8 Love Lessons From People Who Remarried Their Ex-Spouses
Most people who get divorced stay divorced. However, there are some lucky couples that give their love a second chance and end up staying together for good. In the process, they learn something new about themselves and about how to build a lasting relationship with someone.
We at Bright Side think that the stories about people who remarried their exes can teach us a thing or 2 about love. And we hope you enjoy them as well!
1. The grass isn’t greener on the other side.
“My wife and I were married 17 years, and somewhere around the age of 40, both of us began to question our future together. So I filed for divorce. Our 2 families got divorced along with us. Everyone used to talk and get together and even planned to do so after we dropped the D bomb. It just didn’t work out that way. Bitter relationships formed.
Fast forward 3 years and after no contact with my ex, I get a call from her saying that our pet that we shared was dying. I go to see her and we end up talking. We realized that the grass is not greener on the other side and that we were seeking something that was right in front of us all along. We took it very slowly, meeting again over the next few months. We are happier now than ever.” TheToenailCollector / Reddit
2. Work on your emotional maturity.
“We had several problems all at once, from money to illness. We ended up hating each other, and we divorced amicably. For 3 years we would sporadically talk on Christmas or birthdays, but it would always end up in an argument. Eventually, we stopped contact.
A few years later she messaged me about a mutual friend, and we agreed to meet up. Everything went well, and we saw each other more often and started a relationship. We talked over our old issues and both realized that we had improved in the areas we previously struggled with — also, that we were now much more emotionally mature. We got remarried in secret.” horrorhiker / Reddit
3. You don’t need to be together 24/7.
“My dad and my step-mom divorced and went a few years where they barely spoke to each other. After my brother went to college, my dad started doing the home repairs
After my sister went to college, he started staying over more often. Whenever they’d have an argument, he’d go back to his house and give her time to simmer down. After being divorced for over 20 years, they decided it was stupid to have 2 separate houses, so they officially got back together and bought a new house. They keep separate bedrooms so if they have an argument, they can get away and let things cool off.” fordprecept / Reddit
4. It’s worth making an extra effort.
“My wife divorced me after we had been together for 4 years, citing lack of attention, understanding, etc. She also had issues with self-esteem, and severe depression stemming from her childhood. I was a full-time pre-med student with 2 part-time jobs. She dated around for a little less than a year then told me that she wanted me back.
She’s seeing a psychiatrist to try and find a medication that works for her. I’m down to one full-time job and my last year in undergrad. I’ve also learned to try and take more time just for her. Learned to avoid living only to work, started to schedule dates, and began to just hang out with her more often. Hopefully, everything continues to be smooth sailing because I love that woman more than life itself.” xSurelockHomesx / Reddit
5. Sometimes you need to wait for the right time to be together.
“My husband and I didn’t take anything too seriously until our son was conceived. I put my big girl panties on, and he reluctantly followed suit. He resented our lives for a number of years after our wedding. Our second son came along and the tension grew more. We called it quits after 6 years together. The schematics of the kids was painful, so in the end they stayed with me. He came around when he could emotionally deal with it all.
Then one day my car broke down. I called him and he came right over to help. I ended up inviting him in for dinner. He stayed, and we were finally able to realize it was both of us resenting each other. 19, pregnant, and married — we had no clue about life. We gave it another go and here we are almost 13 years later — we couldn’t be happier. Sometimes people just need to breathe and grow before making the right decisions...” mclovin8186 / Reddit
6. It’s never too late.
“My grandfather always valued work over his family, he was hardly there when his 5 kids were growing up. In the end, he and his wife divorced. When he retired (he basically never really did retire and still spent hours helping clients), they got back together as they needed and loved each other again. They remarried at the age of 86 and 89.” matsdebats / Reddit
7. Give each other space.
“My mom and dad split when they were young with 2 kids and incredibly broke. It was a really rough divorce, especially for us kids. They were separated for 3 years or so. Some years passed — their rebounds came and went.
They both got stable jobs and started seeing each other more. When I was 9, they decided to rent a house. One year later, they found out they were pregnant with my little sister. They got remarried about a year after my little sister was born. That was 21 years ago. They are one of the happiest couples I’ve ever been around. Sometimes space and refocus are all you need!” ***withhaptitude / Reddit
8. If your love is special, nothing else matters.
“My first husband and I married pretty young after college. We were generally happy, but it seemed like our lives were moving in different directions. We split up. We dated other people but without the sense of destiny and certainty that we had with one another.
Over a decade after breaking it off, we got back together and have never been happier. Now we have the life experience to know that what we have is irreplaceably special. The stupid small things that seemed problematic back then, we now know to be non-issues. We’re so, so lucky.” throwitfaaaaaraway12 / Reddit
Do you know anyone who got divorced and then remarried the same person? Did it work out for them?