15 People Shared the Witty Answers That Helped Them Land a Job Instantly

2 years ago

Job interviews are a real lottery and no one knows the secret to conquering the hearts of managers and interviewers. Some people manage to pick the best words and phrases that automatically guarantee them a place with a company. It might be a matter of luck, or maybe it’s the adrenaline that gives them their creative power.

Bright Side picked the luckiest stories about getting instantly employed.

1.

— Will you become the new star in the company?
— No, I want to be the moon, there are already too many stars.
— Why do you want to be the moon? Stars shine and the moon just reflects the light.

After thinking, I replied, “Light emitted by stars is of no use, neither during the day nor at night. But at least the moon reflects sunlight at night when we need it.” The interviewer smiled. Science made my day, and I got hired! Anonymous / Quora

2.

A company shortlisted 20 students for an interview round and intended to only hire 2.

Interviewer: What would you do if a better company with the same profile but a better package offers you the job?

Me: Sir, I would take that job.

Interviewer: This means that you are not loyal to us. Even if I offer you the job, there’s no guarantee that you will join our company. So why should I offer you one?

Me: Sir, if you find another candidate better than me, then you will offer them the job. So going by your logic, your company is not loyal to me. Everyone wants the best for themselves. You want the best people to work for you and I want to work for the best. Don’t you believe you are the best in the industry?

Result: Selected. Anonymous / Quora

3.

The company’s HR department asked me to teach a writing course. When I went in to discuss details, I was faced with 5 company executives who decided to interview me. They wanted their staff to go from an inability to write basic sentences to writing 10-page engineering reports after only 40 hours of instruction. I know some freelance teachers would agree to do the impossible to get the work.

I won’t. So I told them I wasn’t the teacher for them. I truly didn’t want the position, and that surprised them. They gave it to me anyway because I told them the truth. Verneita Boonlom / Quora

4.

5.

Manager: It’s almost 3 months into your final year of college and I’m sure many companies have come to your college campus for recruitment. Why haven’t you been placed in any of the other companies?

Me: Most of the companies that came to our college had a prerequisite for a “minimum 3.5 GPA” and “no history of failing a class” and since I had once failed math while I was in my second year of Engineering, I didn’t apply.

Manager: So you never bothered to even apply to those companies?

Me: I don’t think those companies, that don’t respect my failure, deserve me.

There was a long silence after I said those words. Then the manager smiled at me and said, “I like your answer.” End result: I got the job! Nikhil P Kulkarni / Quora

6.

Interviewer: OK, so we’re done with the technical part, would you like to tell me something else about yourself?

Me: If you would have been an HR interviewer, I would have told you many things, but since you aren’t, I wouldn’t like to tell you anything else about myself.

The expression on his face was priceless, maybe I should have been frightened.

Interviewer: I have an HR column, so you could tell me about yourself.

Me: But I still don’t want to share anything.

The interview finished 3-4 minutes later. I was still called for the next round which was the actual HR round, without any mention of the previous incident. I was selected for the job. Akriti More / Quora

7.

When I was 14, I wanted to get a job at a real estate development company. The manager said I was too young. I told him that I had been working since age 11, with a work permit, and showed him the article in my local paper, The Reston Sun-Times, to prove it. He said, “That’s a hardware store. We are much more sophisticated. This doesn’t prove anything.”

I said, “It proves that I fill each minute with 60 seconds worth of distance run.” He looked stunned and asked, “What did you say?!” I replied, “It’s from a poem by Rudyard Kipling.” And I recited the poem “If” from memory. He went quiet for a while and so did I.

Then he said, “OK, I love that. I will change the policies and we’ll hire you.” Alex Lightman / Quora

8.

9.

The CEO asked me, “How would you deal with a job that required you to work 6 days a week, 10 hours a day?”. All the company people held their breath. I responded immediately, “I’d organize it so I’d have five 12-hour days instead, so I could enjoy weekends with my wife.”

There were about 30 seconds of silence as everyone calculated 6 times 10 and compared it to 5 times 12. The CEO said “okay,” and left. I got the job. Gaku Sato / Quora

10.

I was called in for a second interview and was asked if I was willing to work rotating shifts. I told them I’d rather not, but I would if the job required it. One manager said I couldn’t expect to workdays all the time in a 24/7 industry. I replied that I preferred to work straight night shifts.

I got the job because the rotating shifts were causing a lot of turnover. Travis Grizzard / Quora

11.

My daughter applied for a job as a model for a tanning product. There was a line of prospective models there. When they went in for the interview, they all said something like, “You should hire me because I’m fun, funny, and like to have fun.” Not her.

She said, “I really like your product, I use it often, and would love to help you sell it.” Susan Kaveny / Quora

12.

13.

I was looking for a job. I had interviews lined up and went to each one. I took several tests for positions and passed them. Then I heard the same words I had heard all day: “We need someone with experience.”

I lost it right then and there. I stood up, hit his desk with both fists, and said, ’How in the world can I get experience if no one will hire me?" I turned around and started for the door. Then he said, “Report for work Monday morning at 8:00.”

I said thank you and worked there for 5 years. Sandra Taylor / Quora

14.

I was interviewing for a big law position. The firm was known for asking really tough questions. I was the last candidate of the day, it was late, and I could see those on the panel were tired. I don’t know why but I bounced into the room, thanked them all for seeing me despite the long day, and said I was sure they were tired by now.

They all instantly brightened. We had a very pleasant interview, mostly a friendly chat. At one point, someone asked a question about my CV. When I answered it, he seemingly picked a fight about my answer.

It was an odd thing to argue about, and that’s when I laughed and made a joke at my own expense. They offered me the job the next morning. Maryke S / Quora