A man, 53, has recently turned to Reddit to tell his family story and ask people for a piece of advice. His 15-year-old daughter is pregnant. And while many people might consider this a huge problem for their families, the man is not so much concerned about the pregnancy itself. He’s worried that now he’ll have to reveal a family secret to his daughter, which has been kept from her all her life, and he’s just desperate about how to do it in order not to do her any harm.
The man started his post with a shocking family fact from the past.
A 53-year-old dad turned to Reddit to ask people for a piece of advice in his tough family situation. He started his post, saying that he and his wife Rose, 53, had their older daughter Sarah, 31, when they were 22.
He explained how it all was for them, saying, «We were young and broke, but managed, and now we raised Sarah the best we could. She got pregnant at 15. It was a very depressing time for her, she had to go to therapy, and never told us anything about the father, which always upset her, so we never pushed the issue.»
The man goes on with his story, saying, that Sarah was very upset about her pregnancy. He says, «She originally wanted to terminate, but kept canceling, and eventually told us she wanted to give her up for adoption. But five months into the pregnancy, when she was discussing with a social worker for a couple to adopt, the couple dropped out of the adoption.»
The story took a very whimsical turn some time after.
The man continues his post, saying, «After trying to find more couples, Sarah asked us if we wanted to adopt. Rose and I were both 38 at this point, and we had both been discussing having another child, so we ended up adopting our daughter Ellie when Sarah had her at 16.»
Their family kept growing even more. The man wrote, «Two years after Ellie, my wife and I had our son Logan (13) biologically. Growing up, we always planned on telling Ellie she was adopted, but we knew with telling her that, we had to tell her Sarah was her bio mother.»
The relationship in the family was developing in a quite dramatic way.
But the relationship in the family was not an ordinary one. The man explained, «Sarah never became close with Ellie, not even as sisters. She moved out after the birth and lived with Rose’s sister. She has always shown her sisterly love to Logan, but never towards Ellie.
There has always been conflicting feelings with Sarah I have seen posts on Sarah’s Instagram where she posted a picture of what was supposed to be the five of us, but Ellie was cut out. I confronted her about this, and she says it’s too painful.
However, a couple years ago she showed up not very sober, begging us to let us see her ’daughter’. We talked to her and let her stay, but did not let her near Ellie since she was not in the proper condition. We found out from her husband she had suffered several miscarriages and was told to consider a surrogate.»
The man continues, saying, «She ended up doing that four years ago and has since had twins Jack and Jill (3M and F) who are biologically hers. Ellie has loved being an aunt to the twins and Sarah has encouraged this with Ellie, and has been inviting Ellie over her house for family time with Logan, who loves being an uncle. We have asked Sarah that in light of the twins, and Ellie being close to them, wouldn’t it be time to tell Ellie the truth, but Sarah keeps claiming she is not ready.»
Now the parents need to tell the truth to their daughter, at any cost.
Now the family is facing a huge dilemma.
The man wrote, «Recently, Ellie came to us and has told us she is pregnant. This time it is a completely different situation, we have met the father, he is a childhood friend of hers. We had the talk with Ellie long ago, as we did with Sarah. We approached the situation calmly and have since met with the father and his parents.
Ellie is insistent on keeping the baby. She is 3 months along. We have not told Sarah yet, we do not know how to approach the situation, we don’t know how she will be able to take it. My wife and I are considering telling Ellie the truth, but we need Sarah to be there.»
People of Reddit expressed their opinions, and supported the desperate man.
Reddit users were quite supportive of the dad, and gave him really good advice.
One person wrote, «She won’t necessarily get a DNA test. My dad’s 60 and still probably has half-siblings he doesn’t know about because they haven’t taken DNA tests. He just discovered his fifth half-sibling a few months ago. I myself have five half-siblings and one of them has never taken a DNA test, I only found out he existed because my mom asked me if my dad had told me about him.
I think it will probably still come out eventually, though, whether it be by DNA testing or otherwise. Better to tell Ellie alongside OP’s side of the story than have her find out later and probably feel betrayed because her adoptive parents knew all along and didn’t tell her.
She’ll probably be angry for a while, but I think when it comes to how she might interpret OP not telling her, it’s better to have ’We didn’t tell you because we didn’t want you to feel like your biological mother never loved you, and we hope that now that she’s reconnected with you somewhat, you can take this information and still know that all your family really does love you’ as the assumed reason than ’That was the case way back when, but after that we just put off telling you because ???’»
Another person said, «As a teen mom, I talked endlessly about being safe. ENDLESSLY. When I got remarried and had another child, my oldest was IN the delivery room. None of them repeated my choices (we never say mistakes because they are not mistakes). Sir, y’all need to have serious talks about being safe, getting them birth control, and now planning how to support your daughter. Because you are the common denominator in this situation.»
And another user wrote, «Sarah is irrelevant here. You are acting like you’re just looking after Ellie until Sarah wanted her back. You are Ellie’s parents. You’ve raised her and you both need to sit down with Ellie’s and ask what her plans are with school, raising the baby, finances for the baby.
You really need to step up here cos you’ve dropped the ball twice now.»
And here’s yet another family story, that’s twisted so much that it resembles a detective movie. Read more about a woman, whose husband did a paternity test on their daughter, and it came back negative, but the wife never cheated on him.
