6 Unexpected Things That Secretly Predict a Marriage Won’t Last

We all know the common red flags that spell trouble for a marriage—constant arguing, lack of trust, or infidelity. But what about the subtle, unexpected signs that most people overlook? Research and relationship experts have identified surprising predictors that could quietly signal a marriage is on shaky ground, long before major problems arise.

1. “Hollywood romance” at the beginning of the relationship

A whirlwind romance may seem like the perfect start to a lasting marriage, but research suggests otherwise. Couples who begin their relationships with over-the-top passion and fairytale-like intensity often struggle to maintain that level of excitement over time.

When the honeymoon phase inevitably fades, these pairs may feel disillusioned, mistaking natural relationship evolution for a loss of love. Ironically, marriages that start at a slower, steadier pace—without the cinematic drama—tend to have stronger foundations and a better chance at longevity.

2. Avoiding conflict

It might seem like avoiding arguments is a sign of a healthy relationship, but in reality, it can be a silent marriage killer. Sweeping problems under the rug doesn’t make them disappear—it allows resentment to build over time.

If you’re constantly swallowing your feelings to keep the peace, you might be sacrificing your own needs and emotional well-being, which can ultimately erode the foundation of your marriage.

3. If you marry too young.

Age can play a major role in marital success. Research from the University of Utah suggests that the ideal age range for tying the knot is between 28 and 32, as people in this window tend to have a more mature understanding of commitment.

Those who marry too young often enter into marriage before they fully grasp what it entails—whether it’s managing finances, navigating conflicts, or simply understanding their own personal growth. While some young couples make it work, rushing into marriage without a strong sense of self can increase the likelihood of divorce down the line.

4. Not implementing “sleep divorce.”

Sharing a bed may seem like a non-negotiable part of marriage, but for some couples, it can actually be a source of tension. Differences in sleep schedules, snoring, or restlessness can lead to poor sleep, which in turn fosters resentment and irritability.

Many experts recommend “sleep divorce,” or sleeping separately, as a practical and healthy solution for couples struggling with nighttime disruptions. Despite its misleading name, this practice isn’t a sign of marital trouble—it’s a way to ensure both partners get the rest they need to function happily together during the day.

5. Contempt for your partner

Few things are as toxic to a marriage as contempt. When one partner consistently speaks or acts from a place of superiority—whether through sarcasm, insults, or dismissive body language—it chips away at the foundation of mutual respect.

Rolling your eyes, scoffing, or making degrading comments may seem minor at the moment, but these behaviors signal deeper resentment. According to relationship experts, contempt is one of the strongest predictors of divorce, as it poisons communication and makes reconciliation increasingly difficult.

6. You no longer look forward to being together.

Marriage isn’t just about love—it’s about friendship, companionship, and genuinely enjoying each other’s company. While it’s normal for couples to have independent hobbies and alone time, a major red flag is when one or both partners start actively avoiding spending time together.

If you no longer look forward to date nights, conversations, or even casual moments with your spouse, it’s often a sign of emotional disconnect. Without shared interests or a desire to be around each other, the relationship can start to feel more like a burden than a partnership.

Job interviews are already nerve-wracking, but what if recruiters were secretly testing you in ways you didn’t even realize? Enter the “Chair” Method—a subtle but revealing tactic hiring managers use to assess candidates without them knowing.