I Refuse to Let My DIL Eat My Groceries—She Needs to Pay

Why is this such a big deal? Okay she eats a lot, and then? She is you DIL at the end of the day? At least respect your son and don't make such a drama over food!

Yes she needs to get over that, it's just food

Edie Britt

You’re spot on. She’s raiding your fridge like it’s hers, and groceries cost money. She should pay her share or stop acting entitled.

Cheryl Cadwell

2 days ago

Are you a PIG too? You don't eat someone else's food that is meant to feed others.

Cheryl Cadwell

2 days ago

And she ISN'T PAYING FOR ANY OF IT.

Cheryl Cadwell

2 days ago

How about the SON and DIL RESPECTING HIS MOTHER? THIS generation of free loaders, has got to learn how to support themselves.

Hi Bright Side,

My name is Susan D., I’m 56, and my son and his wife moved in “just for a few months” after some personal issues. I was happy to help (I stocked the fridge, cooked meals, and tried to make everyone comfortable). But 8 months later, it feels like my home has turned into a free-for-all. My groceries disappear faster than I can buy them, and my son doesn’t seem to care.

Thanksgiving was the last straw. I had carefully planned the meal, saved the turkey, and prepared all the sides for a cozy family dinner. When I went to the fridge, the turkey was gone, I mean it was completely eaten by my daughter-in-law.

I grabbed my phone and sent them a message explaining that I couldn’t cover groceries forever and that she needed to contribute. Instead of understanding, she laughed and said, “It’s your house, but your rules are ridiculous.” My son shrugged like my frustration didn’t even matter.

I’ve always tried to be kind and empathetic, but this feels like blatant disrespect. I want to support them, and I love my family, but I can’t allow my generosity to be treated as an endless privilege. Should I continue paying for everything, or is it fair to insist that my DIL pay for the groceries she eats? I feel guilty for standing my ground, but also angry that my patience has been tested for so long.

— Susan

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Susan, you’re acting like your DIL committed a crime when all she did was eat some food in a house she lives in. Nobody should have to “pay” to grab something from the fridge like it’s a convenience store, and the fact that you turned this into a whole family meltdown is honestly PATHETIC. If you can’t handle another adult eating from a shared kitchen, that’s not a boundary problem, that’s you being controlling, petty, and weirdly obsessed with policing basic human needs. Grow up and stop treating dinner like it’s some sacred artifact.

Susan, you’re not wrong for feeling hurt. Anyone would be upset if their groceries kept disappearing, especially something as big as a whole Thanksgiving turkey. When family moves in, it’s normal to hope for teamwork and respect, not a one-sided situation where you feel taken for granted.

Your daughter-in-law laughing off your concerns is a big red flag. It shows she’s gotten way too comfortable treating your home like a free store. And your son shrugging? That stings. But it also means you’ve reached the point where “being the nice one” isn’t working anymore.

You’re not asking for anything crazy. You’re simply saying, “If you eat it, help pay for it.” That’s normal. That’s adult life. It’s the only way family living under one roof stays peaceful.

Setting rules doesn’t make you a bad mother-in-law, know it, it makes you a person who knows her worth. You opened your door, your fridge, and your heart. The least they can give is respect.

So yes, it’s absolutely fair to insist she pays for groceries. Stand your ground with calm, clear words. Let them know the “free ride” chapter is over and a new one (called shared responsibility) begins now.

Families work best when everyone gives, not when one person carries the whole load. You’re not being mean. You’re simply protecting your home and your peace.

Every family has that story. Have you ever clashed with your daughter-in-law, son-in-law, or other in-laws over money, food, or control? It’s time to vent. Drop your in-law stories and advice in the comments.

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Why are you making this a whole crisis? Seriously, she eats a lot… and what? Is that a federal emergency now? She’s your daughter-in-law, not a random stranger who raided your fridge at 3 AM. The way you’re acting over food is embarrassing. If you can’t bring yourself to respect her, at least show some basic respect for your son. You’re blowing this so far out of proportion that it’s giving secondhand cringe. Grow up and stop policing what another adult puts on their plate.

You literally chose groceries over your family’s dignity. That’s not boundary setting, that’s mental gymnastics for petty. Learn how adult relationships and food work, or better yet shut the hell up before you start pricing air in your own house. Because right now you’re serving secondhand embarrassment with a side of reach that’s way past dramatic.

Jasmine

Susan, dearest, don't listen to these people. You’re totally right to be annoyed. She’s not just visiting, she’s basically raiding your kitchen like it’s free-for-all, and that’s not cool. Groceries cost money, and if she’s going through stuff you buy, yeah, she should pay her share. That’s just adulting 101. If she wants to eat like the fridge is endless, she can start chipping in instead of acting all shocked that you’re setting boundaries. You’re not being petty, you’re just making her own up for her actions. AND THAT'S ALRIGHT!

Mikkie