10 Things Grandparents Do That Parents Often Can’t Stand
Grandparents who regularly spend time with their grandchildren increase their well-being, according to research. They usually try to help parents and make their lives easier, but in reality, these actions often just complicate things.
Bright Side revealed the most common things that lead to disagreements between 2 generations.
1. Criticizing parenting practices
The International Journal of Educational Research and Development found that parental authority is an essential tool in the process of raising children. Any negative statements from grandparents certainly don’t help moms and dads to set an example for their child. In the worst cases, it can even severely undermine trust between them.
2. Buying unnecessary toys
Parents know very well which toys children already have and which ones they really need. In addition, when refusing to buy everything, they teach their kids to value money and spend it wisely. When interfering in this process, the grandparents do the child a disservice.
3. Publishing photos without permission
Parents can grow afraid of sending photos of children to their grandparents because they often immediately appear on the Internet. The older generation isn’t always so familiar with information technology, so grannies and granddads sometimes don’t understand that absolutely any person will be able to see these photos. Of course, parents, in their turn, may not want to put their private life on public display.
4. Encouraging every little thing
A study says that excessive praise can lead to a lack of motivation. Often, grandparents start to emphasize their attention only on the good deeds of their grandchildren and encourage them for nothing. But as it turns out, this encouragement can kill the child’s desire to move forward.
5. Imposing their own rules
According to a study, children are very susceptible to influences from the outside world. Their worldview and values are very fragile, so it’s important they face the least amount of contradictions. When parents teach children one thing and grandparents another, this leads to dissonance which can complicate the learning process.
6. Secretly feeding them sweets
The American Heart Association’s scientific statement says that children ages 2 to 18 should eat or drink less than 6 teaspoons of added sugars daily. Typically, children are uninterested in the results of scientific research, so parents have to carefully monitor their nutrition. When grandparents feed their grandchildren sweets secretly, it brings them pleasure — but at the same time, it causes great damage to their health.
7. Telling their friends everything about their grandchildren
We often come to our parents for advice, even about raising children. We can discuss quite intimate things that are best not shared with strangers. Learning that friends of the grandparents not only learned of these things but also thoroughly discussed them, usually infuriates parents.
8. Buying them ridiculous clothes
The world of fashion is changing so fast that sometimes you don’t even know if you look stylish according to modern standards yourself. The age difference between grandparents and grandchildren can be very apparent when it comes to choosing clothes. Moms and dads don’t want to offend the older generation but at the same time, want their child to look stylish. Such a contradiction puts them in an uncomfortable position.
9. Neglecting bedtime
In an attempt to win the affection of a grandchild, grandparents may sometimes allow them to go to bed late or not take a nap after lunch. At the same time, scientists say that preschoolers should sleep 10-13 hours a day and teenagers at least 8 hours. A lack of sleep can lead to serious illnesses such as diabetes and can also affect brain activity. That’s why parents don’t like it when someone allows their children to break their sleep schedule.
10. Allowing them to watch TV all day
Today, television plays a significant role in our lives. For children, this is not only a means of entertainment, but it’s also a way of getting to know the world. But grandparents often forget about reasonable limits. In 2015, scientists learned how much time children should spend watching TV. Watching TV for more than 2 hours a day can lead to high blood pressure in children.
Do you think grandparents should interfere with raising children or not? If yes, then to what degree?