10 People Who Realized They Didn't Truly Know Their Partner

Trusting someone in a relationship is becoming harder and harder these days. Whether it’s online catfishing or people generally being manipulative, you need to be more attentive with who you choose to call your girlfriend/boyfriend. Let these people’s stories be your cautionary tales.

1.

My ex always seemed like a genuine person. We dated for three years. She once looked at me dead-serious and said, “I’m the only person you can really trust.” What I didn’t expect was that all this time, she was married.

Not in a falling-apart, separated kind of way—no. Fully married. House, kids, golden retriever. I only found out because her “girl’s outing” overlapped with a friend’s wedding... in the same city. She was there, with him, holding his hand. I didn’t make a scene.

I waited. When I finally confronted her, her voice didn’t shake. She said, “I’ve been waiting for the right time to divorce him. I just needed to know you were real first.” And then she had the audacity to ask, “You still trust me, right?”

2.

I had a new co-worker, and I was really physically in love with her, but I had a GF. I felt all sorts of guilt and decided to confront my GF about it.

I was expecting her to be mad about it, but she just smiled and said, “It’s okay, you can go out with her, just don’t tell me the details.” She could tell I was shocked, and she proceeded to say, “I just don’t want you to leave me over something so trivial.” Safe to say, I broke up with her and never looked back.

3.

We were on the way back from a party. She told me I didn’t praise her enough around people. I was like, “I didn’t think that was necessary.” She then tells me, if I’m in the mood to be contrary, she is going to drop me off on the side of the road and I can walk home.

So I was quiet until I got home. Then I told her to never speak to me again. She called me to apologize, and if I would take her back. I said, “No, my self-esteem is too high to be with someone like you.” © caduceun / Reddit

4.

When I had the day off work, I would do the housework and cook dinner and then sit down and enjoy some gaming time whilst she was at work. Only for her to come home and kick off that I was playing video games all day. Despite having cleaned the entire house and made dinner.

She went to bed and didn’t speak to me for the rest of the evening because she was annoyed. Didn’t even eat any of the food I had made. © Worfs-forehead / Reddit

5.

He treated me like a queen for the first couple of months. Then, things gradually got distant, and he would prioritize gaming with friends than hanging out with me, despite having not seen each other for weeks. When I told him I didn’t like the direction things were going, he said, “No baby, I’ll do better, you mean everything to me!”

And that felt true the two weeks after, until I got a dm from another girl. She sent me a private chat screenshot she had with my BF, and he texted her the exact same sentence verbatim. At least have some creativity, right?

6.

We started out as friends and became partners a few months in. I told him I loved him after about three months into the relationship, but he said he didn’t feel the same way yet. This went on for two more months and I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t stand feeling like I’m being dragged along with no clear future to be seen.

So, I told him we’re done. What hurt the most was his nonchalance after I told him the reason. He didn’t even blink or show any sadness, which made me realize this was a relationship of convenience for him all along.

7.

About a month ago, I met someone that I felt I really hit it off with. We had been seeing each other and would text every day. He was giving me so many green flags and initially was the one to always reach out and make plans. I really thought things were moving in the right direction. My guard was slowly coming down for him.

Then this past week, we were in the middle of making plans to hang out and, out of the blue, I received this long text about how he had been seeing someone else too and wanted to end things with me to pursue her as he felt they had a stronger “romantic connection.” I still feel pretty bummed about it. © Neon_Paisley / Reddit

8.

She was really worried about some of my female friends stealing me away from her. To the point of not allowing me to interact with them, “It’s not that I don’t trust you, it’s that I don’t trust her!”

Yeah, she cheated on me. © Thedoc9 / Reddit

9.

We met when I was 16 and he was 25. We lived together a number of years before we got married. We went together really well, and I thought it was a good match, almost the day after we were married his family decided to set rules.

We weren’t allowed out after a certain time, his mother and father could berate me as much as they pleased. He himself became very controlling, I wasn’t allowed to finish school or work, and he would use these to mock and guilt me after saying I was a burden and a leech, a gold digger. They all decided for me that I would have his children, and we would all stay in the house together.

Soon after, I was taken off birth control, I was no longer allowed out of the house without an escort, I wasn’t allowed to see my mother more than once a week. Everyone thought we were the perfect couple. © Unknown User / Reddit

10.

He was calm. Too calm, honestly. The type who never raised his voice, never got jealous, never even seemed surprised by anything. We dated for a year and a half. He knew all my friends, my routines, my favorite coffee order.

I realized something was off when I mentioned a childhood story I’d never told him... and he finished it. Word for word. Turns out, we didn’t meet by accident. He’d followed my social media for years, built a personality he knew I’d fall for, and “bumped into me” at a bookstore I’d posted about once.

Every inside joke? Scripted. Every moment I thought was spontaneous? Rehearsed. When I confronted him, he just said, “I was patient. You were worth curating for.” I didn’t break up, I evacuated.

Love has a way of clouding judgment, especially when you’re holding on to who you hope someone is, not who they really are. These stories are a reminder that sometimes, the biggest red flags aren’t loud. If there’s one takeaway, it’s this: trust your gut, ask questions, and don’t ignore the weird little things that don’t quite add up. Here’s a run-down of some of those red flags you should be watching out for.