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I’ve Been Helping My Sister for Years With No Return, Today I Kicked Her Out of the House
Supporting their sister, offering her a place to stay, financial help, and endless emotional support without asking for anything in return was a no-brainer for the person in today’s story. But everything changed when disappointment entered the picture.
Here’s what happened.
My sister has been living with us for the past 4 years— on and off, paying some bills when she can’t afford it. I ask if she helps around the house— I’ve paid her phone bill for the past two years, and I also am the only one putting money towards groceries.
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For the past several months she hasn’t paid anything towards bills (claiming she’s worrying about herself, not that she can’t afford it) but now she refuses to help out around the house when I ask small tasks like “When you’re home can you let my dogs out once or twice when I’m not,” and “Can you take the trash out when you see it’s full,” nothing too crazy.
Today, I went to check on my dogs via my pet camera and overheard her calling me a whole bunch of hateful names on the phone with someone. It really hurt my feelings because since she was 18 I have been the only family member willing to help her out—our mother didn’t want her after she turned 18.
I lost my temper and told her I’ve tried so hard to make sure she has a roof above her head, even giving her one of our cars so she had a vehicle— to which she responded, “You’ve never taken care of me, I’ve been the only one taking care of myself.” In the heat of things, I told her fine then pack your stuff and get out of my home since I don’t do anything for you, then you can figure out life without me. Now I feel like I might be the bad guy.
People stood on her side.
- “Your sister is 22 years old, and she needs to grow up sometime. She’s been freeloading off you for four years. She can’t live her life like a perpetual teenager forever.
It’s time for her to put whatever life skills she has to the test, or she should learn some quickly, especially if she thinks to disparage someone who has provided for her for four years. Actions have consequences.” Peony-Pony / Reddit - “A lot of people are suggesting you kick her out, which I agree with. Just make sure to check on your local laws, in some places, if a person has been living someplace for long enough, whether or not they have a lease or are paying, they have tenant rights.
And she sounds like the kind of person that would be happy to turn around and sue you if you kick her out without making sure everything is being done according to the laws in your area.” Wraithowl / Reddit - “If you feel bad about how it happened, then maybe it’s time for a sit-down. A heart-to-heart about how you are frustrated with her lack of action and assistance, that maybe you were harsh in the conversation, but it’s time for her to stand on her own two feet before it ruins your relationship. Point out she moved in at 18 — she’s had 4 years of not making progress, etc.
What did she think would happen? Stay with you indefinitely? Give her a deadline to move out, take over her own phone bill, etc.” CornerSevere / Reddit
- “The fact that she doesn’t seem to see your kindness and help towards her means she’s taking you for granted, secondly she’s not making any progress and completely dependent on you. It’s better for you to kick her out.” random8104 / Reddit
- “PLEASE stop being a doormat for your entitled sister. Kick her out and don’t look back, however, in a week or so she’ll message you BEGGING to come back and talk about how she’ll change. Don’t believe a word of it.” H***WHITEBOI25 / Reddit
- “If you don’t make her grow up and take responsibility for herself... she never will. She is living with you for free — eating food for free — driving a car for free....and yet she’s acting to friends as if you do nothing for her? She’s 22 now? And demanding you take care of and support her?
Oh no, you need to cut the cord now for your own good — and for hers.” omeomi24 / Reddit
In the end, the decision to ask their sister to leave was not made out of anger but out of necessity. After years of giving without receiving, they realized that they could no longer sacrifice their own well-being for the sake of someone who refused to change. Though it was a painful choice, it marked the beginning of a new chapter—one where they could finally focus on their own needs and live with a sense of peace and self-respect.
Comments
move yourself, no drama.
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