How to Recognize a Man Who Can Make Your Life a Nightmare by His Online Profile
The 2013 study showed that almost 1/3 of modern couples met online on social media platforms, in chats, on forums, and on specialized websites. Internet communication has become an everyday thing and we’re no longer afraid that we’re chatting with a maniac. However, not all dates and relationships end well, and we might regret the time we wasted with the wrong people.
Bright Side offers you to take a look at the profiles of people who are very unlikely to make a good partner. Some of them want to use you and disappear and others will not leave you alone even when you want them to.
1. One-night-stand seeker
Photo: Several photos of his naked body: on the beach, in the pool, or just at home. Most of the pictures don’t show his face.
Info: Age and job (often, the job is not real). They usually write that they are going to spend just 3 days in your city, they are looking for people to “have a good time with.”
Behavior: He’ll say that he fell in love with you and that you are different from other girls. But all this serves only one purpose. He might be direct about his intentions, he might invite you to a restaurant, and then, to a hotel or to your place. He often says weird things like “Do you like adventures?” or “How far are you ready to go?”
What to do: Ignore his messages. If you are okay with “having fun” with a stranger, remember about your safety. For example, tell a friend when and where you are going.
2. Fan of animals and children
Photo: With pets, mostly with dogs. Photos with younger brothers/sisters, nephews, friends’ children.
Info: To make sure you understand how much he loves animals and pets, he will repeat this in the profile description.
Behavior: The internet is full of articles saying that pet owners are family-oriented. That’s why some guys use dogs to give the impression of being very kind and caring. They hope that you will be blinded by what they have to offer and won’t notice their flaws.
What to do: Try to talk about animals and children as little as you can, and find out what other things he has in his life. The character traits that a guy hides can be an unpleasant surprise for you in the future.
3. Jock or “enlightened”
Photo: Gym, muscles, running, and football. Or a selfie in a vegetarian café or photographs which remind the Woodstock festival and the ’60s.
Info: He might mention that he is looking for a girl without bad habits, that he wakes up really early, and gets his energy from the Sun.
Behavior: He’ll tell you about his athletic achievements and spiritual practices — yoga, meditation, and lucid dreaming.
What to do: There is nothing wrong with a healthy lifestyle, but going overboard isn’t a good thing. Such people may expect you to fully accept their lifestyle and to follow it too. They might want to make you get up at 5 AM with them and run every morning. But is there something real in these people, or is their lifestyle just a mask to hide the void?
Photo: Carnival costumes, weird poses, weird places, group pictures with weird friends.
Info: Absurd, strange jokes which you might not understand.
Behavior: They often start the conversation in a strange way, they might ask you a weird question to demonstrate their creativity.
What to do: Most likely, you have enough things to worry about in your life, do you really need one more? Before you see this man’s real face, you will have to tear through a lot of wrapping paper.
5. Nightclub regular
Photo: Of course, from nightclubs.
Info: “YOLO”, alcohol, parties.
Behavior: Such people will often compliment you and ask you where you “chill” and they will also tell you stories about their super interesting lives.
What to do: If you are looking for a serious relationship, you don’t need this guy. Usually, only emotionally immature people behave this way. They can’t make adult decisions and they rarely think about tomorrow.
6. Car fan
Photo: “Me in the car,” “Me near the car,” “This is my car.”
Info: What info do you need? He has a car!
Behavior: “Hey, babe, you wanna go for a ride?” and stuff like that.
What to do: Of course, it’s good if a person has enough money to buy a car. But if he has nothing else to be proud of, do you really need such a man?
7. Perfect man
Photo: Professional photos in front of beautiful places and different cities.
Info: There is not enough space for the information about him: he travels, he’s athletic, he takes photographs, he helps the needy, and he sews clothes.
Behavior: All your interests will accidentally match. You’ll say that you love cooking — he’ll say that he experiments and cooks something new every weekend. You love drawing — he’ll say that he does, too: his works even took prizes at many competitions!
What to do: There is no such thing as a perfect person. This type just wants to seem ideal which might signal that this man has serious psychological issues. Most likely, he will be very manipulative and narcissistic. So, don’t believe this pseudo-ideal thing.
8. Bored at the office
Photo and info: Ordinary. He might mention that he is not married.
Behavior: He is online only during office hours and never after 6 PM. He tries to get some intimate details from you and asks you to send him some weird photos which you should take right now.
What to do: Don’t be afraid to be direct and ask him what he’s looking for or just stop the conversation altogether. Most likely, this is a regular office worker who is bored at work. He probably has a wife and kids and all of your photos might be seen by the entire giggling office.
Photo and info: Either there are no photos at all, or they are obviously from the internet.
Behavior: It looks like he sends you template messages. He might call you a different name because he’s sent the same message to someone else before. He sends you a link and comes up with a reason for you to click it. Or he texts that he doesn’t have any photos and offers you to contact him through Skype.
What to do: Don’t follow the link unless you want to lose all the money you have in your bank account. Don’t accept a video call if you don’t want to see him naked.
10. Pickup guru
Photo: The best pictures he has.
Info: A good job, a list of advantages.
Behavior: Instead of a regular “Hello” you will hear “Babe, are you parents gardeners? No? Then, how come they have such a beautiful flower?” Millions of gurus teach these ugly pickup lines that make no sense.
What to do: Make up a good joke before you say goodbye to him.
11. Misunderstood genius
Photo and info: A list of advantages, maybe he mentions that he has trust issues and that his heart was once broken.
Behavior: He will do all he can to try to look good and nice. If you don’t respond to his messages right away or refuse to see him in a cafe, he will start complaining that all women are the same and you are blowing him off without even giving him a chance.
What to do: Think about your problems, not about someone else’s. Such behavior is normal for narcissists. They pretend to be victims, and they think that everyone owes them something. If you don’t want to waste your time, stop the conversation immediately. You can recommend that he see a psychologist but he is unlikely to listen to you.
12. The Manipulator
Photo and info: Nothing outstanding.
Behavior: The profile might not seem suspicious and the man will seem to be sincere and interested. But when you are busy, he will give you a shower of messages or he will insult you for not responding. He also might turn out to be a manipulator: he will listen to you attentively, but actually, he will try to find out more information about you and look for your weak spots. And after that, he will disappear. This is a deliberate move: now you will be worried and bombard him with messages and he will take his time to “melt” and reward you for the effort. He might deny his own actions and twist your words.
What to do: If you noticed that the dialogue becomes a monologue or that he is cold and then suddenly warm, just tell him that you don’t want to continue the communication. If he starts insulting or threatening you, just block him.
Who to date then?
Even though online dating is extremely popular nowadays, it’s very hard to learn a lot of information about a person only by their social media page. And the first impression is often wrong.
Psychologist Meredith Golden advises you to pay more attention to the men who suggest a meeting at a time that’s convenient for you, those who support the conversation topics you like, learn things about you, and don’t talk only about themselves.
A normal person starts a conversation with a “Hello” instead of an inappropriate joke or a pickup move. Continue the relationship with the people who don’t hide information about the place they work, their age, their marital status, and their goals.
Have you ever found a date online? Did this relationship lead to a wedding?