19 Employers Whose Requests Defy Logic

The labor market is a wonderland. Sometimes you come to apply for a job and find yourself in some parallel reality where they are looking for one person, but you have to work for 3. It seems that the employers’ imagination of how to make the life of applicants and employees “wonderful and amazing” has no limits.

• I recently heard from an HR manager, “We ask any job applicant, even a cleaner or a head of a department, to choose one car brand out of 3: A, B or C.”
  I asked him why, and he said, “The point is that our director has a B. It is important to recruit people with the same values in the company, so we do not hire those who choose A or C!” © Gauree / Pikabu
• The other day I got a call, “Have you been looking for a job as an analyst or sysadmin? Are you interested only in IT jobs?” I said, “Yes, but you can surprise me with something else.”
  Well, she did, “We’re opening a warehouse in your city, we need loaders, would you like to work for us?” © shepard13 / Pikabu
• I went for an interview at a firm. We talked, agreed on everything. I asked where the ladies’ room was. The HR manager showed me and hesitated, “Only you have to pay for the toilet.” I said, “That’s illegal.”
  And then she admits that they have to pay to go there too. It wasn’t always like that. The toilet became paid only 3 weeks ago, because the owner changed. The director had an agreement with the previous one, and they are still discussing the terms with the new one.
  According to rumors, he is looking at the “profitability” of the business in the first month, and then he will set the cost of season tickets, which the employer promised to provide the employees with. What a circus! © HelKor1995 / Pikabu

• Just for fun, I placed an ad, “I’ll help you solve any of your problems for this amount of money.” A couple of weeks later, an anonymous client offered me to meet on the cathedral’s observation deck. That’s when my knees started to tremble.
  In the end, it turned out that my client was an imposing older man. We walked around the observation deck, then chatted in the restaurant for another 2 hours about traveling and life. It seemed like casual conversation, but it sounded like an interrogation.
  Eventually, he paid the bill and gave me a tenth of my “fare” with the words, “Your life experience is not enough to solve my problem, but here is compensation.” When I asked why we met on the observation deck, he replied, “I just wanted to visit this place.” This was probably the most unusual earning in my life. © GutalinMySadness / Pikabu
• A friend’s son went to study in China and found a part-time job there. No waiting tables, deliveries, or tutoring. The employer had just 3 conditions: show up at a café in the evening, have fun, eat and drink — all on the house. And they even paid him for it.
  Turns out, in China, a venue’s prestige skyrockets if foreigners are seen there. So owners of new cafés hire “expats” just for the atmosphere. And the students love it — free dinner, a party, and money. © Maximum597 / Pikabu
• I work construction, here and there. Clients often ask about my education — I’ve got 2 degrees, secondary and higher. If I say “university,” they look down on me, like “What are you doing on a construction site then?” If I say “high school,” they scoff, “Couldn’t get into college, huh?”
  I got tired of it, so now I just say, “3 grades and 2 hallways.” And suddenly they’re all, “Ohh, nice, one of us!” Makes the job a lot easier. © toshka1kartoshka / Pikabu

• Another funny vacancy, “A photographer wanted who can play drums. For regular cooperation.” Maybe it is also necessary to be able to play a trumpet? © smit1987 / Pikabu
• I went in to apply for an administrative assistant position, and the guy kept asking me questions about liking kids and are my passport’s up-to-date, etc. I was so confused.
  Turns out what he really wanted was a nanny for his 2 young kids to travel with him and his wife back to India. I was so pissed he wasted my time. © you_are_marvelous / Reddit

• I decided to update my résumé — just in case. Set my status to “Not looking for a job” and forgot about it. A couple of days later, I get a call, “We’re interested in you.” The girl’s voice was pleasant, so I agreed to an interview — who knows, maybe they’d offer me a fortune.
  I join the Zoom call. The manager starts off bluntly, “Why did you apply?” I said, “I didn’t. Your HR rep was the one who insisted on the interview.” Silence.
  Then the boss says, “We don’t need job-hoppers!” I go, “You invited me, I didn’t ask for anything.” That’s how I almost changed jobs without even trying. HR logic is a mystery. © Exphusb / Pikabu
• Someone sent me a link to an interesting job opening. The employer had a few requirements: a résumé and links to social media profiles. I’m not into public exposure, so I only have one social media account with 10 photos and another with an empty profile. They rejected me.
  Their reason? “You don’t maintain an active enough media presence.” This came from someone with 1,800 posts like “I went to a café,” “I looked at the menu,” “I went to the bathroom.” © Overheard / VK
• Our boss decided to make the office more modern and introduced “relaxation hours” after work. So now, after 6 p.m., we’re supposed to stay in the office for another 2 hours, where we can see a psychologist, watch TV on beanbags, chat, or play billiards. Almost no one showed up for these adventures.
  The boss got upset, took it personally, and started complaining. We tried to explain that most of the team is in their thirties — people have families, they want to spend their evenings at home, not live at work. Didn’t help. © Overheard / Ideer

• A friend offered me a decent sum to break up a concrete slab (about 5×3.3×1.6 ft) in the basement. 2 guys had tried before me with no luck. I spent 3 days hammering from morning till night: my arms were numb, the blisters kept me from sleeping.
  By day 3, I figured out I could drill and chip it off in chunks. Why they wanted it gone is still a mystery — the slab just lay on the ground, and later they raised the floor by 1.5 feet. Strangest job I’ve ever had. © ZhabaGaduka / Pikabu
• I worked as a proofreader while I was a student. In the office, I used my old spelling dictionary — a gift from my father, a 40-year-old edition. When I quit, I took it with me.
  Then I got a call — the director accused me of stealing it and demanded I return the dictionary. When I tried to explain, he asked for a receipt. Of course, I just laughed. © wanna312be / Pikabu
• On my first day at work, they allowed us to take office supplies from the storage room. So, I took a hole punch, pens, a notebook, and sticky notes.
  The director looked at all that and backtracked, “That’s too expensive! From now on, only take paper and folders.” I had to buy everything myself — a stapler, paper clips, even upgraded the computer with my own parts.
  When I quit, I spent 2 days carrying my stuff out in 7 bags. I left behind only a bare desk, chair, monitor, a disassembled PC case, and... that same hole punch. Such a “generous” employer. © Enicc / Pikabu

• I was told the person I would be supporting as an Executive Assistant was on his third wife, he has 6 kids and that I should include the wife in certain decisions so that she doesn’t feel insecure (being the third wife and all). Ain’t nobody got time for third wife insecurity drama. © SSOJ16 / Reddit
• At the interview, they asked me to take off my shirt to prove I didn’t have gang tattoos, I walked out without saying another word. © Flashy_Adeptness8597 / Reddit
• I remember Taco Bell asked me what type of animal I would be if I could be anything. Like, what do you want me to say? “I would be a fire ant so I could work efficiently with my closest friends!”
  16-year-old me said an eagle, because they’re strong and they can fly. Meh... © HereComesTheSarcasm / Reddit

• I was interviewed at a game development company. They gave me a test task which I was supposed to do for free — to create a new large location, a biosystem, and a multi-stage quest for an existing project. I politely declined.
  Then they “simplified” the task: removed the location description but kept the quest with dialogues. Pure audacity, like “We’ll pretend to compromise, but you’ll still work for free!”
  Later, I read reviews saying they do this all the time: give huge test assignments and then just take candidates’ work for themselves. © Lepenson / Pikabu
• Sat down with the owner and the first thing he said was, “I don’t hire people with beards.” I said okay, got up and walked out. © lookssharp / Reddit

And these people regretted that they didn’t leave their job interviews immediately.