My Husband’s Unexpected Demand Is Pushing Our Marriage to the Brink

A young woman, Annabel, reached out to us, desperate for guidance after her husband delivered a shocking ultimatum. He suddenly demanded they sign a postnuptial agreement — one that would leave her with little financial security if their marriage ever ended. Now, Annabel is facing an impossible choice: agree to his unfair terms or prepare for a divorce she never wanted.

Here’s her story:

After watching several friends endure long, bitter divorces, my husband suddenly announced that he wants us to sign a postnup. He says it’s for “protection,” explaining that our marriage is like a “limited liability partnership” with no “out clause.” He insists on putting a “stop loss” in place — like he’s managing one of his stock market investments. Then came the ultimatum: he doesn’t want to stay in this “contract” — our marriage — unless I agree to the postnup.

We’ve been married for four years and have a toddler together. His proposal would leave me with only 20 percent of his financial assets and no claim to the house, since he owned it before our marriage. We live in a state where assets are typically divided equitably, but this agreement would be anything but fair. I work, though I earn only about two-thirds of what he does. I consulted an attorney, who bluntly told me the deal is “total nonsense” and that I should absolutely not sign it.

When I confronted my husband with this, he gave me a chilling choice: sign the postnup or face divorce papers. What hurt even more was his casual attitude about it all. He claims this isn’t about his feelings for me or our son, and even suggested that we could continue living together post-divorce if necessary.

I’m heartbroken. I love the life we’ve built, and we’d even been discussing having a second child not long ago. But it’s clear that his priority is protecting his growing wealth — not our family. Now, I’m stuck between losing the marriage I treasure and accepting terms that could leave me financially vulnerable. I just don’t know how to move forward.

What Anabel can do in her situation.

Dear Anabel, navigating your husband’s ultimatum regarding a postnuptial agreement is undoubtedly challenging. It’s essential to approach this situation with both emotional insight and practical steps. Here’s what can assist you:

Understand the motivation behind the request.

Initiate an open and honest conversation with your husband to delve into his reasons for proposing the postnuptial agreement. Is he influenced by external factors, such as witnessing friends’ divorces, or are there specific concerns about your relationship? Understanding his motivations can provide clarity and may reveal underlying issues that need addressing.

Reflect on your own interests.

Take time to assess your feelings and interests concerning the agreement. Consider how the proposed terms align with your financial security and personal values. It’s crucial to ensure that any agreement respects your rights and contributions within the marriage.

Seek independent legal counsel.

Consulting with a family law attorney is vital. An experienced lawyer can explain the legal implications of the postnuptial agreement, ensuring that your rights are protected and that the terms are fair. They can also advise on the agreement’s enforceability and any potential pitfalls.

Ensure full financial disclosure.

For a postnuptial agreement to be valid, both parties must fully disclose their financial situations. This includes all assets, liabilities, income, and expenses. Transparency is essential to prevent future disputes and to ensure the agreement is legally binding.

Consider mediation.

If direct discussions become challenging, mediation can be a valuable tool. A neutral third-party mediator can facilitate conversations, helping both partners express their concerns and work toward a mutually acceptable agreement. Mediation fosters collaboration and can preserve the relationship’s integrity.

This is another story — one of betrayal, deception, and a woman who refused to be fooled. When Emma married Matt, she believed in their love. But her world shattered when she uncovered his infidelity — only, it wasn’t with another woman.