Why Choosing to Be Alone Isn’t Shameful, but a True Act of Self-Love

In 1960, about 10% of adults had never been married. In 2012, this number grew to 20%. Still, even today, single people are often seen as failures or antisocial weirdos. But being alone is often a choice and an act of care for themselves.

Here at Bright Side, we want to explain why some people choose to be single, and why it’s just as good as having a partner.

We don’t want to feel bad about ourselves.

In a society that still values family and marriage, single people often get frowned upon. From childhood, we learn that everyone expects us to grow up, get married, and have kids. People who happen to not want these things to become stigmatized, and they can feel a lot of pressure from their relatives and even strangers.

Many think that there’s something wrong with you if you’re single. So people try not to be “wrong” and will often prefer an abusive relationship over solitude because it’s more socially acceptable. However, it is way better for a person to step out of an abusive relationship and live happily on their own rather than stay in a toxic environment just because of someone else’s opinion.

There’s a difference between being alone and being lonely.

While some might call a single person “lonely,” it’s often not the case. Loneliness is a state a person doesn’t necessarily choose, and they remain socially excluded. For them, their own company isn’t enough. A lonely person is looking for intimacy and feels a need for it, but can’t find it.

A person, who is alone, chooses to be this way, and they can be perfectly fine not sharing their life with someone. They prefer to enjoy their own company, have hobbies and interests, and have friends as well. A study showed that lonely people were not satisfied with their life, unlike people who chose to be alone.

Being alone contributes to your growth as a human being.

Psychologists say that it’s very important to learn to be in harmony with yourself. Without having a healthy relationship with yourself in the first place, it’s not possible to have healthy relationships with others. Embracing solitude, singles are more open to growth and development than married people are. That’s because the latter often rely a lot on their partner who can start to define them to some extent.

For some people, being single is a way to live their life to the fullest. People who are comfortable being on their own usually rely on themselves and trust the inner voice that guides them. It gives them a lot of freedom and the opportunity to think about themselves and their needs rather than someone else’s. Also, they can make better choices because they don’t have an outside influence.

There are benefits to living a solitary life.

  • Single people are less stressed.
  • Single people value meaningful work. They usually have a job that they’re passionate about because they relied on themselves and their heart when they chose it.
  • They’re more productive. They have fewer distractions and, therefore, can focus on their tasks better. Also, alone time helps them to connect to their imagination and get creative.
  • Single people aren’t tied to one place, so they have more opportunities for travel and exploration. They’re free to choose where they want to live or where they vacation.
  • study found that single people are more attentive to their friends and family than married people. That’s because they learned to fully understand themselves, and it helps them to understand the needs and actions of others too.
  • People who live on their own are more self-sufficient. And this leads them to have fewer negative emotions because they get to know themselves.

Are you a lone wolf or a family person?


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I actually agree with most of these. Why all of a sudden being alone is seen as such a negative thing?


I have been single for 3 yrs now and have loved every single second of it. I've heard of ppl that have been shamed for not being in a relationship and or not having kids when they are older and I'm 1 of those lucky older women that haven't had that experience at all. I have no kids and haven't got a partner and I'm truly happy with my decision, still at 35


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