My Husband Pretends to Be Perfect Trying to Convince Me Not to Divorce Him

We all have our fair share of arguments from time to time. It’s a normal part of any relationship journey. Sometimes, though, those disagreements become more than just a bump in the road. Our reader’s husband wants to convince her not to divorce him, but she’s trying to stand her ground, and it’s not easy.

One of our readers dropped us a message.

Thank you for sharing your story with us! We’re sorry to hear about what you’re going through. We hope these tips will be helpful for you.

Get a divorce anyway.

No matter how much he insists, if you don’t feel comfortable or safe in a relationship, you should end it. It’s possible that the changes are temporary and may only scratch the surface if there are hidden issues. You deserve to be in a relationship where you feel respected, valued, and supported.

Give him a second chance.

If you think your husband has changed and wants to make things right, you might decide to give him another chance. Before you do, make sure if he’s really making an effort to be better and fix the things that bothered you before.

Make sure it’s not just a temporary thing. Tell him what you need from the relationship and what’s not okay anymore. Make sure you both agree on how to move forward.

Don’t let others decide for you.

It’s okay to turn to friends and family for advice during difficult times, but the decision to divorce is deeply personal and should ultimately be yours. While your friends and family may offer well-intentioned advice based on their own experiences or perspectives, they may not see the whole picture of your relationship.

Get professional advice.

If you’re feeling unsure and have conflicting emotions, talking to a psychologist can be really helpful. They can offer a different perspective without any bias and help you sort through your thoughts. It’s like having a trusted advisor who’s there just for you. You’ll get the chance to untangle your feelings, figure out what you really want, and make decisions that are best for you.

The honeymoon phase is usually all about fun and excitement. However, for our reader, it didn’t kick off that way. Her husband used her points to get an upgrade and left her in economy class. It made her seriously reconsider their relationship.

Preview photo credit Alex Suprun / Unsplash

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Maybe ask him to go to couples and individual therapy? There's a reason why she married him (presumably). Maybe asking for divorce was a wakeup call to him, and he's realised how much he was taking for granted, and sincerely loves her and values their marriage. She clearly no longer trusts him, but with counselling, maybe that trust can be rebuilt, if he maintains his transformation.

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