My DIL Wanted My Retirement to Be Her Free Daycare, She Wasn’t Ready for My Next Move

So instead of just telling your DIL that you won't babysit every day, you pick up and leave your house weeks early and go to your son's house in another state until it is time to go to Europe. Just how afraid are you of your DIL?

I'm just wondering why Grandma didn't stop her in her tracks right THEN, and simply say.. "Uhh, NO, I will NOT be babysitting ANYBODY'S children, until IF and WHEN, I decide to, and I may NEVER decide to, so you need to make other arrangements just like you HAVE been!"
I am going to enjoy my retirement, and that does not include babysitting full time. I retired for a reason!! And that would be the end of it! NO, is a complete sentence!!

DiL has alot of nerve! You did nothing wrong. Hope she gets used to your schedule while you're in Europe!

DIL is a piece of work. Your son needs to step up in a Big way and squash this in the bud.

Not your children, not your responsibility.
You raised your son and he needs to get a set

Just tell her that you will charge her 4 time more than she would pay to her other babysitter and if. She agreed then make sure that she pay you first if not then tell her (sorry)

Oh h-e-🏒 🏑 no. 40 years of work then more work. You will spend time with them, you just need a little me time first. You will not be her full time babysitter. To your son, wth?

No ma'am. At dinner. Let her know. That while you love the gks. You'll be taking much needed break until further notice. And to please schedule time with gks. Family isn't obligated. The son should've stepped in then and corrected his wife.

I too retired recently. Before my retirement date I informed my 3 kids that I will not be keeping their school aged kids because Im going to do what I want to do with my time right now. If or when I choose to FT babysit my grandkids I will let them know. When your dil made that comment during dinner I would have let her know right there as polite as possible, Im not retiring to keep my grandkids, but if or when that time comes I'll let you know. FIL is the one who's selfish to plan what you should be doing with your life after retirement. Yes, we're the grandparents. NOT THE PARENTS. Its's up to your son and DIL to find a babysitter or afterschool program if the kids are school age. Why do people feel like when grandparents retire they should keep grandkids? A FT babysitter for your grandkids is still a job to me and most of the time it's witjout pay. We retire because we choose not to work anymore. Your DIL is the one who's selfish. Who is she to plan what you should do after retirement? Enjoy your retirement anyway you choose. Your DIL will get over it. If not, oh well.

Tell her you retired from working and that you don't mind spending time with the grandkids but you are not a free babysitter and that you cant afford to feed them daily on your income. Which your trip will be brought up and just say yeah that it's been paid for some time now as it's why you can go and that once you are back that if she wants you to babysit then she can put groceries in your home for the kids.

Just tell her you have bed bugs 🐞

My dear you should had told your daughter in law at the dinner when she mention you babysitting her children . So what if she gets angry. No grandparent is obligated to watch their grandchild or children. It doesn't mean you don't love them This is your time now to breath and relax. To do the things you couldn't do while working and raising your family. Enjoy your life while you can and be happy. Don't allow anyone to make you feel guilty . I would ask my daughter in law why she prefer you than her own mother and do you want an old lady who has slow down to watch over your active children?
Are you that selfish or just lazy.

How is this family standing upright??? NONE of them have spines!!! DIL has balls though. The nerve after PAYING for babysitters for years then to expect her to do it everyday for free??? Wow just wow!

What is wrong with the communication in your family? You sit silent and angry through a meal rather than simply saying 'no, I plan to travel'? There was no reason to accept the children at your door unannounced and no reason not to speak to her directly about her presumptuous, entitled behavior. Sounds like your son can't speak up either. I think maybe some assertiveness and communication training are in order for your entire family.

Your retirement is yours to enjoy! Don't let anyone guilt trip you into giving it up.

Tell your DIL to f.o.

Tell your son, if his wife keep selfish like that, he and his wife don't deserve any inheritance from you.

Your DIL is the selfish one. You didn't work hard all your life just to be saddled with someone else's children. Those kids are your DIL and son's kids. Let them be responsible for them. The next time the selfish woman shows up at your door with the kids bite the bullet and tell her NO and then close the door. Follow thru on your plans for retirement and enjoy yourself.