I Can’t Believe What My Ex-Husband Asked Our Daughter to Do

Family & kids
3 months ago

Imagine the shock and concern you’d feel if your child came to you upset because something important to them had been taken away. That’s exactly what Sonia experienced when she learned that her 7-year-old daughter had been moved to a different bedroom at her dad’s house. Sonia felt like her world was turned upside down, and she was desperate to protect her daughter from any harm. So, she reached out to us for guidance.

I would call my attorney and set a case of child abandonment ( cause that is what she felt when told she was NOT as important as the teenage who will be leaving very soon for college - not his young daughter that is not even out of Elementary school.

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Hey Sonia! Thanks for reaching out to us. We understand that this is a tough situation for you, but we’re here to help. We’ve put together some advice that we hope will be useful for you as you deal with this challenge.

Support Taylor and let her express herself.

Create a supportive atmosphere where Taylor feels comfortable sharing her feelings. Encourage her to talk openly with her dad and stepmom about how she’s feeling about the changes in her living arrangements.

Remind her that her thoughts and emotions matter, and she has the right to be heard when decisions are made about where she stays. By showing Taylor that her feelings are valid and that she has a say in what happens, we can help her feel more confident and respected in her family situation.

Consider scheduling sessions with a family therapist.

You might want to propose the idea of family therapy sessions to help everyone in the blended family better understand and deal with their emotions. A therapist can guide discussions about boundaries, expectations, and conflicts, which can lead to greater empathy and understanding among family members. These sessions can also offer Taylor a safe place to talk about her feelings with the help of a professional.

Look into legal options to address the situation.

Considering the delicate nature of Taylor’s situation, it could be helpful to seek advice from a family lawyer. They can offer insights into your legal rights. This includes whether any changes made by her father and stepmother adhere to custody agreements or parental rights.

Legal assistance may become essential to safeguard Taylor’s well-being and ensure her stability. By consulting a lawyer, you can take steps to protect Taylor’s best interests and uphold her sense of security during this challenging time.

Make the best of what you’ve got.

If things are going to remain as they are, don’t let it get you down. Instead, focus on helping Taylor adjust to the change. Get involved in decorating her new room together and consider buying some new furniture or items she’s been wanting. This way, you can turn this challenging situation into a positive experience by creating happy memories together and enjoying each other’s company.

Dealing with the intricacies of a blended family can be really tough sometimes. Sandra, who is a mom, was really upset when she found out that her husband didn’t want her daughter to come to his birthday party just because his own daughter from a previous relationship would be there too. If you want to know more about what happened, you can check out Sandra’s story.

Preview photo credit Skyler Ewing / Pexels

Comments

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Why should the big room go to a young child visiting on weekends, and the permenant resident teenager be in a small room? Yes, OPs daughter is upset, but that doesn't mean Dad is wrong - he has to balance the needs of his stepdaughter and biological daughter. Let her vent and be upset, but remind her that she's not an only child anymore, and has to share her Dad's house with her stepsister now. Also, point out that she has two rooms- one at each house. Suggest redecorating the new room to make it 'hers' but don't encourage her to be a spoilt brat.

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Talk to a lawyer because her child has been moved to a different bedroom whe she visits her father? You have to be kidding. Of all the ridiculous suggestions...

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Honestly I'd do the same thing. Firstly because as your young daughter most probably has most of her stuff at your home as it's her primary residence. Secondly they are correct. An older teen who lives there full time has more stuff.

Instead of going nuclear, talk to your ex and ask him if he can get involved with making the smaller room into her own. For example, taking her to the hardware store and letting her choose wall colour for her own room. Allowing her to choose what she wants on the walls, whether it's photos or posters or maybe shelves with toys or pretty stuff on them.

Get him to reassure her that she is still everything to her and love her. Maybe take just her on outings together at the weekends.

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