Go Jessica !
My Sister-in-Law Never Pays Her Share, So I Gave Her a Taste of Her Own Medicine
We’ve all got that one relative who always manages to dodge paying, but what do you do when it’s your sister-in-law? One frustrated woman reached out to us after pulling a bold move to finally stop her sister-in-law from taking advantage of her kindness. She’d had enough and decided to take matters into her own hands, and now she was wondering—did she go too far?
Hello Bright Side!
I really need your advice on how to deal with a tricky family member. I have a sister-in-law who's driving me up the wall, and I'm wondering if I handled the situation the right way or if I went too far.
So, here’s the story. My 28-year-old sister-in-law lives in another city and often visits us. She always stays at our place instead of booking a hotel, and whenever she’s here, she insists on going to fancy restaurants. But there’s a catch – she always “forgets” her wallet or makes up some excuse not to pay. She even hints that since I make more money than her, it should be my job to cover her expenses – not my husband’s, but mine. And yes, I do earn a decent income, but I can’t keep paying for her every single time.
In the past, I’ve just paid the bill and asked her to pay me back, but she never did. Last night, she booked a super expensive restaurant again, and I decided I’d had enough. Here’s where it gets interesting — I pulled a trick I once saw on an episode of my favorite TV show.
Before we left, I made it clear that I wouldn’t be covering her bill this time. As we headed out, I pretended I had forgotten something inside, went back to the room, and found her wallet lying right on top of her suitcase. I put it in my purse without saying anything. When we finished eating, she tried the usual, saying we needed one bill because she’d “forgotten” her wallet. That’s when I pulled it out of my purse and asked, “You mean this wallet?”
She was furious, saying I crossed a line by taking her wallet without asking. And to make matters worse, she saw that I wrote this story for you and is now even angrier, claiming I made her look bad.
All the best,
Jessica.
Thanks for reaching out for help, Jessica. We hope that our advice can give you a fresh perspective on how to handle this situation.
Here’s how you can handle things more easily next time:
- Make her pay first: Suggest activities where she has to pay upfront, like booking tickets for a show. When she’s already spent money, it’ll be harder for her to avoid paying later.
- Choose a cheaper way to do things together: Offer plans that don’t involve expensive dinners. Cook together, watch a movie, or find free events nearby. You’ll still have a good time without spending too much.
- Pick places together: If she likes fancy spots, suggest planning together and say, "I’m on a budget this time. Let’s pick a place that works for both of us." This helps keep things fair.
- Try her trick: Next time, just before leaving, say you forgot your wallet too, and see how she reacts. It might make her realize how it feels!
Even though family should be a source of support, this man shared how his sister-in-law’s attempt to expose a family secret ended up backfiring.
Comments
No, you didn’t go too far. She totally deserved that trick. However, you should have put a stop to it a long time ago and refused to host or go out with her. And where is her sibling in all this? They need to put her in her place. I’m so sick of immediate family feeding into the dysfunctional behavior and letting their spouse take the lead. I could never be married to someone who lacked the backbone to stand up for me and what is right. I wouldn’t sweat it if you never see her again as she is a total leech. 9
I don't think you crossed a line AT ALL! I think you absolutely did the right thing, 100%! And I'm pretty sure what tv show you got it from, 'Two and a Half Men' , am I right? I saw it too, great show!
If she genuinely forgot her wallet.... I am notorious for it. Thanks ADHD.... then when you pulled out her wallet she would have had a good chuckle and thanked you immensely. Her reaction was anger. Meaning it was intentional. I thought you took her wallet and made her cover the entire bill without her knowing. Which would have been crossing the line but also actual payback. Taking her wallet to the restraunt. That's what you feel guilty about?! Oh my, your an angel. Don't feel bad for that. If anything this reveals her true colors. Stay away from people easily angered like that. She is mad she wasn't able to use her manipulative card. Instead she showed her true colors. Pray for your brother. He is probably dealing with that manipulation at home 24/7. She needs help. The professional kind.
Some (insecure) folk like to boast about how good they get it from some source.
Truth is: They are using them!
She sounds like the type of person you DO NOT want in your life, relative or not.
Step away gracefully but always be aware of her true character.