12 Pearls of Wisdom From Kids Who Are As Good at Upbringing As Any Adult

4 years ago

Kids are unpredictable in both their actions and their words and that’s what makes us both happy and upset every day. Just look at the bathtub filled with toilet paper, a bracelet made from spaghetti, or listen to an ’Offendus’ spell and you’ll once again realize that there’s never a dull moment with kids around.

We at Bright Side are very familiar with the difficulties all of us have when raising children and we always have a dozen stories about their tricks. Here are some of the best of them.

My 13-year-old nephew picks up a stick from the ground and says to his 10-year-old sister:

— That’s Harry Potter’s magic wand.

Sister: That’s an ordinary stick.

Nephew: Shall we check? (beats the stick upon her head and casts the spell:)

Sister: Offendus!

It worked. © Cyrteq / Pikabu

  • My 5-year-old daughter and I were getting ready to go to her kindergarten. The morning time is very rushed and each minute counts. So I gave her all her clothes and went outside to walk the dog. When I came back I saw my daughter talking on the phone to her granny and complaining she can’t figure out which way her sweater goes. Granny was desperately trying to explain it to her, but it was all in vain. So my daughter says, “Let me take a pic of it and send it to you.” She knows how to take a pic on the smartphone and send it, but doesn’t know how to put on a sweater. © fochkina / Pikabu
  • My daughter started going to school. She liked it so much that she decided to become a teacher. She collected all her stuffed toys, put them at their improvised desks made of books, gave each of them a notebook and a pen, and started the lesson in a strict voice. At that time, my wife was mopping the floor. She had cleaned the floor in the entire apartment except for our daughter’s room. So she opens the door, enters, and starts to mop. And our kid says the following:
    — Don’t get distracted by the janitor, kids. Let’s continue the lesson. © KostaGrass / Pikabu
  • When it was time for me to start school, my mom tried to get me enrolled in some prestigious mathematical academy. I didn’t get selected. I remember my mom being extremely upset and almost crying on the way home. I decided to calm her down and said:
    -Mom, don’t get upset. I don’t need this super academy. I actually want to become a tram driver! © Alexograf / Pikabu
  • In the morning, my 5-year-old daughter came to my bed to continue her morning sleep. I asked her:
    — You have your own room and your own bed, why don’t you sleep there?
    — Mom, how will I be able to hug you there if you are here?
    I had no good answer... © Poet’s dream / det.org.ru
  • — Kids, what color is the crocodile? asks a kindergarten teacher.
    — It’s red! — says Alex.
    — Why red? — asks the teacher surprisingly.
    — Green! — shout the kids.
    — That’s from outside. — objects Alex.
    The group becomes silent. © Pikabuchkin / Pikabu
  • Today I heard a conversation between 2 little boys who were sitting next to me on the bus. One of them was looking somewhere out the window and said that his parents won’t let him get a dog, and that’s why he is going to keep looking at the sun until he goes blind so that his parents have to get him a guide dog. Kids say / Facebook
  • When my daughter Kira and I were going on a trip, she decided to approach it with all the seriousness possible. Since she, a 6-year-old girl, had a passport, her doll Nastya also needed one. She drew a “photo” and wrote the doll’s full name which she made up by herself.
    So here we are — at border control, there is a serious (and grumpy) woman behind the glass. She takes our passports, mine and Kira’s, and asks a couple of ordinary questions. Then she puts stamps in our passports and asks us to pass. Suddenly Kira says to me, “What about Nastya’s passport?” She was holding it in her hands, ready to give it to the border control officer. I knew that I was supposed to say to my kid that we needed to go — there was a big line behind us, while Nastya will pass anyway. The officer saw our hitch and asked, “What happened?” I was realizing that this could turn out to be a terrible mistake, but we gave her Nastya’s pink passport saying we also have a doll’s passport that needs to be stamped.
    The officer answered, “Let me have a look.” And smiled. Yes, she smiled. She was really looking at Kira’s drawn paper folded in half. In addition, she said, “We will do this according to the rules.” And stamped that pink passport, a doll’s passport, at the border control, where all the officers are cold and serious.
    If it were not for the barrier and the glass, I would’ve kissed that woman all over her face. © Alexey Belyakov / Facebook

What funny stories about kids’ does your family like to remember? Please tell us about them in the comments!

Preview photo credit ElectricBOOTSxo / Reddit

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My 5 year old son likes to play in my hair sometimes. The other day he says last night when I was doing your hair I saw white. Are you young? When his kindergarten class celebrated 100 days of school they dressed up like 100 year olds with white hair and all.

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If my son ever does something like the spider thing I don't know If he will get out of it alive ???

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