14 Retail Moments That Turned an Ordinary Shift Into a Sitcom

Working in a store is not just about receipts and change; it’s a daily test of endurance. Where else would you meet a lady demanding blue petfood to match her kitchen interior, or a customer returning half a grapefruit 2 weeks later? We’ve put together 14 stories from salespeople whose daily lives are like a ready-made script for an absurd comedy. Will you be paying with a card or cash?

• During my college years, I worked part-time at a store. One day, a woman comes in, picks up some groceries, and eventually asks, “Where’s Sonya? Haven’t seen her around for a while.”
  I was new, but I remembered that was the cleaning lady’s name. I said, “Sonya’s on vacation! She went on a trip.” The woman froze. Her eyes widened in disbelief.
  I got nervous. Did I say something I shouldn’t have? Then she slowly pulls out a pouch of Whiskas from her pocket and mutters in confusion, “On vacation? Wow. And I brought her some food.”
  Turns out, Sonya was the neighborhood stray cat, everyone’s favorite. I can’t imagine what was going through that woman’s mind — a cat who filed for time off and flew somewhere!
• I worked as a sales consultant in an electronics store. A girl comes in and says she needs a laptop. She picked the model, and I started processing the purchase, printing out her invoice. I said, “Please proceed to the checkout.”
  She leaves my sight, and I hear her voice — there’s no one at the register. Alright, the cashier must be on break. I sit at the register, accept the payment, print out the receipt, stamp the invoice, and say, “Proceed to pickup.”
  She leaves again, and I hear her voice saying there’s no one there as well. I grab the invoice and head to the storage, pick up the laptop and hand it to her.
  We open it, check it, I receive thanks, and she notices the photo stand with the employee of the month. My photo is up there. She smiles and says, “Are you the best employee because you’re the only one here?” © 4ocuspocus / Threads

• I worked as a sales assistant at a bakery for several years. Customers were mostly the same regulars; they knew me, and I knew them, so we had some inside jokes. Whenever I offered them pastries or cakes, and they were on a diet, I would always say, “If there’s a strong wind, I won’t set the nets out to catch you.” © azaryuna / Threads

• Once, I witnessed a situation at the “Fruits and Vegetables” stand near the metro: an elderly man was demanding a refund for a “rotten grapefruit,” holding the half-eaten fruit right up to the vendor’s nose. Of course, without a receipt. When asked when he bought it, the old man innocently replied that he had bought it 2 weeks ago, ate half, and the rest went rotten. © Natali Natali / ADME
• I was at the register and I kept hearing a chirping noise. I didn’t think much of it and suspected it was somebody’s ringtone going off as it would not have been the first time someone’s phone rang while in line. I continue on and call over the next customers (a man and woman).
  As they get closer the chirping noise gets louder, so making conversation I say to the customers, “What is that chirping noise?” They say, “Oh, that’s our baby chicks. We just got them today and we couldn’t keep them outside because it’s too hot out. Do you want to see them?”
  I obviously say yes because why would I not want to see some baby chicks? Then they present to me, a box of 6 or 7 baby chicks, all different colors. The pure joy I felt when seeing those baby chicks is indescribable. © Low_Sherbert_8373 / Reddit
• I work in a store, in the children’s section. The other day, a grandmother came in with her grandson, about 5 years old. I heard her telling him, “Well, pick something! What do you want?” The little boy instantly rushed to the toy cars, but the grandmother stopped him, ’You already have a whole box of those at home, where will you put more?’"
  Then he went to the puzzles, but she said to him, “You haven’t even completed the old ones yet!” He wandered around for a while and finally stopped at the display with robots. The grandmother sighed and said, “They’ll break by tomorrow, it’s pointless!”
  So they kept circling around, and the grandson finally gave in, asking, “Grandma, so what should I take then?” Without batting an eye, she replied, “Whatever you want! It’s your birthday after all!” I was standing there, barely holding back my laughter. © Mamdarinka / VK

• I’ve been working as a pet store sales associate for many years. One day, a lady all dolled up comes in, acting like she’s running for office. She bought a dog and needs a blue bowl. I found a blue bowl for her and then she started demanding blue food.
  I try to explain to her that there’s no such thing and there can’t be. But she insists, yelling at me, saying she needs only blue food because only blue matches her kitchen’s interior. With great difficulty, she finally left to continue searching for blue food.
  I can’t help but feel sorry for the animal that will only be fed something that matches the owner’s kitchen decor. © Work Stories / VK
• I’m a sales associate at a store. This morning, a dad came in shopping with his daughter. I overhear this conversation, “Dad, do you want chips?” The man shakes his head no.
  The girl stands there with the chips in her hands for about 2 minutes, then walks over to her dad, tosses the chips into the cart, and says, “Well fine, I do!” © Work Stories / VK
• I work as a sales associate in a cosmetics store. A woman came in and asked for a good waterproof mascara. So, I sold her one.
  She comes back a couple of days later, makes a scene, and demands her money back. I try to find out what the issue is.
  Turns out, the mascara is hard to remove! Seriously! When I explained about makeup removers, she called me a horrible person trying to sell her something she doesn’t need, just to get more money. © Overheard / Ideer

• I work in an accessories boutique. Once, a girl with eyelashes reaching the sky and a fur coat on her shoulders came in and took a pair of very expensive gloves. I rang them up and placed them in a large bag, as there were no smaller ones left. She widened her eyes in indignation and asked, “Don’t you have a smaller one?”
  Without thinking much, I grabbed an ordinary transparent bag, put the gloves in it, and then took some tinsel from the table (we were about to decorate the hall) and tied the bag. I handed it to her saying, “Enjoy it.” I tried to hold back my grin with all my strength.
  The entire line of people waiting behind her was stunned, and then my coworker started laughing, and soon the entire boutique joined in. I received both a reprimand and praise from the director. And my coworker made me an award badge “For Victory Over Bad Moods.”
• This guy came up to me and asked, “What’s the difference between cranberry juice and organic cranberry juice?” I was 15 and I knew nothing, so after a pause I replied, “Like.. 8 dollars.” Guy was laughing so much he didn’t even care for a real answer after that. © ****manthatsmyjam / Reddit

• Yesterday, I realized that being a salesperson is probably my calling. I’ve been working in retail since I was 17, and now I’m 32.
  Yesterday, I went to a pharmacy because I wasn’t feeling well. The pharmacist was ringing up everything I asked for. I automatically asked her, “Will you be paying by card or cash?” The pharmacist looked at me in confusion, and I looked back at her, wondering why she was silent.
  Then it hit me... I apologized, and the pharmacist laughed and asked, “When was the last time you had a day off?” Apparently, it’s noticeable that it’s been a while. It’s been 6 months without a day off — perhaps it’s time to take a break. © Work Stories / VK

• I work as a cashier in a supermarket. There’s a woman in the store in the evening, pushing a cart and gathering her groceries. Nothing out of the ordinary, she’s putting in baby food, diapers, cereal.
  And then after a few seconds, she starts rocking the cart like a baby stroller. Apparently, that reflex is well-developed. © Work Stories / VK
• I’m a sales consultant in a big store. It’s hard to say what we specialize in since we have almost everything.
  One day, security comes up to me and tells me to “keep an eye” on a customer: he’s been walking around the store back and forth for half an hour now, maybe he needs help or something? So I head over to that guy.
  Indeed, he’s pacing back and forth — that was suspicious. I approached him and asked if he needed any help. He goes, “Young man, I give up! I can’t find the exit, could you help me?” It happens! © Work Stories / VK

There is a person behind every counter who also needs some kindness. Be kinder and remember: a little humor or a dash of honesty can save even the most hopeless day.
What “gems” from customers or salespeople still make you laugh? We’re looking forward to your stories in the comments!

And these salespeople left an unforgettable impression.