5 Types of Potential Partners Who Seem Nice but Might Actually Be Red Flags

In the world of dating, it’s easy to be charmed by someone who presents themselves as kind, considerate, and always available. However, beneath the surface, these traits can sometimes mask deeper issues. One of our readers, Kayla H., recently shared her red flag story.

He seemed great, until he didn’t.

I met this guy, let’s call him Greg, and everything seemed perfect. He was sweet and attentive, always texting to check in and making plans. It felt like we were already a couple. But then, when I asked him where it was going, he clammed up real quick and told me, “Let’s not label things.”

I didn’t know how to respond. He wanted all the benefits of a relationship but without any of the responsibility. And it’s not like I was reading into things. He was so affectionate and loving. He had no problem telling me he loved me, but he couldn’t call me his girlfriend.

I tried to brush it off, but the red flags were all too clear. He wanted me to be there when he wanted me, but he wasn’t willing to offer me any sort of commitment. It took me a few days, but I finally walked away. His “nice guy” act was just that, and I wasn’t falling for it anymore.

How to spot someone who exhibits red flag behaviour.

Dear Kayla, we’re so glad to hear you recognized the red flag before things went too far. It’s a reminder that while charm and sweetness can feel great in the moment, they can’t replace the foundation of mutual respect and commitment. It’s easy to get swept up in someone’s attention, but when it comes to relationships, consistency and openness are key.

To help others who might find themselves in a similar situation, we’ve outlined 5 types of potential partners who seem perfect at first but could be hiding red flags. These behaviors may seem harmless initially, but they can quietly lead to bigger issues down the road.

1. The love bomber.

This individual showers you with excessive affection and attention early in the relationship. While it may feel flattering, love bombing is often a manipulation tactic to gain control and establish dependency. True love develops gradually, with mutual respect and understanding. If someone is moving too fast, it might be a red flag.

2. The one who becomes resentful when not rewarded.

Kind gestures should come without expectations. However, some individuals may display resentment when their acts of kindness aren’t reciprocated in the way they desire. This behavior can be emotionally manipulative, turning genuine affection into a transaction. If someone makes you feel guilty for not showing appreciation in the way they expect, it’s a sign to proceed with caution.

3. The person who pretends their control is care.

A partner who constantly checks in or expresses concern about your whereabouts and activities might present themselves as caring. However, this behavior can be a form of control. Healthy relationships are built on trust and respect for each other’s autonomy. If someone’s concern feels more like surveillance, it’s important to recognize it as a potential red flag.

4. The person who always has to tell you how nice they are.

You’ve probably met him: the guy who frequently reminds you of how nice he is. While self-awareness is important, constantly stating one’s niceness can be a tactic to deflect criticism and avoid accountability. Genuine kindness is evident through actions, not repeated declarations. If someone feels the need to convince you of their goodness, it might be worth questioning their true intentions.

5. The one who’s always available.

At first, it might seem flattering when someone drops everything to spend time with you. However, a partner who is always available and lacks personal interests or friendships can indicate a lack of independence. Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect and personal growth. If your partner has no life outside of you, it could lead to feelings of suffocation and dependency.

Recognizing these red flags early can save you from entering a relationship that may not be as healthy as it seems. For more insights into potential warning signs in relationships, consider this article about the 11 Red Flags You Should Keep Your Eyes Peeled For When You Are in a Relationship.