“My Son’s Brother Asked Me to Be His Mum Too,” Foster Mother Ends Up Adopting Three Siblings One by One

When young adults exit the foster care system at the age of 18, a staggering one out of every five individuals finds themselves without a home. This troubling statistic underscores the critical need for effective support and resources to ensure these vulnerable individuals’ smooth and stable transition into adulthood. Amy showed a valuable example by adopting 3 young boys and changing their lives forever.

Becoming a foster parent.

Before obtaining her foster parent license, she had been making monthly visits to a local orphanage for several years. Fostering and adoption had always held a special place in her heart. She had assumed that it would be something she pursued once she had settled into life a bit more or after she got married.

Finding her first son Jeremy.

During her visits to an orphanage, she noticed an 8-year-old boy who displayed signs of deep trauma. Over the course of the following 7 months, she formed a bond with him, wishing she could provide him with a home. However, due to not being licensed, she couldn’t take him in.

Fortunately, her path crossed with Rescue 100, a program designed to expedite the foster parent licensing process. She completed the necessary steps and eagerly anticipated reuniting with the boy. To her dismay, she discovered that Jeremy had been relocated to another orphanage in a town three hours away.

Undeterred, she tirelessly pursued every avenue available, determined to bring him home. Despite initial setbacks and a sense of confusion, she held on to her belief that she was destined to help this child. Finally, after months of waiting, her phone rang one day.

On the other end was Jeremy’s social worker, reaching out because she had heard about the woman’s interest in taking him in. The social worker revealed that Jeremy’s situation was heading toward permanency and asked if she was willing to adopt him if necessary. She responded: “Let me remind you, adopting him wasn’t my goal — but I forgot about that plan and responded with a resounding ‘YES!’”

Addressing the boy’s trauma.

She found herself unsure of how to navigate through the depths of Jeremy’s trauma. In the midst of it all, she only knew one thing: to love him unconditionally. She made herself available, ready to listen, hold him, and fulfill the role of a mother.

The days seemed endless and challenging. She had to take time off from work to visit his school and plead with his teachers to show him patience. Tears stained her pillow many nights as she questioned her ability to meet his needs.

Finding Jeremy’s siblings.

One Saturday morning, a significant moment unfolded during a regular sibling visit, altering her life once again. While the kids joyfully played at the park. Suddenly, she felt a gentle tug on her shirt. Turning around, she met the eyes of Jeremy’s brother, Kendrick. Concerned, she asked if he needed anything or if he was alright.

Kendrick’s question pierced her heart, “Are you Jeremy’s mom?” Overwhelmed, she confirmed, “Yes, buddy, I am.” Then came his heartfelt plea, “Will you be my mom too?” Her emotions welled up, and she embraced him, lost for words: “My son’s brother asked me to be his mum, too”.

However, she couldn’t make a promise to Kendrick because she couldn’t fathom taking him without bringing his little brother along. The idea of taking on two more children seemed impossible. She was adamant about not doing it.

She thought, “No way, God. Not happening.” Less than a week later, her other two sons were home, and she officially became a single mother of three boys.

The day of the adoption.

As adoption approached, doubts and fears consumed her thoughts. She questioned her ability to be enough and wondered if she was making the right decision. Insecurities began to set in, overshadowing her confidence.

One morning, as they were on their way to school, silence enveloped the car, broken unexpectedly by her middle son, Kendrick. He pleaded, “Momma, can you call the judge? He’s taking too long. Does he know that I need you to be my momma? I can’t wait anymore. I need to be adopted.”

For three long years, her boys clung to fragments of hope, yearning for a forever family. Then, on April 1, 2019, she had the immense privilege of adopting her beloved boys, cementing their hearts with the knowledge that they were finally home forever.

She understood that everyone has their own waiting and hopes, and she assured others that they have not been forgotten. Their time will come, and their desires will manifest. Perhaps, like her, they simply needed a reminder that they were enough and precisely where they were meant to be.

Parenthood brings immense joy, regardless of the way it is embraced. Barry Farmer serves as a prime example of this. Having spent his childhood in foster care, Barry, a 34-year-old unmarried father, has chosen to adopt three children from the foster care system. He has made it his priority to provide them with the security of the father he never had.

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