15 People Who Stopped Tolerating Toxic Friendships and Started Living Freely

Friendships should be a support, a space for trust and growth, but sometimes the people we love the most become a burden. Those friendships that drain you, criticize you incessantly, or are only there when they need something from you. Breaking these bonds is not easy, but there are times when cutting off a toxic friend is one of the most liberating decisions we can make. In this article, we explore the experiences of those who, after a long period of toleration, decided to end relationships that only brought them suffering. If you have ever felt trapped in a friendship that is not serving you, these stories will sound familiar.

• I had a friend who constantly asked why there was so much drama in her life, but refused to do anything about it except complain and add more. She had an on/off boyfriend, but dated other people who were in relationships. Refused to admit it was mean of her.
  
  She would constantly try to pick fights with people, talk bad about random girls, and if something didn’t go the way she wanted it to, she would make snide remarks and tweet about it. Overall, she just wasn’t a good person and it took me the longest time to let her go because I kept making excuses or validating her. I finally broke up with her after her birthday because she told me I ruined everything by not wanting to go clubbing with her friends (even though I offered to do literally everything else with her). Hanging out with her only consisted of things she wanted to do or chores she had to do. She was always talking about celebrity gossip or how the boy she was dating posts family photos of his daughters and the mother of his children.
  
  I didn’t need that negativity in my life, so as soon as she tried to argue with me again about the birthday thing, I shut her out of everything. It felt great. @lilpuddycat / Reddit
• I once had a friend who literally texted my then-boyfriend to tell him to cancel our dates because she wanted me to spend that time talking to her online. (He didn’t, and he seemed to think she was kidding. She wasn’t.) I lied on Valentine’s Day weekend and said I had to go to a relative’s funeral so I’d be offline, and I still got a guilt-tripping email about not being around to talk. @blueeyesredlipstick / Reddit
• I was friends with a girl in middle school and high school that my mom always questioned because she was “so into drama.” I’ll call her A. We reconnected after college and basically formed a BFF group with two other friends, B and C. We were all inseparable. But A, unfortunately, continued to make everything about her. When we would plan a night out, she would reject places because she didn’t like them. But if someone rejected her choice, she’d whine and complain. We tended to just go where she wanted because it was easier. If someone couldn’t make it to something, it was no big deal to her, but if she couldn’t go, she would make us reschedule. One time she was seeing a guy who was friends with B’s boyfriend. The four of us got pretty close to this group of guys. When he ended the relationship, she would whine if any of the rest of us hung out with the guys (even though B was still dating one of them). She got mad that we never invited her, even though she definitely didn’t want to spend time with her ex-fling. The last straw was when she stopped talking to B and C because they were hanging out with the guys one night. I wasn’t there, but I got the silent treatment, too. She expected all of us to apologize to her, even though she had done nothing wrong. We all decided to cut her out of our lives and honestly became much stronger friends as a result. @OutdoorFreshScent / Reddit

• I was friends with this guy for 23 years. We met when I was 5 and he was 4 at a karate dojo, then again at school that same year. We hit it off and were basically inseparable for 10 years. We hung out every weekend and for 6 of those 10 years he lived at my house for the entire summer break. But things changed a bit when we were in high school. I went through a bit of mental and physical health trouble, and he (rightfully) started hanging out with other people, got a girlfriend, and joined his school’s football team. The biggest problem from that point on was that neither of us really had time to hang out. And eventually we just stopped talking to each other. I think we still considered each other friends, or maybe that was just on my side, who knows.
  
  Anyway, I got invited to his wedding... two days before it was supposed to happen. I didn’t even know he was engaged. But I was happy for him, and I still considered him my friend, so I asked, “What’s the dress code?” And, he told me to just wear jeans “or something like that.” I thought that was kind of weird, but okay. So, on the day of the wedding, my GF and I showed up in jeans, long-sleeved shirts (a hoodie in her case)... And, to everyone’s ridicule, we discovered that everyone was dressed in what I would call “formal” attire. I heard people asking who we were. His mother, a woman who has literally known me since I was 5 years old and called me “son” more times than I can count, wanted nothing to do with me. And every time I tried to talk to her, she’d wrinkle her nose and walk away after a few words. And my “friend” didn’t even speak to me the whole time we were there.
  
  That was the last time I thought of them as my family. The 23-year friendship is over, and I don’t answer their messages anymore. @ReWighting / Reddit
• When I was in high school, I hung out with a lot of guys. They were all pretty cool. They were the kind of guys who would not like to go to a school event, let alone a football game. I, on the other hand, love football. So after days of trying to convince one of my friends, he said yes. On the day of the game, he said he was going down the street with his cousin to get some food and would be back. I waited for a good hour. I called him and he said he was still waiting for the food (it was a small restaurant at the end of the school and everyone went there on Fridays after school). I said okay and asked if they wanted me to go in and get us seats. He said no, that I should just wait. The game started. I called and he said he was almost there. I heard the band (one of my favorite parts). But when I called out to him in desperation, he laughed in the cruelest way and said he was at the game the whole time. I hung up, went to the school bathroom and cried. @mr_crabs8*** / Reddit
• My father died. I asked some of my friends if they wanted to spend the night playing video games. I told them I didn’t want to have a big party. They said it was cool, which was fine with me. But when I got there, they had invited a bunch of people to a big house party. Then they got mad because I was “just sulking on the couch.” Our friendship never recovered, and now we don’t talk at all. @Responsible-Onion860 / Reddit

• We have been friends for over 40 years. Friends since childhood. We went into business together and he completely screwed me over, took most of the money and left me in crushing debt. Years later I asked him why he did it. His answer: “Because you’re an atheist. You deserve everything you get.” And that was that. @Virtual-Werewolf-310 / Reddit
• In 2018, I got really sick with kidney failure and was in and out of the ER multiple times before I was finally diagnosed with CKD. But my friend didn’t like that “I was getting a lot of attention” from our other friends and people in our small town, so she decided to go around school and lie to people that I was lying about being sick and just wanted attention. When I finally got better and was actually home for more then a few days, she came over with some of her friends and laughed and tried to embarrass me in front of them, trying to get me to say that I was actually lying about being sick. Wasn’t until I pulled out all the meds I was on and proved that I was yellowish in the skin (it was obvious if you actually looked at my eyes). I embarrassed her in front of everyone, she cried and played the victim. She ran out of the house and haven’t spoken to her since. @lilwolfie420 / Reddit
• I had a friend who only wanted to talk when she had problems, and me being a good person would listen to her and offer advice (which she never took). She would never ask me how I was doing or if I joined to talk about my problems she would put me on speakerphone and go to FB. Overnight, she stopped talking to me (she did when she started friending someone else), so I decided enough was enough and stopped taking calls. Six months went by and I got a note on my door saying she was “worried” about me and had “tried” to contact me. She had called me twice and sent me several text messages. (I have severe depression and she said she tried to see how I was doing, but she never actually asked me how I was doing in those messages). But not content with that, she basically showed up at my house with her mother and I had no choice but to talk to her since she was banging on my door and window. I saw her quite a bit for about 2 months and then all of a sudden she stopped calling and texting me again. I haven’t seen her since February last year and I am happier for it. I have cut people out of my life who treated me like a doormat and were toxic. I have never been happier. @Unknown author / Reddit

• My friend was trying to talk to my ex-wife during our divorce. My ex and I had a smooth divorce and we are still friends and co-parents to this day, but she was telling me that he was texting her and asking her to go out for dinner. She had asked him to stop, but my friend had not. When I decided to confront him about it, he lied to my face, so I showed him the screenshots my ex-wife had sent me. Then, totally offended, the guy simply told me to go away and blocked my number. We haven’t spoken in 4 years. That was the only downside to my divorce. @jcamp088 / Reddit
• I was constantly there for someone who couldn’t be there for me, for whatever reason. She was going through a lot mentally and I tried to be there for her, even if it was just giving her space. But little by little she started to push me away. I was doing everything I could to salvage our 10+ year friendship while she was making no effort. And even though I tried on several occasions to communicate with her about what was wrong with her, she kept assuring me that it wasn’t me, it was something with her. I tried my best to spend time with her, but she kept telling me that she wasn’t in the best mood to go out, even though she always went out with other friends. So after almost a year of this, I told her I was done and she just replied that it was okay, no problem. But then the horror began: I later found out on social media that I had become a big bad guy and a terrible person. I cut her out of my life and blocked her on all my social media and my phone because I never wanted to hear from her again. My life is better now that I’m not basically begging for someone’s friendship. @DocGerbilzWorld / Reddit
• Was really good friends with this chick for 13 years. She started getting serious with her current boyfriend about 3 years ago. She had a stroke and I went to visit her. I texted her about a week after, she never responded. I texted her Merry Christmas a few weeks later, she never replied. A few weeks after that I wished her a happy birthday. She didn’t respond again. I figured she was just going through her typical relationship where she drops off the face of the earth for a while and I have her space. But a year goes by, and again I text her a happy birthday... no response. I thought she was just drifting apart. Suddenly, in July, her sister texts me and says she doesn’t know what happened between me and my friend, but asks if I can reach out to her. I explained what happened and then she stopped responding. Two months ago, my friend posted a rare Snapchat and I messaged her saying I missed her and hoped she’s okay. She messaged me a few hours later and said “you stopped talking to me.” I have a timestamped text with no reply. I wanted to send it to her and try to defend myself, but I thought it would just be drama. I tried to reach out, she never did, but blames me. Frustrating, a little disappointing, but just stupid. As good and long of a friendship as we had, I would think I’d get a friendlier response. @redfever3993 / Reddit

• In high school I was friends with the typical “nice guy.” At one point he confessed that he had feelings for me. I turned him down, but he was okay with it and we decided to stay friends. Friends for two years until I started dating someone else. Then he started bringing up my relationship every time we went out, asking things like, “Why him and not me?” But the straw that broke the camel’s back was when we had a fight one night because “I was wrong for not wanting to be with him romantically” and when I left, he followed me to my car when I tried to leave and wouldn’t let me go out again. So I told him that the friendship was over. He didn’t speak to me again until we graduated, where he told me that I had “ruined his senior year.” Granted, it was high school, but I hoped he realized how stupid it was back then. @ionome / Reddit
• He was going to be homeless and I was doing everything I could with what little I had to try to help him. He had been homeless before and had told me that anything was a luxury compared to that and that he didn’t care if he had to sleep on the floor as long as he had a roof over his head. Fast forward a few days and he’s sending me screenshots of train tickets and housing that friends in AZ are offering (several hundred dollars worth) and telling me that my offers are offensive and insulting. After that, he stopped messaging me for a few weeks. I wrote to him, told him I didn’t like being dumped on like that, and blocked him everywhere. Last night he sent me a friend request on a new FB account, saying he thought he had “waited long enough” and didn’t want to poke the bear before things calmed down. He offered no apology, and when I went after him for the audacity, he told me he thought I owed him one. Suffice it to say, he’s blocked again. @River_Atkinson / Reddit
• I had been friends with this girl since we were 8 years old. There was a time when we were inseparable. Looking back, she used to make a lot of nasty comments all the time, trying to pass it off as a joke, using me for her car, and often having group gatherings where she deliberately did not invite me. We were about 18 or 19 when I got her a job interview at the place where I worked. She ended up becoming a shift supervisor and it all went to her head. She started trying to hang out with me more and started trying to butter me up to get all the gossip about the rest of the employees to report back to the GM. The GM was incredibly unprofessional and wanted to know which employees were dating, who was friends with who, and all the gossip that was being said. I found out pretty quickly, so I started lying to her. I was almost done with school at that point, so I knew I wouldn’t see her again when I was done with this job. She stopped asking for staff gossip after I told her some whoppers that couldn’t be true. She definitely found out. I cut her out of my life like a bad habit. Best thing I’ve ever done for myself. The icing on the cake is that she fully believes I reported their relationship to regional management (if you’re a manager, you can’t date anyone else in the location you’re in, not even another manager. She was dating another shift manager and everyone knew it). She and her boyfriend were on vacation at the same time. The assistant manager expressed to me that he thought it was odd and I told him they were together and the GM knew. I guess he reported it to regional management. She absolutely deserves every bit of karma that has been dished out to her. @QU33NK00PA21 / Reddit

Ending a toxic relationship can be complicated, but it is a necessary step for our mental and emotional peace. After all, surrounding ourselves with people who support and respect us is crucial to healthy growth. If these stories made you think, we encourage you to read this other article to continue learning how to protect yourself from harmful relationships.