Children and Their Parents Revealed What It Feels Like to Live in a Large Family

A sociologist from the University of Maryland, Steve Martin, found out that almost every 3rd woman between the ages of 35 to 45 has 2, or sometimes even 3, children. There used to be an opinion that only housewives have big families, but that situation is changing. Martin discovered that almost all women over 30 with a higher education and career have at least 2-3 children.

Bright Side authors wondered what it feels like to live in a large family and decided to have a look at this situation from both the parents’ and the children’s perspectives.

• I’m the 14th of 17 children in our family. We grew up very poor, but living on a dairy farm, we were never lacking food. A good holiday meant getting some socks, underwear, a treat like an orange, and sometimes even a toy. We were happy to get a cake for our birthday (our parents never gave us any birthday presents). But we always had somebody to play with. We used to play basketball, Monopoly, and other board games. And there was always someone old enough to drive so we could get to school without taking a bus or get to sports practice and other school events. © Joe Homan / quora

• There are 4 children in our family: 2 girls and 2 boys. If you remember Kevin’s face from “Home Alone” when he realized he had been left behind, this is us when all our kids leave for school in the morning. And when our kids went to school for the first time, my husband happily ran through the house with his pants down saying every cuss word he could think of. © Cristen Musch / quora

• I’m the oldest sister in a family with 6 kids. The age difference between me and my youngest sister is 22 years. For me, growing up in a large family means a lack of personal space, being held responsible for everything, and a constant feeling of guilt. I had to raise my brother who was born when I was only 14 years old. He called me “my nanny-mother” instead of my name. When I turned 18, I got married to escape. I have 2 children of my own who are the same age as my youngest sisters. As a grown-up, I don’t hate children. I love my siblings and I’m happy to spend time with them. But I’m not ready to have more than 2 children of my own. I also live 621 miles away from my parents so I see them only a couple of times a year and only call them once a month. © Urbano / pikabu

• I have 3 children and it feels like a constant juggling. At some point, you simply drop one of the “balls” and don’t know where it is. My children have an age difference of 3-4 years. One goes to middle school, and the others are in elementary school. These schools are located at different ends of the city. So every morning I struggle trying to drop everyone at school on time. © finnerpeace / pikabu

• There are 7 children in our family. My parents are very caring people, but they believe in traditional upbringing methods, where the oldest male sibling is the right hand of the father and the oldest daughter almost replaces the mother. I’m a girl, so I had to be the main helper around the house and a babysitter for my younger siblings. I never went for a walk alone because at least one of my siblings, or usually all of them, were with me. Besides, I had to cook, clean, and help my brothers and sisters with their homework pretty often. And the worst thing was being held responsible for basically everything. For example, if my brother didn’t clean his room while my parents were at work, it was my fault. I guess what I’m trying to say is that many of my girlfriends already have children and I don’t. And I keep on saying to them: “Please, don’t deprive your child of their childhood.” © VysAS / pikabu

• When I gave birth to my third child, I’ve learned to let go of a lot of things. For example, I love to live in a very clean house. But I’ve been too overwhelmed and frustrated lately, so I don’t have any energy to clean. And the only thing I can do for myself in this situation is to get into a hot bath. When my kids become too noisy, I just go to my backyard and take a deep breath. © unknown author / reddit

• I have 3 kids. For the first one, if her food fell on the floor, we threw it away. For the second one, if his food fell on the floor, we washed it carefully, and gave it back to him. For the third one, we just let him eat his food off the floor. © Andrew Weill / quora

• I have 3 older brothers, 2 younger brothers, and a younger sister, and there is never enough food and personal space. We have 7 kids in a 5-bedroom house. We have one TV and one Xbox and they’re almost always occupied. The house and the car are almost always dirty. It’s always loud in the house, because somebody is always crying, screaming, or having a fight. Nighttime is the only quiet time. But there are positives too. For example, you never get bored. Someone is also always willing to listen to your problems and give you some advice. And with so many people around, it’s nearly impossible to get into trouble, because you know that with 3 older brothers you won’t be bothered. © Lu Bryant / quora

• There’s a problem of another kind in our family. I call my wife “mom” when the kids are around. We have 3 kids, and they are always around. But when their grandmothers come to visit, I call them “mom” too. This is very weird because we have 3 women in our house who respond to “mom.” © Matthew Bates / quora

• I have 3 children and there is a huge difference between the 2nd and the 3rd child. We had seriously underestimated the number of problems we would have to face because of our 3rd child, before we decided to have him. It was a crazy decision. I love and hate my kids at the same time, especially when I want to have some quiet time and they won’t let me relax. © SuchAGoodTalker / reddit

• My family consists of 8 people. I noticed that in families like this, there is much less of a bond between the parents and the children. It’s especially noticeable when you see other children hanging out with their parents. In our family, it’s more of a priority to keep order, than to be a friend. In contrast to the lack of relationship between my parents and I, my siblings and I are very closely knit. I can tell them anything and ask their advice as if they were my closest friends. © Mark Krudy / quora

• My twins were 4 years old when I found out I was pregnant again. I cried because things were just starting to get fun with the older kids and I knew I’d have to give that up. Now my youngest is 4 and the older kids are 8 and things are getting fun again. I definitely enjoy my kids more as they get older because I feel happier. I suspect many moms feel the same way, but aren’t willing to admit it. © woahzelda / reddit

• I have 3 brothers, 4 sisters, a brother-in-law, and twin nieces. Since I am the youngest girl in the family, a large percentage of my clothes are hand-me-downs. I don’t really care because these clothes actually tend to be more comfortable. I used to mistake my older sisters for my mom. And none of my siblings got any financial help from our parents toward college, because they just didn’t have enough money. © Haley Marcum / quora

• I’m the second oldest of 9 children. For me, growing up in a big family was so much fun. We always invented silly little games that we could play together for hours and never get bored of. As I grew up and reached my teenage years, it got a little irritating. It was always noisy in the house, people were everywhere, and sometimes I wasn’t even able to sleep. I also never got the privilege of having a room to myself. We were by no means poor, but my parents never had any money left for extravagance. I remember that I ate lunches I brought from home, while all the other kids at school would have “fancy” things that they bought at a shop. © unknown author / quora

• I’m the youngest of 12 children. When I was 7, I learned to mend my socks because everything I wore was already used by my brothers. Our birthday present was the privilege of choosing dinner on that day. Any complaints about the food or the house would result in a long lecture on what a difficult life my parents had. © Eiichi Kitagawa / quora

Did you grow up in a large family or in a small one? Share the photos of your relatives so we can appreciate them together with some likes.