I Ditched My Stepmom, Who Raised Me From My Childbirth, In Favor of My Bio Mother

Family & kids
month ago

A woman, named Sarah, penned a heartfelt letter to our editorial. Sarah is torn by the sense of guilt that she’s feeling towards her stepmom, because the woman feels that she’s mistreated the person, who raised her like her own daughter. But at the same time, Sarah feels she had no other choice, because her biological mom showed up during the most significant event in her life. The woman gave us the details of this intricate family story, leaving it to our readers whether to judge her or to support her with a piece of good advice.

Sarah’s stepmother has always been the most significant person in her life.

Sarah, 26, has written a very emotional letter to our editorial. The woman told us her story, which provoked a hurricane of emotions among a lot of people. Sarah confessed that many family members and friends, and even distant relatives, are now severely judging her for her deed. But the woman feels like there’s a grain of truth in her actions, too, and she explained her position in her story.

Sarah opened her letter, saying, “Hi, Bright Side! I am in a very controversial situation at the moment and I do need the opinions of your readers about my family case. My stepmother, Irene, is 56 years old. This woman has always been like a mother to me. She’s been raising me since I was 4, and she has never even mentioned that we’re not related by blood, though I knew from the very beginning that she’s not my biological mom.
Irene has always been the best mom I could ever have. She’s a generous and loving woman, who has always been by my side when I needed her. She worked hard to support me throughout my life, she was the person who earned money with only one goal, and this was my happy childhood and financially protected future.”

Sarah added, “My dad and my bio mom split when I was 3, and I hadn’t even heard of Alyson, my mother, ever since. When I became grown up enough to be able to ask questions about my biological mother, my dad would always avoid talking about her, he would only call her an ’unworthy person’ and I could see it by the expression on his face, that their breakup was hurtful and dad was still raging because of it.”

Sarah’s biological mother showed up unexpectedly, and turned the life of the whole family into a mess.

Sarah goes on with her story, saying, “When I say that my stepmother was the only person to raise and support me financially, I literally mean it, because my father died in a bad accident when I was 6 years old. Since then, Irene has been the only breadwinner in our family.
My biological mom wasn’t in the picture all this time, and she didn’t even come to dad’s funeral. So, I was living all this time being aware of her existence, but I didn’t really know where she was, what she was up to, and I never made any attempts to find out more details about her. Something inside me always prompted to me that if dad was so hurt by their divorce, then I might also feel the same if I ever find my mother and find out the details of their story.”

Sarah added, “In the meantime, my life was going on. Irene paid for my education and I graduated with honors from a prestigious university. She accumulated the funds that she inherited from her parents and her own savings and bought me a small but nice apartment in the center of the city where we live.
Then, I met my husband-to-be, Josh. We got engaged and Irene was sincerely happy for us both. This strong and loving woman always treated me and my new family in a very decent and loving manner.”

The woman continues, saying, “At the age of 25 I fell pregnant, and this was a significant event not only in terms of my long-awaited parenthood, but also for Irene, who was on cloud nine about the perspective of becoming a grandmother. And this was the exact point when my bio mother, Alyson, suddenly showed up. I got a call from an unfamiliar number one day, and this was her. She introduced herself, she said she understood my expected rage and rejection of her, but she begged me to meet her and to talk to her, and I agreed.”

Sarah met Alyson for the first time, and this was a breaking point for both women.

Sarah wrote, “My biological mom and I met in a small cafe near our house. I instantly recognized her when I walked in, because we do look so much alike. Irene knew about this meeting and when I told her about it, she was uncomfortable with it, but she didn’t object, and she even supported me in my wish to meet Alyson and listen to what she had to say.”

“Alyson told me the story of her and dad’s breakup. Turned out, there were many cases when she cheated on him, and he always forgave her for doing that to him. But once she fell pregnant with me, my dad became very suspicious and resentful, insisting that the baby wasn’t his, and he totally refused to believe that I was his child. Alyson got offended about his behavior, and there was a huge fight between them, which ended up in them being separated and then divorced.
Later on, dad insisted on a paternity test, which proved to be positive, and he accepted me as his child. He insisted that I must live with him from then on, and Alyson didn’t object, because, as she said, she wasn’t ready to devote her life to me at that point. Dad took a promise from her that she would never show up again and that she won’t try to contact me throughout my life, which Alyson did.”

Sarah took a step that seems too much even to herself now, but she has an excuse for it.

Sarah wrote, “I started communicating with Alyson from then on. When she found out that I’m pregnant, she was totally happy, and she asked me if she could be present in a delivery room. She explained that she wanted to witness how her grandson would be born, and I couldn’t say no.
In the meantime, Irene, my stepmom, didn’t mention that she would like to be present there. My pregnancy was an extremely tough experience, with a lot of complications, and I could barely think of anything except my own wellbeing, so I never even asked Irene if she would want to be present during childbirth.”

“When I started giving birth, Irene was beside me. She said she would go to the hospital with me and my husband and would be there, but I suddenly felt that this was wrong. As soon as I already said yes to Alyson, it hit me that this would be so inappropriate to have them both in the delivery room.
I felt like this was a sacred moment for me and these two women would be so negative towards each other, so I explained this to Irene. She went pale, she was so hurt. But she didn’t reproach me for anything, she just said she understood everything and that my maternal instinct must have been prompting me to have my bio mom with me at this special moment. She was saying a lot of supportive words, but I somehow brushed them all off.”

Sarah wrote, “Alyson was present during the childbirth, and she was so happy to be given this opportunity. But now, as I’m writing this, I have such a bitter feeling about everything and about Irene. My stepmom absolutely adores her grandson, but she hasn’t visited me ever since.
Whenever we come to her place, she’s so happy to meet the baby, but not me anymore. She’s cold and reserved, and I don’t know what to do. Am I wrong to act like I did? How can I fix everything between me and Irene now? I’m lost.”

And here’s yet another family story that proves that the relationships between parents and kids are often far from the idyllic ones that are pictured in the movies and soap operas. Here’s a story of a woman, 45, who decided to kick her youngest son out of their house, and her reasoning behind the decision has sparked a lot of controversy among people.

Preview photo credit freepik / Freepik


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I feel sorry for the stepmum. She raised this lady as her own child, from being a toddler, including after the fathers death. The stepmum raised her stepdaughter as a single mum, paid for her education etc. She must love her stepdaughter very much. Then to be tossed aside when the lady's bio mum reappears after all the hard work is done. The bio mum who admitted she didn't want to parent her daughter when she was tiny. This must be so heartbreaking for the stepmum.


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