A woman, 43, wrote to our editorial to tell a story that she cannot tell to anyone because of the fear of being severely judged. She fell in love with the best friend of her son, and now the relationship between her and her offspring has been simply terrible. She cannot find the way back to her son’s heart for 4 years already, and their recent meeting has left a bitter aftertaste for the desperate woman.
A woman named Anna, 43, wrote to our editorial and told us about her complex situation with her own son. She started her letter, saying, “I feel that I’ll be judged. But, I am writing to you to get a piece of advice on how to improve the situation.”
She gave birth to her one and only son when she was 21 years old. Her husband and her son’s dad passed away 2 years after the boy, Nick, was born. So it was only Anna and her son against the whole world.
The woman admitted that when it came to her dating life, she hasn’t been very lucky. She wrote that she had some random dates here and there and very few relationships that didn’t last long. That all was during her son’s childhood.
One day, everything changed for Anna, though she wasn’t expecting it at all. Her son introduced her to his best friend.
Anna continues with her letter, saying, that things went normally until her son decided to introduce his friend to her. She says, “In the beginning of Nick’s senior year, he brought Max, his best friend, to our house. Since then, Max came to our house basically every other weekend. I was totally happy because my son didn’t have a good social life and couldn’t boast with many friends. He usually kept to himself.”
The woman confessed that she really liked Max as a person. To her, he seemed a really nice and sociable guy. They occasionally had short conversations when Max was at their place.
Then, the woman writes, “We exchanged numbers just in case. He immediately started sending me messages and all sorts of jokes. I usually responded back. Nick didn’t mind at all, and I could see that he treated it in a normal way.”
After 6 months of visiting their house, Max texted Anna that he wanted to meet up for a cup of coffee. That was a message that came out of nowhere, nothing was leading to it. Anna asked if it was something urgent or about Nick. Max said it was something really urgent and important. Anna was intrigued, so she agreed for that meeting.
Anna goes on with her story, describing their first meeting with her son’s friend. She wrote, “When we met, he appeared very nervous. I asked him what was the purpose of that meeting. He firstly asked me not to tell my son about it. He then said that he had feelings for me. I was shocked by his confession. I told him that of course I was flattered, but I had to think about Nick. He asked me to give him a single chance.”
The woman was hesitating a lot, but finally, her wish to feel loved won. She writes, “It was so long that I found somebody interested in me like that. Max was already 18 when he was introduced to me, and he was a very handsome man. I finally agreed to start this relationship, but I had a condition that it would have a form of a casual dating and Nick shouldn’t even know about it all.”
The couple ended up meeting the following week at Max’s place. Anna lied to Nick that she went for a meeting with her colleagues.
Their meetups became very frequent, and the relationship gradually grew stronger. Anna soon realized that she fell in love with Max. He was quickly becoming the woman’s major source of joy. She admitted that she wanted the weekend to start earlier just to be with her beloved. And she somehow forgot to pay attention to anything else in her life.
When Nick, Anna’s son, was preparing for his flight to college, the woman received a message from Max saying that Nick knows everything about them. Anna got it in the middle of her working day.
The woman was even afraid to go back home, and when she finally did and met her son, he barely uttered a word about the situation. He didn’t comment on her and Max’s relationship and was very cold to her. When she dropped him off at the airport, he didn’t even give her a hug and didn’t even look back at her when it was time for the flight.
It’s been 4 years now. Max and Anna have a 1-year-old daughter. Max works as an engineer. The airport was the last time Anna saw Nick. He blocked her on his phone and all social networks.
Anna asked her late husband’s parents if he ever got in touch with them. Nick’s grandfather told her that her son told them her story with Max, and he promised to take care of Nick. But both Nick’s grandparents were furious with Anna and asked her not to contact them or Nick.
Anna got a call from Nick when she already lost hope to see him again. They agreed to meet and to talk.
During their meeting, her son told her that he never actually had an issue with her dating or meeting someone. In fact, he hoped that Anna found love. Nick said that he realized his mom needed companionship and a type of love he couldn’t offer as her son. But throughout all these years he felt conflicted because both Max and his mom had a right to find happiness.
Nick admitted that there were some things that he hasn’t been able to get over. He said he couldn’t get over the fact that his mom didn’t take him into consideration when it came to starting a relationship. For the young man, it has been hurtful to realize that Anna would value a romantic relationship to the point of destroying a close relationship with her son for it.
At the end of their meeting, Nick said that he has a wife and his in-laws and his wife are his family now. The young man said he just wanted to meet his mom before permanently cutting her off. He asked Anna not to contact him or his family at all. And the woman’s son made it clear he wouldn’t be there for her at her last stage of life or even come to his mom’s funeral.
We’re grateful to Anna for having told us her very complex and emotional story. We’d advise the woman to not treat the situation as a total failure and try to find different ways to win her son’s heart back again.
She could ask her now-husband Max to help her out with this, as he and Nick used to be friends. So, actually, Max might know Nick from the side, which wasn’t very obvious to his own mom.
Max might act as a mediator in this relationship and try to help his wife to get in touch with Nick again. This way or that, we believe that Anna should try to involve people who are significant for Nick and try to ask them for favor.
And here’re the stories of people whose life will never be the same after they revealed some truth about their nearest and dearest.
A 42 year old who starts a relationship with the 18-year-old friend of their own kid is creepy. That it's a woman doesn't make better than if the older person is a man. This was grooming, and inappropriate, and she hid her relationship as long as she could because she knew it was inappropriate.
Anna is a complete perve. Nick is 100% right to disconnect from her.
