10 Signs You Are Demisexual and What It Means for You
The term demisexual has appeared relatively recently in 2006. It falls somewhere between sexuality and asexuality and refers to a state of mind and sexuality when a person is not ready to develop an intimate relationship until they create an emotional bond with their potential partner.
Bright Side has carefully studied this new idea of sexuality and outlined 10 signs that can indicate you could be demisexual.
1. You prefer to create a strong friendship before diving into a relationship.
There are people who are ready to start a love affair right away and those who prefer to create a strong friendship bond first. If you consider yourself to be a part of the second group, it might be a true sign of your demisexuality. You simply believe it’s more important to become good friends before anything else.
2. You don’t get excited right away when thinking about physical relationships.
Again, there are 2 types of people: those who get excited when thinking about starting a physical relationship with a handsome guy or a pretty girl, and those who perceive being intimate as a physical reflection of strong emotions that already exist between 2 people. If your thoughts are closer to the second group and you believe that a physical connection is a continuation of an emotional one, you can start calling yourself demisexual.
3. You appreciate a good and meaningful conversation.
Having a meaningful and deep conversation turns you on more than anything else. You’re the one who always seeks depth in your partner’s words since it helps you build an even stronger connection with them.
4. You’re a fan of warm cuddles and hugs.
Love isn’t only about physical intercourse, it includes hugs, kisses, and warm cuddles. If you love the idea of establishing a relationship with cuddles rather than from having sex, and if “sleeping together” doesn’t only mean the act of intimacy for you, give yourself one more point for being demisexual.
5. You find the idea of a one-night stand offensive.
If you simply don’t understand the appeal of having a physical connection without any emotional bond and if the idea of satisfying a person’s primal needs and forgetting about what happened without a pinch of regret makes you feel weird, you’re likely demisexual.
6. You value a good personality more than good looks.
You’re not the kind of person who’s left in awe when you see an attractive person. You always wait until you find out what people’s personalities are all about before starting to set up a connection with them. If you find nothing beautiful inside a person, you’ll have no desire to pursue anything further with them.
7. You always take “liking someone” seriously.
If you’re into someone, it’s never a small thing for you. This is because there’s a lot that goes behind your good attitude toward a person, and you know it well. You’re well aware of the depths of the feelings you’ve developed and you can’t ever let a thing like that go too easily.
8. You’re not afraid to make a commitment.
Having a relationship means commitment, both from you and your partner’s side. And if you started that relationship, you’re ready to give them everything you have and more. You never attempt to sneak away from a relationship or break your promises.
9. Your friends often misunderstand how you feel.
This usually occurs when it comes to sharing your views about a relationship. If your friends don’t get your approach to keeping a strong relationship and you don’t understand how they can easily get caught up, you can assume you’re a demisexual person.
10. You’re not into flirting.
You’re not one who likes to go out in the evening and party at a bar, searching for a potential partner. You’re simply not into that kind of thing! Your approach to relationships is totally different and flirting is not a part of it.
So what does this all mean for you? Being demisexual is neither good nor bad, it’s simply a state of mind where emotions take over sexuality and it’s actually beautiful. Accept yourself the way you are and enjoy your way of developing relationships if you’re demisexual, and be happy about your personality if you’re not. No matter what, the way you love makes you unique.
How many signs described in the article could you relate to? Do you consider yourself to be demisexual? We’d be glad to hear from you in the comments!
Illustrated by Polina Chernevina for BrightSide.me