Rebecca, 30, has recently written a letter to our editorial and shared her concerns about her younger sister, whom she wants to stick to a family agreement that both sisters have. She thinks that her sister must pay for Rebecca’s kids’ babysitter if she is no longer willing to look after them herself. The woman complained that her sister refused to do so, and she’s furious because of Rebecca’s claims. Here’re the details of the complicated situation between the sisters.
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Rebecca, a 30-year-old woman, has recently shared her scandalous family story with us. The woman complained about her younger sister, Anna, who’s 20 years old and who’s a university student at the moment.
The woman wrote, “I let my sister Anna live with us while she attends the university. In return, we agreed that she must pay us $500 a month. The sum of $500 covers her room, the utility bills, and her food. I believe it’s very fair. She also does some domestic chores and helps us with our 2 kids. That was our initial agreement. We even wrote everything down on paper, so there was no further confusion.”
Rebecca explained, “My understanding is that room and board at Anna’s school is around $1,200 a month for shared accommodation. And it is only available during the 8 months of school. So living here costs her $6,000 a year as opposed to $9,600 for 8 months and then 4 months living with our mom and stepdad. This agreement worked well for two years. She is a perfect student and a good kid.”
Rebecca goes on with her story, saying, “Recently, Anna and I had a huge conflict, where I think she’s totally in a wrong, but our parents judge me hard for my opinions. The thing is that Anna now has a boyfriend and their relationship is quite serious.
Of course, Anna wants to go out more and to spend more time with her boyfriend, I can totally understand it. But together with this, my sister has started complaining about watching the kids every other Saturday night so my husband and I can have a date night. This provoked a huge misunderstanding between us.”
Rebecca explained, “As far as we have this agreement and her university studies aren’t over yet, I insisted that Anna must stick to it. I also suggested to her that I could find a babysitter, but that would mean she’ll be responsible for paying them, since she was initially supposed to watch the kids. Now Anna is mad at me, and she is complaining that with her paying the babysitter, it is using up all of her income.”
Rebecca is wrong to make Anna pay for a sitter. She said that their agreement was for Anna to "help them out" with their children, NOT give up her OWN life so that Rebecca and her hubby could have a date night twice a month. That's a lot of nerve!
Why should SHE get a date night when those are HER children? Anna doesn't have any children. If anything, they could each have a date night once a month, and take turns watching the children. After all, if anyone has to give up something, it should be Rebecca, since those are HER children. Glad that Anna is moving out, and taking her life back!
It was the original agreement which was on paper. Every other Saturday is not to much to give up.
The woman wrote, “Anna was mad at me because of my suggestion, and she obviously thought I was using her. She fumed and said she would stay on her university campus next year. I said it was no problem for me, and I also told her that was a really great idea. This way she would get her freedom and I will get my hobby room back.”
Rebecca complained, “I faced a wave of criticism from all members of my family. My parents called me and said that my sister wasn’t my unpaid nanny. They insisted that we are sisters, and we must help each other for free. My mother said that I must let Anna leave in our house now for free, and I shouldn’t lay my claims on her finance.
I told them that we had an agreement and that Anna was satisfied with everything, but they wouldn’t listen. I also informed my parents that I had already agreed that she could live on campus next semester, and this was the moment when my mom went furious and said she would cut ties with me.”
Rebecca added, “I came home yesterday and found Anna packing her things. She didn’t even tell me where she was going to live, she preferred to keep it a secret. Then she said I was being a bad and mean person because that would increase the amount they are paying for her, and that four months away from her job and boyfriend was cruel. I’m kind of torn. We had a deal and I think it was fair.”
Many thanks Rebecca for sharing your story with us and for your trust.
We’d advise you to try and find a more neutral solution for your problem. You could not make Anna pay the whole sum for a babysitter, but a half of it, and cover the half yourself. Or, you may sit and talk to her about some kind of schedule, which would mean taking turns in looking after the kids, so that both your and your sister’s private life don’t get sacrificed too much.
Anyway, we think that talking to Anna and establishing some win-win decision is possible, and we wish you to find the way out without further tension in your nice family.
And here’s yet another family story that turned from a small incident into a big storm. A woman had to kick her pregnant daughter together with her 6 kids out of the house, and her decision was tough but justified. Read more to find out what provoked woman for such a step.
