I Came Out As Abrosexual — It Took Me 30 Years to Find My Identity and Friends Responded Cruelly

Abrosexuality is an emerging sexual identity that has recently gained significant attention online. Emma Flint, a journalist from the UK, came out as abrosexual after struggling for 30 years with confusion about her true identity. Now, at 32, she feels a sense of relief and fully embraces her identity, free from the anxiety that once accompanied her feelings. Flint has publicly shared her experience, helping to define the meaning of this term for her broad audience.

When Emma first discovered her identity, she faced a significant backlash.

A woman has shared her experience of facing backlash from friends after coming out as abrosexual, with some harshly questioning whether her sexuality was even valid.

Emma Flint recalled the moment she first told her friends about her identity, saying, “When I first told my friends that I’m abrosexual, I received so many hurtful comments from them. These people aren’t my friends anymore.” She explained that being open about her identity has allowed her to feel more confident and at ease with her feelings.

Although Gen Z is actively discussing this sexuality on platforms like TikTok, there is still considerable confusion surrounding the term, with many people unsure of its meaning.

Emma shared her feelings with a wider audience, hoping to be understood and accepted.

In her interview, Emma shared the skeptical responses she received, including comments like, “When did you decide this? Is this even a label? I’ve never heard of it. I support you, obviously, but this doesn’t sound real.”

Despite the wide range of sexual identities known today, 32-year-old Emma admitted that she had never heard of abrosexuality while growing up. In the 1990s, society largely recognized only straight, gay, or lesbian orientations, with anything beyond that often dismissed as “invented.”

“Of course, we know that’s far from the truth — but societal blind spots mean we learn terms much slower than if they’re readily accessible,” she explained, adding that she had struggled to identify her sexuality because it fluctuated “so rapidly.”

Emma has bravely come out as abrosexual, helping to raise awareness and familiarize people with the term.

Emma Flint, a freelance journalist, wrote an insightful article for Metro’s “Platform” section, which features “opinions, real-life stories, and analysis from experts in their fields.”

“For those of you who don’t know what abrosexuality is, in layperson’s terms, it simply means when someone’s sexual identity fluctuates and changes,” Flint explained. She shared that she didn’t come across the term until she was 30 and expressed frustration that abrosexuality still isn’t widely recognized.

Emma decided to educate a broader audience about her identity, noting, “Often, people don’t go looking to educate themselves on different orientations unless it directly affects them — without that incentive, I’ve found many stick to what they know already.”

She continued, “I didn’t learn about abrosexuality until two years ago, when I was 30. Up until that point, I’d struggled to identify what my sexuality was because it fluctuated so rapidly. There were times when I too scoffed, chastising myself for being so uncertain of who I was. It wasn’t that I couldn’t make my mind up, but rather my identity shifted.”

Emma shared what “abrosexuality” means, providing a detailed explanation.

Emma detailed that her abrosexuality means that one day she may feel attracted to women, and days or weeks later, she may feel more aligned with bisexuality. “My sexuality was fluid,” she explained. Initially, she experienced confusion and miscommunication with those she tried to share her identity with. She would occasionally hear comments like, “But you said you were a lesbian only last week.” People simply didn’t understand, and at the time, Emma didn’t have the right words to explain herself.

Everything changed for Emma when she discovered the Instagram page of Zoe Stoller, a US-based creator, educator, and social worker working to improve the visibility of the LGBTQ+ community. This was the first time Emma encountered the term “abrosexuality.” She recalled, “You know in cartoons when a lightbulb appears above their heads? That’s how it felt when I read their post.” Emma confessed, “Finally, I feel seen.”

She went on to share, “I’m happy to say that the rest of my friends and family have been very supportive of my identity and have strived to learn more. However, even after explaining this, there are still people who demand that I ‘pick a lane’ so that my identity doesn’t offend them. I want people to know that just because you don’t know or understand an identity, doesn’t make it less authentic. But it’s still hard to hear things like, ‘Mate, you’re just confused,’ or ‘Just say you’re bisexual and be done with it.’”

Emma concluded, “I refuse to be boxed in by someone else’s limited knowledge. We’re all learning new things about ourselves all the time — that’s what growth and development is about.”

And here’s a story shared by an internet user, who encountered a big problem in her family, because her husband used some unknown abbreviation while referring to her in a chat with his friends. The woman saw a message where her spouse was calling her “SWMBO”, and when she finally found out the meaning of it, she immediately wanted to file for a divorce.