8 Mistakes You Should Stop Making to Find Your True Love
A study shows that people aren’t as picky as they thought when choosing who to date and have a relationship with. Not only that, but many of them stay in relationships that should have ended a long time ago. A large percentage, about 75% of people, find it difficult to find people who they think meet their criteria. We recognize the struggle, and we think we can help with it.
It’s not mandatory or necessary for everyone to find a life partner, but for those who have trouble finding one, Bright Side has a few pointers on why that is the case.
1. You try to be someone else
Oftentimes, people get carried away by their dates or partners and pretend they like things they don’t. In order to have a successful relationship, you need to accept yourself fully and show it to those around you. Don’t be ashamed of who you are, and don’t try to mirror the other person’s interests and habits. In order to do that, though, you first need to take a good look in the mirror and get to know who you really are and what you’re looking for in life.
2. You set your standards too low or too high
It’s not just okay, but essential to have standards when dating, however, sometimes you set them too low or too high. In the first case, you compromise for something you know will make you unhappy in the future. You may be feeling desperate and want to find a partner right away, but this is the perfect recipe for failure. In the second case, you set your standards so high that almost no one can reach them.
That’s because you’re probably looking for the perfect person, and you should know that this doesn’t exist. You should be looking for someone who has the necessary characteristics for your needs.
3. You are afraid to go on dates and meet new people
Don’t expect that by meeting just one person, you will find the love of your life. The dating scene is a struggle, and you will need to explore it as much as you can in order to figure out what you want. By being open to meeting new people, you will see what bothers you and what you are really searching for. Even if you get rejected from time to time, the lessons you will learn will prove to be very important in the future.
4. You are scared to tell them about your feelings
So, you’ve started a casual relationship with someone and along the way, you realize that you want more from them. It’s okay to let them know about your feelings and, maybe, they feel the same way about you. Even if they don’t, at least you will have made an effort instead of torturing yourself by hiding your feelings. If that happens, this relationship wasn’t meant to be, so you shouldn’t feel discouraged and should instead move on to the next adventure.
5. You ignore the people in your social circle
Sometimes there are people in our circle that give us their full attention, but we don’t think that they want more from us. Maybe you should take a good look at your friends and colleagues and notice who has been there for you without you being there for them the same way. Maybe they don’t see you as just a friend, but they also have feelings for you. We’re not saying that you should push yourself to date them, but take a good look at them and try to see them from a different perspective.
6. You don’t have common interests
Having the exact same interests as your partner might be impossible, but it would be beneficial to have some in common. For example, if they like to be at home all the time, and you like to be out for the entire day, that might be an issue. It’s important to like a few of the same things so that you can hang out together. It will give you something to bond over not only at the beginning of the relationship, but also years later when you might’ve started a family together.
7. You don’t feel respected and valued
It’s vital that your life partner respects you, your life, and the choices you make. They shouldn’t talk down on you or make fun of your job or tell you how stupid your decisions are. This type of behavior is abusive and controlling and not at all respectful. That’s why it’s also important that you find a partner who is interested in your goals and supports you in everything you choose to follow.
8. You don’t love yourself
This is probably the most important step, since you can’t expect someone else to love you if you don’t love yourself. To do that, you have to look at your strengths and weaknesses and think about how you can improve them. There is more to everyone than just areas to improve, and you certainly shouldn’t only concentrate on them. If you do so, your partner will sense it, and you can’t expect them to behave in a respectful way toward you.
The pros of a successful relationship
- Personal growth: everyone feels more certain about themselves when they have someone cheering on them and celebrating their successes. Even if you fail, you know that you have someone that will be there to support and help you get back on your feet.
- Sense of purpose: when you are in a committed and loving relationship, you want to give your everything to your partner. This gives you a sense of purpose and fulfillment, since you know that it’s not all about you, but also about helping others.
- Decreased stress: imagine having the worst day at work and going back home to your loving partner. They can help you calm down and make you forget about your struggles for a while
Have you found your true love and life partner? How long did it take you to find them, and was it easy to build a strong and solid relationship?