A smile is not just a sign of friendliness and a sense of humor; it also shows that a woman can be a good mother and displays her good health. A study from the University of British Columbia found that men are attracted to smiling women much more than to prideful ones. According to the researchers, it might be because smiling is associated with maternal urges and submission.
6. Men: play bad
Another research project by the University of British Columbia found that women regard smiling men as less attractive compared to prideful, brooding, or shameful men. This means that acting like a "bad boy" could help you win a partner, even if you aren't really a "bad boy."
55% of attraction communication is through body language.
We have reached one of the most subtle and effective flirting techniques: mirroring body language. People subconsciously copy those to whom they are attracted. If you mirror someone, they will see that you really care about their feelings and thoughts in addition to having good communicative skills.
Mirroring is also a reliable way to find out if someone is interested in you. If you notice them copying your mirroring, it often means that your feelings are mutual.
8. Varying pitch and tone
How you talk is much more important in flirting than you might think. A study from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology found that men are more attracted to women who vary the tone of their voice. On the contrary, more monotonous ladies received less romantic interest.
The research also showed that women preferred men who used words like "yep," "okay," and "I see" when speaking. These suggest understanding and dominance, which is a naturally appealing trait in men.
Confidence is the key to success. A study by Dr. Monica Moore of Webster University in St. Louis, in which people in bars and shopping malls were observed, found that it wasn’t the most physically attractive people who were the most successful when flirting. Instead, those who employed basic flirting strategies such as smiling and acting in a confident and relaxed way received the most attention.
Here’s the last secret: just touch them! Tactile contact is important. Research conducted by psychologists in a nightclub showed that young women were more likely to accept an invitation to dance if a man touched their forearm for 1-2 seconds. According to a later survey, these men looked more confident and dominant, which turned out to be advantageous.
Have you ever tried any of these tips? Do you have your own secret flirting techniques? Share them with us in the comments!