I Refused to Leave My Legacy to My DIL’s Daughter—She’s Not My Family

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modify your will that your estate will be for your blood grandchildren only. if they do not accept it, it will go to a charity of your choice or a close relative you are comfortable with. the father may not want the inheritance but give your grandchildren the choice if they want it.
your money, your choice, not anyone else's.

you are a terrible person you loved her before you found out and then you disowned her , so pathetic

Reap what you sow! You are NOT a nice person

Oh poor you. You brought this on yourself. You loved her before you found out but that love & money died when you found out.

Do you love the kid? It shouldn't matter if she is blood related. Your husband made a choice to love her dispite not being his. But you had a temper tantrum and took her out of the will. Well now you made your bed and have to sleep in it. I hope your happy alone. You need to apologize and get over it.

It should not matter if she is your own blood or not. She deserves to be treated with as much love and respect as the others. She shouldn't be punished for something she had no control over. That is just heartless and uncalled for and that poor child is being punished for something that isn't even her fault. You should be ashamed of yourself. If you cant find it in your heart to love them all equally that you wouldn't be around any of them. Period!!!!!

And you honestly think your right to think like this? Wow just wow you couldn't be more wrone. Your a terrible person. Love isn't something you can just turn off.

What a POS!
My granddaughter is my granddaughter, even if she is not my son's biological child, and I'm happy to have her in my life.
Even if my son and his wife were to split up I would hope to be a part of her life as her grandma.

You disgust me.

You're toxic. I really don't know how someone like you could be the mother of a humane and righteous person as your son seems to be. At 62, you should have learnt that you are not allowed to make this kind of differentiation among siblings. Blood means little. What matters is love and respect. Untill you found out about your granddaughter not being biologically yours, you loved her and cherished her. What has changed? You lost your son's family because of a technicality.

The lawyers would not inform the son.
But pretending this is real. She's a major a hole. This is not a a stepchild that jordan the family as a teenager. This child was literally born in the family.
I can understand if she chooses to make sure that family.Heirlooms go to the biological kids. But money and anything acquired during her lifetime should be split equal with all three grandchildren.

What if she was adopted? And then your dil and son had 2 biological children? Would you have disowned her too? Guessing you lord your money over your son to keep him in line. Enjoy your pity party. That you created. And hopefully your son cuts you out permanently.

It's your own fault. If your son accepted as his own then you should also. I guess the reason he didn't tell in the first place was he knew how you would react

I can understand, but at the same time love is not DNA related. Had you found this out right after her birth, that would be one thing. 14 years later, this is your oldest grandchild. You have loved and been there for her and now she is no one to you? Seems like your son knew you well. He just thought that after you got to know her, you would see family is not only about blood. Most people who preach about legacy do not have enough assets to cover the word. You did not calm down and think this through. So now you have no family. Yay you. Hope it was worth it

My stepdaughter's children are not related to me by blood but they are still my granddaughters! If your son was willing to accept her and love her as his family, then how can you not do the same?

How can you turn love off? For 14 years you loved her, now all of a sudden she is no longer family. Your other grandchildren will hate you. They may think if they even do something that you don't like you will stop loving them too. I would not want you anywhere near my children.

You are a cruel woman that is horrible. I'm glad your son did what he did.

You are cold hearted bitch who has no human compassion. Your son unconditionally loves all his children and so should you!

He kept this from you likely bc he knows that you are terribly inflexible, that you see everything in black-and-white. But one thing in this world has many shades of gray and that's true love. If your son understands this but you don't, then I wager that he suggested heavily under your care and found other ways to learn love. Often people who are neglected and abused have a lot of compassion and love bc they know how horrible it feels to live without it. You treated her the same as the others for so long but drop her when she's done nothing. If anyone is wrong it is his wife... And now you. If she is a monster, he chose her bc she fits the model of love and care you showed him women should give. She's probably very much like you. You've probably raised a good, strong man who will raise kind children. It's a shame you're too cold hearted to see that.
That's assuming any of this is true anyway.

You feel betrayed? Really. Either this is a very well written hoax or you are truly the wicked witches other sister. Wow to think you only loved her because you believed she was your son's bloodline. What if she was adopted by both? Would she also be an out sider.

You've loved this child for 14 yrs !! How do you just decide to stop and disown her?? You feel betrayed? How do you think that innocent precious girl feels? How do you think your son and your DIL and grandkids feel? Im just ...WOW!! I get your upset , but to just betray your whole family ? She is every bit His daughter as the other 2 kids !! You betrayed the whole Family !! Blood does not make you family , Love does.. You dont deserve any of them if thats how you easily you turn your back Lady ..

I don't believe your son could stop you from leaving an inheritance to your grandchildren in a trust. They would inherit it as adults. He could cut you out of their lives though. Did you not love your grand daughter when you thought she was your blood? Family is about more than blood. It's about people you care about and who care about you.

You loved that child for 14 years when you thought she was blood. Was that love real or fake? Why does it change because she is not blood related. I have three bonus gran babies and love them as much as my biological grandchildren. I think it is horrible of you to deny her love now. Forget the money just knowing that after 14 years to find out your father is not your biological dad and that the grandmother you love is rejecting you because of it. I think your son did the right thing to protect his kids. The kids will still get your legacy because it lives in your son even without the money. Leave your money to whoever you want but was it worth loosing
your family for you ego?

Wow, your certainly get what you deserve. Your son took the child as his own and this is what you do
I don't blame him

I don't have grandchildren of my own yet but I was asked to be an adopted Nana and I love that child as if he was was my Grandbaby. I can't imagine when my children do get around to having kids I would stop loving him because he got "replaced by the real ones". What a horrible person you are. Shame on you and your son did the right thing. I hope his daughter never finds out what YOU DID because the scars of rejection will be with her the rest of her life.

Put the kids you wish in the will and whatever else you need to do, just make sure they will have it when they turn 18. Your son will have no say about any of it. I don't know your relationship with family but what you do is your perogative.

Good on him. My lord but your cruel. That man considered that young lady his daughter. And you have called her your own four 14 years then when you find out other wise you just turn her out. How vindictive can you be!?? As for how your son is treating you!?? GOOD ON HIM. He's protecting his family from a cold hearted ol hag who only values blood. Those kids don't need you around them. So I guess you got what you wanted. If this isn't what you wanted. Then you need to apologize on beened knees not only to your first born granddaughter. but to your son and his wife as well.

Good on him for protecting the family he built himself. You made yourself redundant, congrats.

You’d think in your big old age that you’d have the smarts and the heart expected of a Grandmother… I guess not…

if they had adopted children would you have done the same. cut them out of your will. probably. your son was smart to cut you out if his life and his childrens life. your an ahole for not accepting the child. like others have said you are disgusting. you did this to yourself because only blood matters to you. i come from a family who didnt give a shit about me. but my bff family has welcomed me as one of their children. even stood at the altar when they renewed their wedding vows. im not blood but they dont care.

You're disgusting. Your son accepted that child as his. You deserve to be alone you despicable old hag.

You made your bed now you have to lay in it. Family is more than blood.

Family is more than blood. A lesson you won't soon forget

You can die al9ne now grandma. Good. Serves you right.

What a horrible grandmother you are. You cut a kid out of your life who has seen you as grandma for 14 years? I would of done the exact same thing. You deserved this treatment. Hope you are happy now. They don't need or want you anymore. Serves you right.

She was clearly wrong. She just didn't expect her son to tell her that to her face. So she should make it right.

Give your estate to someone who will appreciate it. You don't need these people.

You went a little over board to quick......on the other hand they didn't respect you enough to be honest with you. Its poor judgement on both sides to be so quick to quickly cut off people who are immediate family. Apologize to your stepgranddaughter , she holds no blame. If they still feel the same way, then don't give them a dime and wait them out.

You can just live by yourself.. And die alone. You have shown us who you are. That oldest child probably be the one who would come to your hateful aid. We don't know the future and who we will need in our life. It's good your family see the real you. You deserve what you received.

Definitely a HUGE A-hole. Shame on you and how dare you treat an innocent child like that? So what if she's not "blood" related? Your son chose to accept and love this child before she was born and nobody had to tell you she wasn't his bio kid. How hurt your granddaughter; because that's what she is, must feel because you now don't think of her as family. I applaud your son for what he did and I hope he sticks to this and you can wallow in your misery. Having the same "blood" as others doesn't make a family nor should it. You'll never be able to make this right because the pain you inflicted on the oldest grandchild will stick with her for years to come let alone have ramifications the rest of the family will have to deal with due to your hateful actions. Again Shame on you

What a horrible, heartless monster you are. For years you loved and cared for your FIRST grandchild. Then out of nowhere for something that's not her fault you turn ice cold towards her. The issues are between her parents (your son and DIL), not you. And definitely not the 14 year old. She deserves love too. YOU don't deserve those grandchildren and you can give "your" legacy to someone else. Oh and from the sounds of it you can also spend the rest of your life alone and deservingly so.

Bravo to your son. I get that blood matters, but it shouldn't be everything. I mean, how do people like you even manage to have kids if blood is all that matters, unless you only procreate with other blood relations? You have presumably loved this child for 14 years and suddenly because of something she has no control over her she is no longer important to you. You are cold and heartless. At this point, anything you do will appear to only be to have access to there younger kids and that's not fair to the kids. Even if he let's you back in, your relationship forever have a giant you shaped hole in it. I get being mad that they didn't tell you the truth, but you took your hurt to an unnecessary level and out in the wrong person, then basically gloated over it to your son. What did you expect him to do? Disown his daughter? I'm glad he loves better than you.

You are a giant pile of s**t! Thankfully your son is not.

Blood? What century are you living in? Shame on you.

You have known that child since she was born and loved her.Now you find out she's not 'blood" so you disown her!? You got exactly what you deserved .Now you can die alone, unloved and cut off. Cheers to your son!!

What you did was absolutely horrible.

You don't deserve to have grandkids because you are not acting like a HUMAN BEING! HELL, you could offer them $10,000,000.00 and you STILL WOULDN'T BE WORTHY OF BEING THEIR GRANDMOTHER.