16 Families Who Have Very Different Opinions on How to Raise Children

Every person has their own views on how to raise the younger generation, whether it’s food, bedtime, gifts, or extracurricular activities. It’s not easy for a mum and dad to find a compromise on these things, but when someone else gets involved, the compromise becomes almost impossible.

• My daughter is a blue-eyed angel with blonde curls. She loves all kinds of hairpins, bows and headbands. I dress her up like a princess, but my mother-in-law freaks out, saying that I shouldn’t dress her up, so that no one would want to jinx her.
  Once, she went for a walk with my daughter. And when they came back, I almost had a heart attack: my mother-in-law was glowing, and my daughter was bald! She shaved her, so that “her hair would grow better” and “to make her less beautiful.” I’m just shocked, my daughter is crying (her grandmother had told her that it was a game. They played hairdressers, and the mother-in-law told her that the hair would grow back quickly).
  Now no hairpins, no bows... Is this woman a normal person, in your opinion?
• I married a woman with a child. The boy was 5 years old, now he’s 12. We got along well — played football and board games. But he’s starting to come of age. The other day he spoke to me rudely for no particular reason, so I took away his tablet. My wife decided to get involved, saying, “Don’t you dare punish him! You’re not his father!”
  So I banged my fist on the table for the first time in my life and said, “I’m not his father — I’m his dad! I was his shoulder to cry on when the boys in school mocked him and taught him how to fight back. I taught him to read, write and ride a bike. I bought him everything he owns at this point. I took him to judo and painting classes. I taught him not to be afraid of monsters under his bed. And I have the right to take away his tablet if my son misbehaves.”
  I’ve had a huge fight with my wife. If she doesn’t come to her senses, we’ll probably divorce.
• I came to visit my sister, and her daughter, as always, looked into my bag and was like, “What did you bring me?” My sister just smiled, “Children should be spoiled.” But I just popped in for a minute, and didn’t have anything, so my niece pouted her lips and called me greedy. Well, I can be cunning, too.
  I put some very pretty hairpins in my bag today. So I came, my niece immediately ran to my bag, found the hairpins, pulled them out, and was like, “Oh, they’re so cool!” I took them from her and said, “Yes, I also liked them, so I bought them for myself. I wanted to buy them for you too, but those who search other people’s bags and call their aunts greedy don’t deserve presents.”
  My niece took offense. But she is already 9 years old, it’s time for her to learn how to behave. And if my sister doesn’t want to bring her up, I guess I’ll have to do it.

• My husband and his mother really piss me off. They both have health problems: the husband has a bad stomach, and his mother has been on insulin all her life because she has diabetes. And guess what? They both eat all sorts of stuff: jellybeans, sweets, tons of chocolate, even though both of them are not allowed to do that!
  Then they complain to me about not feeling well! But the most annoying thing is that they feed this stuff to our daughter. I allow her to eat candy in moderation, but when I’m not there, they give her so much chocolate that she gets rashes afterwards. It’s annoying! © Overheard — They’re talking about you here / VK
• My husband and I earn really good money. We also have 2 sons and 2 daughters. And recently, my husband said that it was time for us to think about securing our daughters’ future and buying them apartments. “What about the sons?” I asked.
  And my husband explained to me that he didn’t think it was necessary to buy apartments to future men because they should earn on them themselves. I was so pissed off! We have money for these apartments.
  Why should our children have to work hard from a young age because they are of a different gender? I’ve been fighting with my husband for a month, and we can’t come to terms. It’s not far from divorce, but I’m not going to treat my children in a different way. © Mamdarinka / VK
• My husband thinks that our 6-month-old son should sleep in a separate room. And I’m sure that it’s too soon, especially since I still breastfeed him. And in general, I think it’s dangerous for a baby to sleep alone unsupervised.
  My husband claims that the baby wakes him up at night, and he’s tired of it. I suggested we sleep in different rooms, but he said that this is the first step to divorce because the husband and wife should sleep together. And I can’t sleep well without knowing how my baby is doing.
  And I still have to get up and feed the baby at least twice a night. How much rest will I get running back and forth? But this doesn’t seem to bother my husband at all. © Mamdarinka / VK

• My 5-year-old daughter goes to an art class and every 2 days she brings a new drawing. I keep each of them carefully in special folders, I already have 3 of them.
  But my husband doesn’t understand why I do it. He says that his parents also did it, it was pleasant to him, but not more than that. But I still keep my daughter’s drawings and crafts, for I am that child whose works were never kept.
  And I would so love to see what I drew as a child. At least one drawing. And if my adult daughter won’t want to see her drawings, I’ll understand. But I won’t forgive myself if she wanted, and I didn’t keep this memory for her. © Mamdarinka / VK
• My daughter is 4, and up until a year ago she adored dogs. And then my mother-in-law got a French bulldog and a mix between a bulldog with a fighting dog. The dogs are kind, but crazy. They are not trained and can jump and tear other people’s clothes with their claws when they are excited.
  So they once pushed my daughter into the snow. They were happily running around and jumped on her a couple of times. Now the child is very afraid of dogs. I try to fight this phobia, but the conflict is this: my mother-in-law believes that phobias don’t exist.
  She believes that her dogs are wonderful, and the child is just a sissy. The mother-in-law freaks out when the child refuses to walk in her house, so my husband and I have to carry her in the arms. It’s all because the dogs want attention. They want to sniff, lick, and play. And my daughter gets scared and cries.
  For my mother-in-law, it’s a joke. In her opinion, we should teach our daughter to not be afraid of small dogs because she’s a big girl, and it’s a shame that we have to carry her. © Unknown author / Pikabu

• My husband and I have a daughter who is 9 years old. My daughter has a good athletic figure, but my husband believes that she is “overweight” and constantly tells both her and me about it. With the height of 4 feet 3 inches, my daughter has a normal weight of 64 pounds.
  But my husband compares her to his other daughter from his first marriage. She’s skinny, and her mother is skinny. And my daughter, most likely, has my body type. I’m 5 feet 5 inches tall, and weigh 132 pounds.
  I am fine with my body, but my husband continues to ridicule her, and neither persuasion nor quarrels don’t help. And today I filed for divorce. I won’t let him ruin my daughter’s childhood. She’s healthy, beautiful, slim. And it’s terrible that her father can’t see this. © Mamdarinka / VK
• I always consult with my son on important family matters: home design, menus, traveling. We discuss these things, find a compromise that will suit everyone, give in on little things. For example, he didn’t like the cleaning lady — he said she smelled. I didn’t feel it, but I found another one. And my son doesn’t mind my dog, which I dreamed of, although he’s not fond of it.
  We are fine, but my mother-in-law thinks that the child’s opinion means nothing, and I’m crazy that I let my son have his own opinion. But I grew up in the family where we respected each other, while my husband after his childhood has been in therapy for 5 years... © Overheard / Ideer
• I recently had a baby and hired a night nanny. I am a freelancer, love my work and earn good money. I don’t have a husband, and having a clear head is very important to me. I also have a cleaning lady who comes once a week for general cleaning and ironing. The nanny comes at 10 p.m., I sleep from 11 p.m. to 7 a.m., then the nanny is free.
  So, because of all this, I’ve stopped talking to my mum and sister. My mother thinks I’m crazy: I have a nanny and a cleaner at once, and she did everything herself when she was young. And my sister is more concerned about the money I spend on this. She thinks that I should give this money to her because she gets very tired at work and supports her unemployed husband.
  I suggested my mum watch her granddaughter at night and my sister clean my house, so that I would pay them and not strangers. They both took offense, so I told them to take a hike. This is what our family support looks like. © Overheard / Ideer

• My 15-year-old daughter started asking us for an Apple Watch. We live on an average income, and no one in the family has an iPhone or this watch. We asked her why she wants it, and she said, “Everybody has one, and I want it too.”
  I suggested she wait till September, when she has a birthday, but she refused to wait and just pouted her lips. This is not the first situation like this. And I know that after some time she will come to. But the next day, my daughter had a brand-new watch on her hand.
  My husband gave it to her! He couldn’t bear to see his daughter upset, so he bought it on credit. I think it’s stupid, and got really offended with my husband.
  Children should be loved and pampered, but it’s nonsense to indulge their every whim. Now I don’t talk to my husband, and he just shrugs his shoulders, saying that he couldn’t do otherwise. It’s infuriating. © Mamdarinka / VK
• My children love curd snacks, so there is always a big supply of them in the fridge. Everyone is happy about it except for my husband. A year ago, he became obsessed with healthy eating and believes that sugar is very bad for health. He doesn’t eat it himself and doesn’t want to give it to the kids.
  At first, I was sympathetic with his views and even cooked separate food for him. I also removed some very unhealthy food from our diet too. But when my husband began to eat food without sugar, salt, oil, meat, spices, without frying and boiling, I washed my hands, and he began to cook for himself.
  Previously he refrained from commenting on my and kids’ plates, just occasionally told us about healthy dieting, but yesterday he threw the kids’ curd snack away. I couldn’t take it anymore and kicked him out the house. He can live with his mom and peddle this crap to her, I can’t take it anymore! © Mamdarinka / VK

• My ex-husband has a son from a previous marriage who is in the ninth grade now, but they have little contact with him, even though they live together. We broke up when his son was 6, but I still keep in touch with him all the time. We see each other, he comes to visit me, sometimes we can go out for lunch, go to the movies. If something happens at school, I’m the first person they call, because his dad doesn’t pick up the phone or says he doesn’t care.
  The strangest thing is that his son always calls me first. I don’t mind, I’m glad he trusts me so much and we have a good relationship. Many times I tried to talk to my ex-husband about it, but he gets angry and thinks I’m turning his son against him. It’s a stupid situation, but I don’t think it’s the child’s responsibility to pay for misunderstandings between adults. © Mamdarinka / VK
• I don’t think of my daughter as a child. For me, she is an adult, albeit inexperienced. And when my wife is not at home, my daughter and I communicate like 2 adults.
  It turned out that she doesn’t know how to cook. But that’s okay, by the end of the day she could roast eggplants and help me bake. She really liked it, but her mum keeps delaying the moment of her independence.
  Another time without her mother, we exchanged our music libraries, listening to each other’s favorite music. Now she sometimes sends me new releases. And I bought her good headphones, so that she listened to music in good quality. We have different tastes in music, but I don’t impose anything.
  In general, children are children because you treat them that way. But they are actually smarter than many of my acquaintances and neighbors. It’s worth changing your approach to them, and you’ll see it for yourself. © Berdas / Pikabu
• My wife and I have a beautiful 3-year-old little girl together. Now, if I’m being honest, our daughter is definitely growing up to be a typical daddy’s girl. Her first word was Dada, her first steps were spent walking over to me, whenever she wants a hug she reaches out to me, and whenever we feed her my wife struggles to get her to open her mouth to actually eat while she’ll eat anything I try to give her without hesitation.
  Yesterday, after we put our daughter to bed, my wife asked to speak with me about something important. She pulled me aside and said she was worried about our daughter’s behavior, she said she was worried about her growing up not loving her mother as much as her father. I was sympathetic toward her because I definitely thought the same thing for a little while.
  I told her she should sign up for a mommy and me class because it would be a great opportunity for them to bond, but she said she’s too busy to do something like that. So I asked what she wanted to do, and her answer shocked me. She said she’d like me to leave the house for a week to stay with my sister without telling my daughter first, she said that would practically force her and our daughter to bond. I said absolutely not.
  To me, that sounded like the worst plan in the history of mankind. She tried to convince me, saying it was the best option. I called her selfish and told her she was out of her mind to expect me to abandon our daughter when she’s so young for any amount of time. She said that I was actually the selfish one for hogging my daughter’s attention.
  She then stormed into the guest bedroom and slept there for the night. And today she’s done nothing but ignore me, and whenever she sees me do anything with our daughter, she glares at me. © ThrowRA_girldad / Reddit

And here are 8 signs that you grew up in a toxic family. Check them out.