Six secrets for being a true lady
’Idiot! Are you blind?!’ This is the most common reaction of a woman who’s just been drenched in mud by a passing car. Even if the driver slows down to say, ’I’m sorry!’ she’d probably fail to hear it.Now, a truly elegant woman wouldn’t utter a single word; she’d just give the driver a surprised look. Then she’d head home to get changed, having first accepted sincere apologies from the amazed motorist. And after that she’d resume her day, conscious of the need to revise her initial plans but not feeling excessively sorry about it.
It’s hard to define elegance. And yet its presence is always unmistakable. It’s in the way a woman walks, in the way she talks. You can see it in a woman’s bearing. In the way she moves her wrists. In the lightness of her smile. In a myriad of other details that can leave any passing man spellbound.
Elegance has been the subject of many articles, movies, and training programs. But it still resists characterization. It is not something that needs to be measured and labeled. It is to be felt and exuded.
Miss Elegance is always aware of how she looks
When people look at you, what do they see? A woman caught in the flow, hurrying on some pressing business? Someone charging ahead with her hands in constant motion and her body leaning forward aggressively? Waiting for a subway train with such a gloomy expression, one might think she’s in training for a frowning championship. How did it happen? When did this unattractive image become the norm for you? The simple answer is that when we don’t work at maintaining a nice facial expression, it naturally slides towards downright gloominess.
An elegant woman is always in control of how she looks. This doesn’t mean you should be forcing yourself to smile all the time. Rather, attractiveness must become your second nature. Among other things, this includes staying charming and radiant even when you’re on your own. Remember, this is not just about looking good to other people, it’s about actually enjoying your own company.
Learn to love yourself
’An elegant woman should be able to do her marketing without making housewives laugh. Those who laugh are always right...’
A true woman knows how to relax and slow down. She enjoys listening to the sound of silence. She would rather watch the clouds than stare at her smartphone screen.
Whatever she does, she never pushes herself to the edge of utter exhaustion.
There’s no point in working yourself to death for the sake of succeeding at work or making your loved ones happy — this road leads to nowhere! On the other hand, when you’re feeling relaxed and at peace with the world you’ve got a much better chance of fulfilling yourself at home and at work. Make sure to always replenish your internal ’batteries’ to stay radiant and bring light to the lives of others.
Being elegant means being impossible to throw off balance
Miss Elegance jokes in the face of adversity. She never takes offense at the world and doesn’t regard life’s less enjoyable surprises as a personal insult. Nothing can be more stupid than to think that fate is out to get you! Every person in the world receives his or her own daily dose of reasons to feel self-pity. It’s up to us whether to make full use of every such opportunity, or to spare our nerves by remaining unperturbed. To be elegant, a woman must learn to place her spiritual well-being above all else.
Just as importantly, a truly elegant woman never feels the need to gossip about the misfortunes of others. She doesn’t suffer from low self-esteem. For instance, you’d never catch her gloating over how aged her former classmates look on their social network photos!
Learn to accept adoring glances
A woman of style is always at the center of attention. She knows how to accept compliments and admiring stares. She neither shies away from popularity, nor gets blinded by it. She knows her worth.
When a colleague praises the way she looks, she doesn’t reply with: ’C’mon, this blouse is really old!’ She simply takes it for granted, thanking him in return.
A true woman is comfortable with her body
If you still think that an elegant woman must possess a waspish waist and chiseled hips, then it’s high time to laugh at this stereotype and forget about it! There are plenty examples of how charming soft-bodied, tender, chubby ladies can be — provided they can highlight their winning sides. To look attractive, such a woman doesn’t need to wear tight jeans or dresses that are two sizes too small. Rather, her clothes must be in harmony with her body. Chubbiness is beautiful when not constrained by the demands of modern fashion.
Elegance is never a slave to rules and conventions
The last secret for being a true lady is to always be attuned to the situation at hand. There’s no need to wear a tight-fitting jacket to a picnic. Nor do you have to put on high heels for a stroll or sweat it out in a strict suit on a hot summer day.
Don’t believe those who call perfectionism and classicality the keys to success and see wearing loose hair as a crime against good looks.
Listen to your intuition. If you feel that your hair looks great in its natural state — go loose-haired. Uncomfortable high heels can always be abandoned in favor of nice flats or slip-ons. And, whatever you do, don’t imprison your individuality inside some meticulous black and white classical dress!
Mariah Korotkaya, especially for Bright Side
Preview photo credit Lakeshore Entertainment