Why Parents Who Rage-Clean Kill Their Children’s Self-Esteem
Some parents want to instill a need for cleanliness and accuracy in their children no matter what, but this can lead to undesirable consequences. There are sad stories in which people who are already adults say that rage-cleaning made their childhood unbearable. But at the same time, the poll shows that for 36% of people, doing household chores is one of the greatest pleasures.
We, at Bright Side, want every child to like to clean. And we are ready to tell you why rage-cleaning can have a negative influence and offer some tips on how to make house cleaning more comfortable for the whole family.
1. Surprised guests or happy child
A rage-cleaning mother usually appears on the day guests are arriving. Children come home from school and see that she is nervously washing dishes, and at the same time sweeping the floor, wiping away dust, and throwing things away — which before, didn’t bother anyone. She screams and demands that they immediately do all their household chores. Interestingly enough, this is all usually being done in a house that is never perfectly clean. Doesn’t this mean that everything is done in order to make the guests say “wow”?
The children hardly understand what they are guilty of or why so much is being asked of them on that day. This makes them feel stressed and panicked. The children think that the guests are more important for their parents than they are and dinner might not be as enjoyable anymore, at least for them.
2. The child can develop negative associations with you.
This feeling can become habitual for children. When it happens the second, third, and fourth time — a reflex will soon develop. The children may always have a terrible feeling that they didn’t put something in its place and will now be scolded.
3. Rage-cleaning makes children unsure about things.
Parental support is important for children. If you want them to think that they are the best, just constantly tell them that. This rule can also work in the opposite way. So, a seemingly harmless bout of rage-cleaning might destroy a child’s self-esteem. After all, if your parents are pressing you for no reason, then what can you expect from the outside world?
4. The child can also feel uncomfortable around company.
Children often compare everything about their lives with others. They are always very pleased to know that they are the most loved. Once they stay overnight at a friend’s house and realize that no one in other families is forced to always have a perfectly clean house. Yes, they also help around the house and do a lot of household chores, but this doesn’t turn into paranoia.
5. Children, parents, and grandparents — rage-cleaning affects everyone
A rage-cleaning mom often turns into a rage-cleaning grandmother. Generation after generation, new kids might experience the same problem. The easiest way to solve this is to tell your mom that you appreciate her help, but that you’re trying something different. People also have many other tips about how they deal with this misunderstanding. They might be useful for those who have been rage-cleaning or have been taught to rage-clean their entire life.
6. Cleaning can be a pleasure.
In order not to live as a rage-cleaner, you should organize a long-term cleaning schedule. For example, divide your household chores by frequency of completion into daily, weekly, monthly, and yearly tasks. You can also divide the apartment into areas of responsibility between family members, including your children. These simple tips can help you always live in a clean house and not expend much effort on keeping it clean.
Did your mom ever turn into a rage-cleaning woman? Please, share your story with us.