25+ Times Women Opened Up About People Disrespecting Their Boundaries That Are Super Relatable

Girls stuff
year ago

It is our right to have the limits we set around our time, personal space, and energy to be respected. However, it’s common for people to break them. Because of that, one of the major challenges women face is figuring out what to do when someone violates their boundaries.

We at Bright Side know how frustrating it is when someone doesn’t seem to care about our wants and needs. To show you that you’re not alone, we are bringing women’s stories from a Reddit thread about all the times their boundaries weren’t taken seriously.

  • I don’t indulge in jealousy. If a partner is threatened by my having a life outside of them, it’s their job to work on that in therapy. I’m not giving up my friendships or giving them access to my phone, I’m amazed by how many people will allow this. epicpillowcase/reddit
  • When I get home from work, I need like 5 minutes to just decompress without being touched or having something shoved in my face. My job can be pretty stressful some days and my boyfriend is a very touchy person. I know he’s just showing he cares in his own love language, but it hurts my feelings that he takes it personally despite me bringing it up several times. LuckyLunaloo/reddit
  • I have been tickled so many times, even after I made it clear that I hate it and won’t be able to control any reaction. I’ve ended up punching them or hurting them out of pure panic and the inability to breathe, this only happens if they do not stop — and then they get angry at me?? I’m sorry I CANNOT BREATHE. dinop***atmyshoe/reddit
  • If you’re mad or upset, tell me why, and don’t pile your frustrations on until you explode and tell me everything at once. Please just communicate. WeakInformation6464/reddit
  • No comments about my body, I don’t want to hear what anyone thinks about my size, I don’t want to hear pet names, I don’t want to be belittled because of their own preconceived notions. p***nsugarcane/reddit
  • Please don’t post my picture online. I have a lot of acne. I do not want it. Posting pictures of people online when you know they don’t like it is very rude. Glittering-Pay-4882/reddit
  • Trying to pressure me into anything after I’ve already said no. I get very annoyed when people do that. SmallChallenge/reddit
  • I think long and hard about almost every single decision I make. I have a logical methodology and very real reasons for why I make the choices I do. I cannot stand when people try to make me change my mind and think what they want without understanding or asking why I even made my choice in the first place. leafypeep/reddit
  • If you want to spend time with me in person, I need some notice. Don’t text me 2 hours before noon and ask to do lunch. If I have to drive somewhere out of my way for a gathering, I need, at the very least, a week’s notice. Runnor2/reddit
  • Getting burnt out from work and not being able to say, “I can’t work an X amount of days, it’s too much” because I did not want to seem demanding. I was expected to work when I didn’t feel well, when I had the stomach flu, when I had too much school work, etc. knezevicm96/reddit
  • Do not pick me up off the ground. Ever. Yes, I’m short. Yes, you have big muscles. Just don’t. LemonFizzy0000/reddit
  • If I don’t immediately respond to a message, please don’t double or triple text me. I’ll respond when I want. I have a friend that does this, and it drives me up a wall. You aren’t entitled to my immediate attention, especially when the message is something trivial and not like trying to make plans or something. lsg1399/reddit
  • I don’t want to talk about my feelings. I am not a person that will talk about it outwardly with the whole friend group. I barely talk about it at all, it brings on a whole other level of uncomfy for me. For some reason, people in my life will push and push and push till I snap that I DO NOT want to talk about it. Alto_Goldfish_42/reddit
  • I need to have days or a few hours just to myself with no contact and no badgering me to go out. It helps me refresh and take a breath. tectonic121/reddit
  • Prioritizing work over human relationships. My friends/co-workers get mad about it because they think I’m overly focused on my work, and it’s always a hard no to parties. I don’t think they get how incredibly difficult it is (especially in developing and somewhat conservative nations) for women to achieve mobility and climb up the corporate ladder. argumentative-misfit/reddit
  • Work not respecting my vacation time or if I am sick — I simply do not respond. It is something they learn and have to deal with. Or if “friends” lie or are mean — to me or others — then I will not continue to hang around them. Ok_Computer1891/reddit
  • Showing up at my home unannounced. I hate it. I don’t know why. It makes me really uncomfortable. ThugBunnyy/reddit
  • I don’t want to drink, and I don’t want to sleep over at anyone else’s house.
    I also don’t want to get in the car with someone I perceive as a dangerous driver. TheTARDISRanAway/reddit
  • If I say, “No, I would like to not attend said work social,” respect my answer and move on. Do not poke your nose into my business. It doesn’t matter what I am and am not doing with my personal time after work, it’s time you’re not and never will be entitled to. Don’t tell me to rearrange my plans. Maybe I’m busy, maybe I’m not. Either way, I won’t be attending. Riin183/reddit
  • Actual personal space in the physical. Like, let me have a little bubble of breathing room. Spiritual_Lemonade/reddit
  • Not telling you every detail of my life. I’m a very private person, I have plenty of friends and siblings that I know would always lend an ear, but that doesn’t mean I have to tell you everything. I hate it when people say, “Oh, I didn’t know that, why didn’t you tell me?” Am I meant to call you every day and tell you everything that’s happened? noseychicken/reddit
  • I work from home. So yes, while I am at home during the day, no I will not hang out with you, no you cannot come around, and no I cannot watch your parcel until a courier comes to pick it up, I AM WORKING. Both my parents AND my neighbor just refuse to understand this concept. Humdedummy/reddit
  • Don’t touch my wig or eyebrows, and don’t point them out in public. I suffer from a hair loss disorder and get mega annoyed with this. KaibaGirl92/reddit
  • People don’t respect the value of silence. I’m a quiet person, and it’s perfectly okay to exist in the same space without talking. It doesn’t make you rude, but most people generally just like the conversation to chatter on and on. If you get silent for a bit, sometimes people get weirded out. Nova9xx/reddit
  • Physical contact — I always back away when people I don’t know, or know well, try to hug or otherwise touch me. Just don’t, for your own safety. Emptyplates/reddit
  • If you want to talk or ask about something, send a message, don’t call me, I hate calls... someone5133/reddit
  • Don’t lie to me. I’m not talking small lies out of kindness, like if my hair sucks. I mean lies that make me not trust you anymore. Once you’ve lied, I will likely never give you that trust back. TaintedPinkXoX/reddit
  • No hugs from random people. I don’t like hugs, except from people who are my friends, sister, or parents. I know, some people love to hug others, and I played along for a long time. But several men creeped me out by extending hugs for far too long. Ann3Nym/reddit
  • Do not touch me without my explicit permission. So many men expect hugs when I see them. Even if I haven’t seen them in years, or I’m not close with them. One day it clicked, I realized I could refuse. That it’s my body and no one was entitled to any part of it. LiterallyCasey / Reddit

Do you have boundaries that are important to you? How do you deal with people who don’t respect them?

Preview photo credit LuckyLunaloo / Reddit


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