An Expert Reveals That Being “Boring” Is the Key to a Long and Happy Relationship
New relationships are an exciting combination of passion and fun that drive your hormones crazy and fill both partners with energy. But time goes by and people get comfortable with each other, so the idea of binge-watching Netflix on a Friday night doesn’t seem so boring anymore. Partners often think that it means that their relationship has lost its spark, but an expert actually believes that this may be an indicator of a happy relationship that is meant to last.
We at Bright Side wanted to highlight the fact that there’s no universal advice that works for every couple and we are ready to shed some light on this intriguing opinion to prove that “boring” couples might be the happiest.
“Boring” is the foundation of a strong relationship.
Self-help author Mark Manson believes that one of the most important features of a strong relationship is the ability of the partners to be boring together. He is sure that couples who have been together for 60 years or more were able to save their relationship, not because of all the crazy adventures they had, but because they know how to do boring stuff together and still enjoy each other’s company.
Boring couples love doing everyday things together.
In a long-term relationship, when the passion wears off a bit and the excitement fades, partners should still be able to do mundane things together and not want to kill each other. Going grocery shopping, chilling at home on the weekends, and cooking dinner should be another form of a pleasant activity and shouldn’t cause irritation. Long-lasting relationships aren’t based on drama or crazy emotions, but on support and an ability to share your life with another person.
They’ve learned to ignore the standards imposed by social media.
Mark also believes that social media contributes to a common misconception that successful couples should have all this excitement in their life. People start to compare their lives with the photos of friends and celebrities and they fear they’re missing out and feel like interesting things happen to everyone but them. This approach puts additional pressure on the partners and makes them doubt their feelings. But it’s important to realize that boredom is a normal part of life and definitely not something we should be ashamed of.
But it doesn’t mean you have to become a boring person.
However, turning into a boring person without any interests, except for chilling at home, isn’t an option. Finding a healthy balance between your own interests and your life with a partner is a must. Manson believes that we can be an exciting person to hang out with and be a horrible romantic partner at the same time. So keep growing, but don’t put too much pressure on your relationship by trying to make it constantly exciting, while forgetting about the comfort.
Do you agree that we should embrace boredom more in our relationships? What is your key to staying a happy couple? Share your personal experience in the comments.