A Woman Wonders Whether She Was Rude to Her Sister’s Indiscreet Boyfriend

We know that bringing someone new to a family gathering can go one of 2 ways, either very nice or really bad. That’s because a stranger is being introduced to a group of people who know nothing about that person. And it can get very tricky if that new addition turns out to be indiscreet and disregards other people’s feelings. In this case, it’s very easy for the situation to get out of hand and to say things that are highly insulting.

One of our Bright Side readers faced a very similar problem and emailed us asking for advice on how to resolve the bad blood that was created.

We at Bright Side sat down and talked about the problem, and we would like to provide her with some advice that might be helpful.

Hi Kristina,

Thank you for sharing this obviously sensitive topic with us. Firstly, let us tell you that you have every right to be upset about your sister’s boyfriend’s comments about your fertility issues. This is something that affects 1 in 8 couples and people should be very careful with what they say. However, you have one big problem right now, which is making things better with your sister.

• You need to meet alone with your sister since she seems to not understand how harmful her boyfriend’s comments were for you. You need to explain to her why what he said about you not being meant to be a parent was heartbreaking. What you’re going through is a medical condition and not some kind of punishment or sign.
• You need to explain to her why you are not comfortable talking about your infertility struggles. You can also let her know how she can support you. Asking questions all the time won’t make things better. You can talk to her about any news or procedures you have whenever you want.

• You also need to tell her that it was wrong of her to answer for you about which one has the fertility problem. This is something between you and your husband, and just because you’ve told your families, it doesn’t give them the right to talk about it with others.
• Give her a wake-up call about her boyfriend. He seems to be very insensitive to people’s feelings and hides behind his “honest” mask. Asking a woman why she doesn’t have kids is rude in the first place.
• You don’t have to see him again if you don’t feel comfortable, and you can tell your sister that. It’s her choice to be with a man with these qualities, but you don’t have to be around him if you don’t want to.

What would you have done in a similar situation? Maybe you’ve experienced something like this and can offer some life-saving advice that worked nicely for you.