My MIL Keeps Eating All the Food in My House and I Flipped Out

Family & kids
2 months ago

Sometimes, it's the seemingly trivial matters that ignite family flames. In the case of one frustrated woman, the breaking point came when her mother-in-law's voracious appetite seemed to devour not just her food, but her patience as well.

She shared what happened.

Ever since I gave birth 4 months ago (so I have 4 kids total), my MIL has been showing up whenever she wants, and when she's here, she always helps herself to do whatever she wants. She has never offered to help me or the baby in any way, shape, or form. She's basically here to see her son and that's it.

Like, about 3 weeks ago, I made a small pot of coffee (enough for 2 cups). I went to go nurse the baby while waiting and at some point, my MIL showed up, and let herself inside. When I came out, she had drunk the entire pot. I had no coffee grounds left. Or she's eaten my leftovers straight out of the fridge multiple times. And she's always like "Thanks for the food/coffee!" as if I offered it to her when I absolutely didn't because all she's doing is making my life miserable.

I told my husband to speak to her about it, and he told me he did, but I truly don't think so. I spoke up the last time she was here (3 weeks ago) and told her she needed to stop helping herself because she was eating and drinking stuff that I wanted and/or made for myself. She said "Oh, I'm sorry" and then stopped coming around for a while.

Well, today I made 4 homemade pizzas. I told the kids to come help themselves to dinner and that I had to go get the baby down for a nap real quick and would be right back. It took me like 45 minutes because the baby was fussy. I came back out and ALL the pizza was gone and my MIL and husband were sitting there chowing away.

I just said, "Are you kidding me right now?" My husband asked what was going on, and I said, "You guys couldn't have even left me a slice? Sure, let's feed the neighborhood before I even get to eat. That's so awesome of you guys! Thanks!" And start to walk off.

My oldest son (13) comes in, and he's like, "Mum, I left you out a plate. I put it right on the counter" and walks over to grab it, and low and behold, that's gone too. MIL said, "I thought it was leftover from dinner."

So my son's apologizing to me even though he did nothing wrong, but my MIL and husband just stand there? They literally aren't saying anything. So I looked at both of them and said, "You both need to leave, now". My husband then decided to speak, saying that it was an "honest mistake" and that "no one meant any harm" and said I was making a mound out of a molehill, which honestly just pissed me off further.

So I snapped again and said, "Yeah, except every time your mother comes here, I end up going without because she eats or drinks my portion of everything. But sure, let's defend someone taking food out of my mouth, shall we?" His mother just storms out of the house and my husband looks at me like I'm insane, so I say "Quick, chase her" and walk out.

My husband thinks I'm crazy and that this all could have been resolved if I had "acted like an adult". He won't come home. But at this point, I don't even want him to come home because it means his mother will stay away.

People stood on her side.

  • "Easier to be a single mom than deal with a mommy's boy." Jaded-Kitty87 / Reddit
  • "Husband left and won't come back home, it's time to change the locks. If he wants to be childish, he can call and ask permission to come home." blinkiewich / Reddit
  • "It's not an "honest mistake" if someone has a pattern of doing something, apologizes when confronted, and then keeps doing it anyway." Pandoratastic / Reddit

My ex husband did the same to me many times.
Someone in the neighborhood gave us a plate full of delicious crumble cheese cake slices. 4 big slices, one slice for each one of us. (My husband, me, and 2 of my children (not for the baby) I had to put the baby to sleep. when I came back, all of the cheese cake slices were gone. when I frantically looked for my slice, my husband pushed a plate full of crumbles and said, its for you. I got so upset I screamed, but where is my slice! and my husband tried out a lame apology saying, "I didn't realize there is no more:. I started crying "But there was one slice for each one of us and you ate two..." My husband showed no empathy. he walked out on me, and my 6 year old son gave me his half eaten slice. I started to cry even more from his touching gesture and I said, "no, I don't want to finish yours and he pushed the plate towards me and resolutely said "mommy please eat mine, you deserve this!"

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Reply
  • "Your husband is an idiot and is enabling his mother, who is 100% doing this intentionally. I bet your son has clocked this and that's why he tried to save you a plate. I don't blame you for not wanting your husband to come home, sounds like your life is easier without him there." MouseAndLadybug / Reddit
  • "This is so not cool. I love how your 13-year-old took on the man of the house role by setting aside a plate while hubby played dumb." Flynn_JM / Reddit
  • "They are both infuriating. What husband is ok with his wife going hungry? Especially when she needs strength and nourishment to raise HIS children. He’s a disgrace." Vast-Video-7701 / Reddit
  • "Stop cooking anything for your husband and change the locks, so his mommy can't keep walking in without you letting her. Your kids recognize how you are being treated." misstiff1971 / Reddit
  • "Once is an accident, twice is unfortunate, and anything after that is just psychological warfare." pancho_2504 / Reddit
  • "NTA. I’m so angry for you. This is a husband's problem, he won’t stand up for you when you truly deserve it. Your MIL is his problem. If you have the means to leave and take yourself to a nice, leisurely dinner, please do so." Slight_Perspective75 / Reddit

It's clear that communication and boundaries are crucial in any relationship, especially when it comes to matters as basic as sharing meals. While the clash over food may seem trivial, it often represents deeper issues of respect, autonomy, and familial dynamics. Perhaps, in the aftermath of this culinary showdown, both parties can find common ground and navigate a path forward that respects each other's needs and boundaries.

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