15+ Parents Who Know Firsthand That Children Are Not a Beautiful Picture but Hard Work

Parenthood is probably the hardest job in the world, which you have to do 24/7 for many years. But some people think that there is nothing difficult about being a mother or a father: cook food, take a walk with the kid in the park, play some games with them, and read a bedtime story. But the reality is quite different, and when a family welcomes a child, their whole life turns upside down.

• I'm a single father. My daughter asked my once, "Where do babies come from?" I don't like to lie to my daughter, so I found a book for children on the subject. We sat down and went over it in detail.
  In the first grade, a boy told her that children are found in cabbage. But my daughter disagreed and told him everything she knew. The following day, the parents of this boy called me, saying, "How come your 7-year-old is aware of these things? It's not right."
  They started threatening me that they would call child protective services and file a police report. And I replied that I would post the recording of our conversation in the parents' group. I also notified the class teacher to prevent any provocation. She supported me. It's good that at least teachers are capable of critical thinking. © Overheard / VK

• I met my future wife. After living together, I realized that she was the one. I proposed to her. Before starting wedding arrangements, we discussed our life together in detail: family, career, money and even our actions in case of divorce. To give birth, my wife had to go through 9 circles of hell: miscarriage, depression, diagnoses of "infertility," endless doctors, pregnancy, endless stress, difficult childbirth.
  We were lucky and had a wonderful, healthy baby. I held my wife's hand when she gave birth. In the first days, our hearts sank with the baby's every sneeze. My wife had postpartum depression. Sleepless nights, breast refusal, hospital, fear.
  Did we ever regret that we got into all this? No! Do I want more children? I do! Would I ask my wife to go through all this again? Never! © BLAHAJ / Pikabu
• My wife wanted a second child. I was against it. I'm the only one who works. I want to take the family on holiday, buy a new car. So, she secretly stopped taking pills and one day happily informed me that she was pregnant.
  But her words became the last straw, "When the baby is born, you'll change your mind and become a happy dad." I just walked away and filed for divorce. I will never set foot in the house where my opinion means nothing. © Overheard / Ideer

• My distant relatives have a daughter who, as a child, could go 2 or 3 days without eating if her parents refused to fulfil some of her whims. The parents didn't try to compromise and just waited until the girl was hungry enough to eat a bowl of soup. But since they continued to spoil the girl and indulged some of her whims, the same thing happened again, again, and again. Eventually this passed, but she developed new, sophisticated manipulation techniques, such as running away. © Singing Coon / ADME
• I raise a teenage daughter by myself, she's 14 years old. But she can't understand how to spend money properly. I give her pocket money, and we agree what things she can buy on it. For example, a T-shirt without flashy pictures, so that she can wear it to school.
  But now she wants to stand out: she demands manicure, eyebrow correction, expensive makeup because all the girls in the class have them. I don't have extra money for these things. And my daughter throws tantrums when I get manicures! But I'm almost 40 years old, I'm a grown woman, I earn money and I decide how to spend my money.
  Several times I left her money for groceries, and she bought just a little bit, but got a manicure. I gave her money for new shoes, as she had outgrown her old ones, and let her choose them herself. And she spent it on a manicure, but not just a regular manicure! Crazy design, long nails, terrible!
  Naturally, I told her that she wouldn't get new shoes, that those shoes were on her nails now. She cried, threw a tantrum. Our daddy pays minimal child support. And I count every penny, but my daughter doesn't care. Talking to her doesn't help. © Overheard / Ideer

• My husband leaves for work early in the morning, so I stay with the kids all day. I recently had food poisoning and had to run to the toilet almost every 5 minutes. With 2 small children (2 and 3 years old), this is a real problem! When I had to run again, I grabbed a bunch of toys, spilled them out in front of the kids and ran.
  30 seconds of silence, and I heard ringing and rattling. My heart sank into my boots. I ran out, and there sat 2 pranksters, holding the curtain...along with the curtain rod. I can't understand how some mums manage to do makeup and other things. And my husband gets offended that as soon as he returns from work, I immediately ask him to spend at least 15 minutes with the children.
• A friend of mine has been married for 5 years. Suddenly, her husband told her, "Let's have a baby." She asked him, "Will you help me with the baby? How often? Are you ready to deal with my hormonal surges? Will you be able to work for both of us? And if the child gets sick?"
  He quickly interrupted their conversation, saying, "You're sick." © Radostnya / Pikabu

• I hate it when people say that I make my elder daughter take care of the younger one. At 15, my daughter understands perfectly well that we have a limited budget. She knows all our mandatory expenses. She knows how much is left over for shopping and entertainment.
  A neighbor can pick up the younger daughter from the daily care, but we'll have to pay her, so my daughter won't have enough for a new phone. It's possible not to cook and eat delivery, but then there will be no money for shopping. We talk a lot, and my daughter knows exactly why and how she needs to help me. © Overheard / Ideer
• I'm in a hospital with my daughter, there's still a week away from discharge. My wife is at home with our son. It's not the first time I have to do this, because the daughter listens to me, and it's physically easier for me to carry her. I would like to ask you, "Is it the same for you - a week in the daily care - 2 weeks at home on sick leave?" We've been living like this for 2 years now. © 59Block / Pikabu
• Our firstborn was about 18 months. Walking, but not that agile. I was downstairs on the computer, the wife yelled down she was using the bathroom and for me to watch him. We misunderstood each other, so he was alone for about 3 minutes. She comes out asking where he is, and he is nowhere to be found in the house.
  Thinking he's just hiding, we start a full search, only to notice the back patio door is slightly open after a few minutes hunting. Growing concern at this point, but figuring he just snuck out back. A full search of the fenced/gated yard shows nothing. Now the heartbeat is going.
  Start running out and down the street. Find him 2 blocks down. He was heading to the park, which would have required crossing 2 roads, one of which was a busy one. Nice neighbors found him and were walking him home as they'd recognized us from previous walks. Needless to say, child locks went on all the doors in the house after that. © Rancethetank / Reddit

• I am 42, female, married, have a 16-year-old son. But the marriage is heading for divorce because my husband wants to become a daddy again. He wasn't involved in raising our first child. He had no valid reasons for that. He wasn't really busy with work, but something was always more important than spending time with his son.
  Now the boy is a teenager who sees his father as an ATM with the extended functionality of a taxi driver. We have a better relationship, but it's strained too. I suggest my husband to calm down, to support our son while he's preparing for college and improve their relationship with normal methods, instead of buying him a gaming console. But my husband has given up on the child and now wants a new one, who he wants to raise from the very beginning.
  I've got to know him pretty well over 20 years, and I don't believe him at all. But even if I did, I don't need a baby at 40, I don't have energy for that. So, my husband has started threatening me that he'll find another woman who'll have a child for him. © Podsushano / VK
• We live in a private house and keep a dog. Everyone in our family is either working or studying, so no one is home in the daytime.
  Once I returned home in the evening, and my younger brother, a student, told me that when he returned home, the neighbor started yelling at him that our dog had bitten her 4-year-old son. When asked, "How?" - she replied, "My son decided to play in your backyard, but as soon as he came in, he was immediately attacked by your dog." We have a 6-foot fence and a sign saying "Beware of dog." © Overheard / Ideer

• My youngest doesn't eat, and I try not to give him any snacks until he's hungry and eats properly. But there's an older kid at home who's screaming, "But I ate! Where's my dessert? Why do I have to suffer because of him?"
  And every time, I can't stop thinking, "What should I do? Let the older one eat biscuits in front of him? That's not right." A couple of years ago he was eating better, but now he has practically stopped eating meat and many other foods. © Inessa Fedorovna / ADME
• I used to think that all you need to do to raise a child is just feeding them. But now I understand: daily care, school, diseases, teach this, worry about that, give money for that, don't sleep for 2 years at least. So far we have only one child, and it's good. I can't imagine how women pull it all together alone. I freed my wife from this routine by 70%, but she still howled. © Lotses / Pikabu
• My sister with her child came to visit. The niece peed on the sofa at night, and on the carpet in the morning. The sister batted her eyes, "Didn't this happen with your child?" We have tiles in the bathroom and kitchen and linoleum in the nursery. In all other rooms, the baby had to wear diapers and then diaper pants.
  We dry-cleaned the sofa and the carpet, but the sofa began to smell again after a week. Now, I don't know how to tell my sister that her daughter cost us a nice amount of money - 2 dry cleanings and replacement of the sofa unit. © Overheard / Ideer

• My daughter is 3 years old. The scary sound coming from the nursery is when there is silence and then "Ouch." But the scariest thing about this sound is that the child reacts with the same "Ouch" to small things like paint spilled on the carpet, as well as to real dangers. By the time you get to the nursery, you have a few more gray hairs. © Nastassya / ADME
• My son had colic when he was a baby. He couldn't sleep in bed, only in my arms. Later, he was afraid to stay alone, "Mum, don't close the door to the toilet, I'm afraid." We had to agree that I would still close the door, but I would talk to him. © Olga_S / ADME

And here are a few tricks of how to raise emotionally healthy children. You could find them useful.