My Husband Refuses to Pay for My Son’s Education for a Petty Reason

7 months ago

Splitting finances in a family, especially in a blended one, can be tough. Kate, one of our readers, reached out to us about her husband’s refusal to contribute to her son’s college tuition. Instead, he spends money on what Kate considers less important things.

Mawr Derr

7 months ago

Just another reason to not get into serious relationships with moms.

It is right

When Paul said I do, Jude became his responsibility. Regardless of what his biological, does or doesn't do you became his father when you married his mother. Did Jude get an expensive car for his 16th birthday ? Probably not. For any 16 year old kid a new expensive car is foolish and wasteful. For someone who is just learning how to drive, a good running, inexpensive, economical car is all they need.

Mawr Derr

7 months ago

Steven Farrow

Everything you said is 100% your opinion. No, you dont become a kids parent by marrying their parent. Had he disciplined Jude, you best bet the mom would have been mad. When they divorce, he has no legal ties to Jude at all. Did Jude get an expensive car? Who knows, and who cares. Everything else I agree with, but just because thats all they need, doesn't mean thats all they get. Maybe dad wants to spoil his daughter, so what?

We appreciate you reaching out to us, Kate! Here are some suggestions we think might help you navigate through this situation.

Have a conversation with your son about his future.

It’s best not to burden Jude with the financial details; that’s not something he needs to worry about. Instead, have a gentle conversation with him about his future plans—his interests in majors and universities. This discussion can strengthen your relationship with him and provide valuable insights. With this information, you and your husband can better plan for tuition payments within a realistic range.

Create a budget and find a middle ground.

Have a conversation with Paul about a detailed financial strategy covering both Jude’s education and his daughter’s birthday present. Brainstorm different ideas, like creating a savings account for Jude’s college fund while budgeting for the car.

Emphasize the importance of investing in Jude’s education for his future opportunities, while also recognizing the value of commemorating special occasions for his daughter.

Consider reaching out for legal advice and guidance.

Since Paul mentioned that Jude is no longer his responsibility after turning 18, it’s essential to consult with a legal expert to understand what this means for Jude’s guardianship and financial support.

Discussing legal options can help clarify Jude’s rights and ensure his educational needs are addressed. This may involve exploring legal obligations regarding financial support or finding other ways to fund his education. Gaining insight into the legal aspects of the situation can help you advocate for Jude’s well-being and explore available resources to support him.

Ask for support.

Don’t hesitate to connect with your relatives, friends, and local community resources for help and guidance. Talk to other parents and educational groups to investigate potential scholarships, mentorship opportunities, or part-time job options that could assist Jude with his college expenses.

By creating a support system for Jude, you’ll not only receive practical aid but also emotional comfort during this tough period. Moreover, involving your broader community can aid in advocating for Jude’s educational opportunities and gathering backing for his future endeavors.

Being a parent isn’t always easy, and Sonia, one of our readers, recently shared her experience with us. She explained how her daughter spends time weekends with her father and his new spouse. However, one day, her daughter returned home very upset, and Sonia was shocked to hear what had happened while she was away.

Preview photo credit kues1 / Freepik