I Don’t Wear a Bra to Go to Work and Now My Colleagues Are Side-Eyeing Me

In workplaces where conformity often reigns supreme, one simple act can stir whispers and sideways glances. For many, the choice not to wear a bra under professional attire might seem insignificant, yet for others, it challenges deeply ingrained norms. Join us as we navigate the complex interplay between personal expression and professional expectations in the modern workplace.

One woman shared her side of the story.

This is easily the most absurd controversy that I have been involved in, in my life.

Day 1 of my new job. I wear a sweater and pants to work. I do not wear a bra. I have never worn a bra for two years at my previous job, and nobody has ever brought it up. I hate bras, I find them very uncomfortable and unnecessary.

Two people come up to me during the day, and say that what I’m wearing is inappropriate and that I should wear a bra to work. This is a new job, I don’t even know any of these people. I’m literally wearing a sweater, you can’t see anything, I’m all covered up. (You can’t see anything except the shape of my boobs, I guess). One woman literally told me these words, as she was complaining about my clothes. I have large boobs, but I feel that what I’m wearing is completely normal.

Day 2 of my new job. I do not wear a bra, but I wear a T-shirt and a jacket on top of that. I am dressed even more conservatively than on day 1. Two more people give me similar criticisms again.

One of them is the secretary of my supervisor, so this is getting serious. I mention to her that the office literally has no dress code and that employees can wear what is comfortable. She says that there is still an unspoken etiquette to be followed. She also mentioned that the shape of my boobs was clearly visible.

For the two years I spent at my previous office, I did not wear a bra once. I usually wore sweaters or t-shirts or blouses, most of the time, along with a jacket. Even though I may have large breasts, I did not see it as inappropriate or a problem.

Am I wrong here?

People were divided on their opinions.

• “The real question is whether this is a hill that you want to die on. Bras are a pretty standard attire requirement, reasonable for not. As the new person in the office, you do not have the credibility to push back on that expectation without serious career repercussions. If people notice you are not wearing a bra, something about your outfit is off.” Veroul / Reddit
• “I am afraid that even if you do not see it as inappropriate, your new workplace does. To the extent that 4 people over 2 days have said something to you. That was your supervisor sending a message via the secretary, by the way. You will get fired or let go if you continue to not wear something. Can you wear a bralette, crop top bra, comfort bra/sleep bra, or similar?” firefly232 / Reddit
• “We just aren’t there yet. We keep fighting, but we gotta pay bills too. If that many people notice it, bite the bullet.
  Unpopular opinion — you deserve to be comfortable, but not at the expense of those you work with. Not for this. If a man is wearing pants that show his package, I wouldn’t be comfortable and if I complained as a woman, guarantee he’d have to change his manner of dress.” BulkyInformation2 / Reddit

• “Women’s breasts should be normalized, but society isn’t there yet, and it is usually very noticeable. Overall, I’m saying you’re not wrong because it should be normal, but I understand it making people uncomfortable because it’s not yet. If I were you, I would wear sports bras/bralettes/camis just to keep the peace since it’s a new workplace, and you don’t want to be starting off on the wrong foot.” heathahR / Reddit
• “If there is no dress code, do what you want, but also it’s in their rights to want a certain level of professionalism.” Chaliskis / Reddit
• “It’s ridiculous that people are this upset over your boobs and how you choose to dress when there’s not even a dress code. Sounds like they have a staring problem, I’m sure HR would love to hear about it.” AlwaysKirby / Reddit

• “It doesn’t matter what happened at your last job you’re not there any longer, you’re at a new job. If you really can’t handle wearing a bra, you’re going to have to look for a new job, sue this company so you can not wear one, or go back to your old company.” kellydofc / Reddit
• “I don’t think I have ever had a job that didn’t state proper undergarments needed to be worn. I can’t imagine risking employment over a bra.” SnooPeppers1641 / Reddit
• “You’re wrong for pretending not to know that most professional workplaces consider a bra part of professional attire. If you want to go against that norm, you do you, but if you have anything but A-cup breasts, people are gonna notice.” NYCQuilts / Reddit

The decision to forgo a bra in the workplace sheds light on broader discussions surrounding individual autonomy and societal expectations. While some may view it as a small act of rebellion, it serves as a reminder of the ongoing struggle for acceptance and inclusivity in professional settings. It’s essential to continue challenging norms that limit personal expression and embrace diversity in all its forms. By fostering environments where individuals feel empowered to be their authentic selves, we can create more inclusive and supportive workplaces for everyone.