10 Cynical Things That Aren’t Always True

Psychology
5 years ago

Being a cynic is kind of like a defense mechanism: if you keep your hopes low, you probably won’t be too disappointed when things don’t go your way. But there’s such a thing as being too cynical. A lot of the ideas that pessimists treat like unspoken rules simply aren’t true and can do more harm than good.

We at Bright Side want to encourage you to, well, look at the “bright side” of life! So we’re looking at a bunch of reasons why thinking things are hopeless isn’t always fair or true. Don’t forget to check out our bonus feature where we show how there’s always a happy medium.

1. Marriage is just a trap.

Marriage takes time and work, but it’s worth it in the end. We’re social creatures who need each other, and marriage reflects this in its purest form. People need to care and sacrifice for each other. It’s only a trap if we allow ourselves to make it one. And let’s not kid ourselves, there are plenty of boys who dream of getting married when they grow up just like little girls are thought to.

2. Children are all take and no give.

Children give us a lot: love, company, and perhaps most importantly, someone to guilt into taking care of us when we get too old to take care of ourselves. After all, we often forget that we were once little, and it’s only right that we give to our kids what our parents provided for us, and our kids will share the same with their children when they grow up. It’s the circle of life!

3. People always want to take something from you.

Remember, when you think people are out to get you, you are kind of putting yourself on some high pedestal. Everyone is the hero of their own story. In other words, people have their own lives to live and their own problems, so they probably aren’t spending their time thinking up new ways of trying to antagonize or take advantage of you.

4. You should always prepare for the worst.

Don’t waste your time being too pessimistic. Life is filled with good times, bad times, and things beyond our control. In the end, life is also what you make it. If you expect bad, you’ll start to anticipate it. It’s only when you look for the good in things that you’ll find it and it’s all about your outlook.

5. Being rude is just being real.

There’s a notion of thinking that being rough with people just shows you’re genuine. Everyone, no matter how little you think of them, deserves your basic respect. You don’t have to be everyone’s friend, but there’s no reason to assume you have a right to be rude and inconsiderate of others. Even when people acting polite might seem “fake,” it probably reflects what they want to make of the world, not what they think the world is actually like.

6. Innocence is a sign of weakness.

Assuming someone is ignorant about life just because they come off a little naive is just as fair as assuming that you always know what’s best. In other words, every way of thinking has merit. Added to that, appearances can be deceiving! Just because someone likes to live on the brighter side of life doesn’t mean that’s all they know.

7. Romance is just for fairy tales.

It’s true that you shouldn’t base your love life on what you read in storybooks. Real romance takes time and patience, but it can be healthy and beautiful if you find someone who’ll work at things with you. Also, remember that there are all kinds of love just as important as romance that can be found in friendships, family and in your spiritual life — even loving yourself is great and necessary.

8. Insults are just telling it like it is.

You might think that you’re doing a good deed by insulting a person’s appearance or habits. But here’s the thing: most sloppy people know they’re sloppy. Most quiet people know they’re quiet. They’re not going to wave a wand and change themselves because you brought their attention to it. You’re not doing anyone any favors by humiliating them over things they already know and are already dealing with.

9. People never change.

Nobody is naturally good or bad. We’re retroactively good or bad because of the choices we make in life and the intentions behind them. It’s one thing to worry about whether someone who claims to have changed is just kidding themselves. It’s another thing entirely to act like people never change; it’s the same as denying free will.

10. Everyone is guilty until proven innocent.

First of all, everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt. People get accused of things they didn’t do all the time. Never forget that people used to be burned at the stake for being witches...which don’t exist. Added to that, the world is never that black and white. Even when someone did something wrong, it could’ve been exaggerated or taken horribly out of context.

Bonus: Being a realist is the happy medium between being a cynic and being naive.

We’re not saying that you need to be an optimist all the time or that cynics don’t ever have a point, but the important thing is to look back and think of any situation as a whole. The world is filled with varied circumstances, where there are both good and bad. To some extent, being a cynic on occasion is okay because it makes you aware of the bad in the world. The main problem with being too cynical is that it stops you from actually trying to change the problems you face for the better.

What are some other cynical things people say that you think aren’t entirely true? Please share them with us in the comments!

Illustrated by Alena Tsarkova for Bright Side

Comments

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I think when people are being rude, they are just trying to hide that they are really unhappy

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I don't like people who judge from the first side and insult others for nothing without even trying to get to know them better.

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Adding to #3 on the list: interestingly, in America at least, crime is actually at the lowest it's been in decades. Of course that's not to say it's completely gone, but things have changed for the better. :) Unfortunately, a lot of people still act like crime has skyrocketed to terrifying out-of-control levels. The rise of 24 hour news networks might be to blame for that.

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