8 Things You Should Never Ever Tell Your Phone
All Apple users know Siri — an automated personal assistant, always ready to help her owner with any question. Yet sometimes her responses can do more harm than good.
Bright Side compiled a list of 8 things you’d better avoid asking Siri about. And don’t miss the bonus at the end.
8. Don’t tell Siri to call your boyfriend.
Really, don’t. Especially if you’re not alone in the room. The thing is, Siri can create relationships by adding tags to your contacts. So, for example, if you ask her to call Dad, she will gladly do it.
So what’s the trick with boyfriends? Pretty simple: Siri can create tags but cannot remove them. Now imagine that she has a list of all your exes. Oops!
7. Don’t tell her you need to hide a body.
Yes, her answers may be funny (and they are), but you’d better google funny questions to Siri to satisfy your interest. Big Brother is watching you, and all searches for DIY drugs or explosives may attract the attention of security services. They won’t come for you right away, but they will definitely note your interest.
Do you really need this kind of problem?
6. Don’t ask her to call an ambulance.
You probably know that Siri can be overly literal sometimes. If you say something like, “Call me an ambulance,“ she may understand it as a new funny nickname. You’d better call it yourself and not trust your life to your assistant.
But if there’s no other way out, be as precise as possible when it comes to wording. Tell her, ”Siri, call an ambulance." Or, better yet, just say the emergency number she has to call.
5. Don’t search for unknown animals or plants.
If you’re lucky enough (and not in Australia), most of these monsters probably live far away from you, and you’ll never meet them.
Asking Siri to identify plants may be dangerous: the internet is full of unreliable sources. It’s better to read some relevant books beforehand. Search for the plants you can meet in the particular area you’re going to, and stay safe.
4. Never tell her to show you skin and home parasites.
A man’s home is his castle, and you probably feel safe there. All those comfortable couches and pillows...it’s so awesome to lie there after a long working day...
Our immune system takes care of us, so we don’t need to think about all the horrible stuff around us. And it’s even closer than you can imagine. Just follow hygiene rules and do regular cleaning. And never ask Siri to find this information for you.
3. Don’t try to find out if Jon Snow is alive.
Our faithful Siri turned out to be as secretive as Mr. Martin — so unfair! Or maybe she’s no less confused and interested than we are?
Anyway, all Siri can give are funny yet vague phrases: she provides us with some quotes about death from the TV series, hopes someone takes care of Jon Snow’s dog...and even invites the poor guy to try restarting.
2. Don’t ask her medical questions.
Siri can answer almost any of your questions. But when it comes to health, it’s better to rely on a professional. It can be both ineffective and dangerous to start self-treatment as different diseases can have a bunch of similar symptoms.
1. And finally, never ever ask her about September 11.
The Canadian police asked people to never search for information about September 11 using Siri. And it’s not because she reveals secret information. The thing is, Siri understands this as a request to call 911 and connects you to the nearest police department in 5 seconds.
Actually, the same applies to 108 — a famous internet prank. It’s not funny, guys. You may be punished for misleading the police. And it may cost someone their life.
Now it’s time for a funny bonus.
Of course, we shouldn’t forget that Siri has a good sense of humor with a great deal of sarcasm. So if you were at a cool party last night, don’t ask Siri to find you a cure for a hangover. She’s a little bitchy when it comes to alcohol.
Know what she says? She offers you a list of the nearest liquor stores. How cruel is this, Siri?! Feeling a little sick now...