I Reviewed Our Security Footage After My Sister-in-Law Watched My Newborn

Managing the relationship between a wife and her extended family can be tough in marriages. It’s important to balance getting along with in-laws and making sure you’re happy too. Recently, a new mom discovered that her sister-in-law was secretly meddling in her home life, especially with her newborn baby. She reached out to Bright Side for advice on handling this tricky situation.

Sandra, thanks for trusting us with this important issue. Here are five pieces of advice we hope will help you.

Look for a nanny.

You might want to think about bringing someone in to help out with looking after the baby while she’s busy. Maybe you could find someone to come over such as a nanny or a babysitter and watch the little one while you go out to buy groceries or take care of other things. This would mean Tiana wouldn’t have to take care of the baby, which could help avoid any awkwardness or problems with boundaries.

Check out different ways to get support.

It’s great to be there for the family when they’re going through a rough patch, but making sure your own family feels safe and comfortable comes first. Look into other ways to help Tiana, like finding support groups, counseling, or temporary places to stay. Let James know that you’re not turning your back on Tiana, but helping her find support that won’t affect your family’s happiness and safety.

Provide insight and compassion.

Show understanding for Tiana’s grief and challenges, while gently guiding her about boundaries and consent. Explain that even though she meant well, her actions regarding your child’s care weren’t okay without your permission. Suggest she talk to a professional to work through her feelings and find better ways to cope that respect boundaries.

Make sure you’re clear about your limits and what you’re comfortable with.

Find a quiet time to talk with James. Tell him how you’re feeling about what happened with Tiana. Make it clear that you sympathize with her, but you’re really uncomfortable with what she did. Explain that your main priority is the well-being of your baby. Together, you can set some clear rules about what’s okay and what’s not when it comes to taking care of your child at home.

Ask for a temporary separation.

Given how tricky things are at the moment, you might want to consider suggesting to Tiana that she stay with someone else for a short while until everything settles down. This could mean her staying with a friend or family member for a bit, but you’d still make sure to keep in touch and offer your support during this time.

In a different situation, a woman was upset to find out her husband had secretly installed cameras at home, making her feel like he didn’t trust her, so she filed for divorce. Read her story here.