Studies Show “Unbearable” Mothers Raise More Successful Daughters
It’s true that guidelines for raising a successful child don’t actually exist. However, Ericka G. Rascon-Ramirez, a professor at the University of Essex, conducted a study that showed that demanding mothers manage to raise really successful daughters. Hence, successful women have very demanding mothers.
Bright Side has carefully studied this research and is ready to share some of the advantages of having an “unbearable” mother with you.
Sometimes teenagers feel angry with their mothers' nagging about occasional swearing, not letting them go out with friends, forcing them to wash dishes and having them take out the garbage. They even feel jealous of their friends' moms who are cool and carefree. If after another quarrel you hear again and again, “You will thank me later!” Get ready to be surprised - your mother might be right.
Ph.D. candidate, Ericka G. Rasсon-Ramirez, performed research that covered 15,000 pupils from 13 to 14 years. For 10 years, she studied the experiences of teenagers, collected the data and analyzed it. Based on the obtained results, Ericka came to the conclusion that strong, strict mothers raise children who succeed faster than children of kind mothers.
She also found that almost all successful people have strong, demanding mothers. It turns out that the shortest way to success is through pushy parenting.
This study wasn't centered on mothers who lock their daughters at home, control their every move, prohibit everything or use physical or mental abuse to control their children. An “unbearable mother” is just a mother who constantly gives instructions on future decision-making, warns about premature pregnancy and marriage, gives tasks and demands help with household chores; controls their kids' time, and has high hopes for their children's future. In general, these mothers do everything that most teenagers hate.
The professor explained that strict mothers are very demanding about their children's educational process, they insist on getting higher grades, and they set high expectations. They often express their opinions about this to their children.
Such children become more self-confident and persistent in the future. It turns out that pushy parenting also affects the possibility of an unplanned, early pregnancy. Daughters of persistent and demanding mothers were 5% less likely to enter into early motherhood.
Almost all children of strict mothers get a perfect education and a good job. Moreover, such people are able to speed up their career progression. Ericka explained that parents' recommendations always influence their children's decision making, even if they often resist it and refuse to accept it.
If a daughter rolls her eyes and backtalks during an argument, she knows that her mother wants all the best for her. Mothers often repeat the same information that remains in the brain of a teenager. So in the future, a daughter is more likely to listen to the advice from the annoying mother.
"In many cases, we succeed in doing what we believe is more convenient for us, even when this is against our parents' will," said Rascon-Ramirez. "But no matter how hard we tried to avoid our parents' recommendations, it is likely that they ended up influencing our choices."
All parents sooner or later ask themselves, "How do I raise a child? What's better: a carrot or a stick?" If children are raised too harshly, they distance themselves and begin to lie, because they are afraid to tell the truth. This happens when parents demand their child be perfect or insist on unquestioning obedience. It is a bad idea to base a relationship with children on fear. It's important to find the line between open communication, parental attention, and high standards.
Was your mother strict with you as a child? What do you think about this study? Share your opinion in the comments!
Preview photo credit Volver / Sony Pictures Classics