I Abandoned My Daughter For a Romantic Vacation With My Wife

People
5 months ago

In the pursuit of their dream vacation, a couple faces an unprecedented moral dilemma. This story invites readers to explore the tumultuous emotional landscape of a father who made a controversial decision that challenges the very essence of his role as a parent.

He explained what happened.

My wife and I have always dreamed of celebrating our 40th anniversary with a luxurious vacation. Just the two of us, reliving the romance of our early years. We had it all planned out for years now and were excited beyond words.

Enter our adult daughter Jane. Jane and her husband got wind of our plans and promptly invited themselves and their two children along. I originally put my foot down and told them this trip was just for us which upset her some. But my wife has a hard time saying no to Jane, as she is the youngest of our children and our only daughter, and she didn’t want to hurt her feelings, so she reluctantly agreed to let them join.

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I wasn’t thrilled about it at the time, but I wanted to make my family happy, and I knew my wife was also okay with the idea of a “family” trip even if she was heartbroken we wouldn’t get our romantic trip. We went along with it. The place we were originally going was not child-friendly so we changed course and decided on an all-inclusive family-friendly resort. We paid for the resort and our grandchildren’s plane tickets. Jane and her husband only had to pay for their own airfare.

Here’s where things get complicated. As the vacation got closer, I started having a change of heart. I realized that our 40th anniversary was a once-in-a-lifetime milestone, and I wanted to honor it in a way that was true to our original plans. My wife and I might not be able to afford a trip like this again for quite some time and it’s something we always wanted to do.

So, without consulting anyone, I switched our tickets last minute to go to the romantic destination that my wife and I had originally planned for. I did not tell Jane or her husband. I didn’t even tell my wife until the day before our flight left, which was a day before Jane’s flight left for their vacation.

It wasn’t an easy decision and I feel guilty about it. But I wanted our 40th anniversary to be the special, intimate celebration we had always hoped for.

We called Jane after we landed to tell her and she was extremely upset, to say the least. She seemed of the idea that we were going to look after our grandkids so she and her husband could have alone time and now that I abandoned her they would have to do it all themselves. I hung up on them when my son-in-law started shouting and my wife and I enjoyed the rest of our trip.

They came back the same day we did but have not answered any of our texts and Jane seems to be ignoring me. My wife told me she vastly preferred our trip to the family trip we would have taken but she still doesn’t like how Jane is mad at us and wants me to apologize. I’m not sure I want to after learning Jane and her husband were using us for free babysitting and a free trip but I feel like I should just to keep the peace.

Was I wrong for changing our trip destination last minute and leaving Jane and her family to fend for themselves?

People stood on his side.

  • “If your daughter and son-in-law wanted alone time on a trip, they could have gone on a different trip and politely asked you and your wife to watch the kids while they were away. Not try and hijack your trip!” Ok_S****_1056 / Reddit
  • “You should have set your foot down earlier so you would not have had to hide your change of plans later. You are not wrong for wanting a trip for the two of you, but you never should have agreed to allow Jane and family to come along.” Zealousideal-Sail972 / Reddit
  • “She has no right to expect you to be her babysitter on your 40th wedding anniversary trip!! Jane needs to check her entitlement, funny how she wanted time with her husband without the kids but didn’t think you and your wife would want that on such a special occasion.”
    No_Initiative_8480 / Reddit

You certainly exposed your daughter's unfortunate character - selfishness and lack of love, respect and honour of parents. She seems to place her own wants above yours. Now isn't that something that needs to change? Apologize? No, but give her the opportunity to discuss her issues and a chance to change her heart toward you, yes.

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  • “You have catered to her needs seems a bit too much and she has gotten the idea that YOUR world revolves mainly around her (maybe because she is your youngest?) but she is an adult person in a relationship with kids now so should understand quickly you have your relationship and life outside being her parent.” atealein / Reddit
  • “Your daughter and husband invited themselves on your anniversary trip to get alone time. Using both of you as babysitters on your anniversary is selfish. If they want alone time, they could’ve planned their vacation and not leech off of you and your wife.” RaineMist / Reddit
  • “Honestly, it sounds like you dodged a last-minute bullet, especially with it seeming as though they planned to have y’all watch their kids. Very proud of you for that decision and ultimately choosing your happiness. Your daughter is grown and hopefully, they make it to their 40th to get the same trip.” Nothin2SeeeHere / Reddit

We hope this journey of self-discovery and growth ultimately brings the family closer, teaching them that every decision, no matter how well-intentioned, has consequences that must be faced with honesty and compassion.

Preview photo credit Flat-Blueberry-4469 / Reddit

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