I Excluded My Sister and Her Kids From My Vacation, I Don’t Owe Them Anything

A woman who wanted a peaceful vacation received an awful reaction from her family because of her decision. She needed rest, and babysitting her sister’s kids was not in her plan. But after her vacation trip, the siblings relationship became problematic.

This is the full story:

“This happened when I was 24, and my sister is still annoyed about it and thinks I was wrong. I just want to see if I am or not.

Long story short, I won a raffle at my job for an all-expense-paid family vacation. It wasn’t a super fancy prize to Disneyland or anything crazy. It was just a nice 3-day stay at this little beach house inn. It was for 4 people. I asked my new BF at the time to go, but he couldn’t because of school.

I told nobody I won, but when I came down to visit my family for the weekend, my sister was there with my niece and nephew, who are the most ill-mannered kids I’ve met, thanks to Sis not disciplining them ever.

I love them, but she lets them get into everything and never watches them unless someone (me or our mom) yells at her to get up and watch them. Visiting is always a chore because I end up watching them to give our mom a break. It’s pathetic.”

“I’d considered inviting them to come before I arrived. But the longer I was there, the more I hated the idea. By the time I was packing up to go home, I knew I wasn’t inviting them. She dumped them on me the entire time (like usual), and I knew if they came, it would turn into me babysitting them while she had a vacation.

So I didn’t mention it. The next day, I told my friend Megan because she has two kids (older than Sis’s kids and very well-behaved) and she’s a single working mom who could use the vacation. I offered to invite her along if she would pay for the gas to get us all to/from there, and she happily agreed.

We went, had a blast, I got a pretty good tan, we ate lots of buffet food, and did fun family-type activities all weekend before coming back.”

“I posted some pictures I took (nothing in your face, just a couple cute ones of me/us on the beach). When I got back, and before lunch even rolled around, Sis was blowing up my phone asking how in the world I could afford a vacation. I told her it was a raffle prize, she asked who won, and I said me.

She lost it, demanding to know why I hadn’t invited her. I was honest and said that it’s because I didn’t want to babysit her kids for my entire vacation. She called me rude, said I knew she needed a vacation, and then hung up on me.

Later, Mom called asking why I promised niece and nephew I’d take them on vacation. I said I never told them I would. Turns out Sis told them we were all supposed to go on vacation, but I ruined it, and now they couldn’t. So they sobbed all day.

I explained my side, and Mom said I was mean for not inviting them. But she dropped it after I said I wasn’t babysitting my whole vacation. I could have invited them, but I just didn’t want to.

Sis thinks family should come before friends. Was I wrong?”

People expressed their opinions.

• Sounds like your sister’s idea of parenting is to have someone else do it. She got a break the entire time you were visiting home, and so she has no right to complain.
  If she complains again, remind her that you gave her a break, that you usually do when she’s around, and she dumps her kids on you. That you have to spread the love, and that she’s selfish and self-centered to think you are her babysitter. © elvaholt / Reddit
• Your sister lied to your family to get them on her side, cause she knew your reasoning for not taking her was legitimate. You don’t need her. If she wants to stay mad at you for her inability to be a parent, then she can stay mad.
  You do you. Live your best life. Plus, from the way it sounds, you gave Megan a well-deserved vacation. © GiornoGiovanna03 / Reddit
• You won a contest, you chose to take a friend and her kids because it would be a great time for all involved — it’s not a vacation if you’re babysitting unbehaved kids. Your sister is clearly trying to use you.
  The fact that she told her kids you promised them a vacation and then “robbed” them of it is a HUGE red flag, especially considering it was AFTER the vacation. Seriously consider what kind of relationship you want to have with your sister because it looks like she’s willing to turn her kids against you to get what she wants. © PirateOfTheCCCCCCC / Reddit

A different situation, a different relationship, and a problem. A woman was mocked about her wedding by her cousin. And when she snapped, it was seen in a bad light. Read her story at this link.