10+ Kids Who Learned the Hard Way That Parents Miss Nothing

Kids are notoriously creative when it comes to sneaking around — whether it’s smuggling candy, hiding bad grades, or pulling off a “harmless” prank. But as much as they think they’re masterminds, parents usually catch on fast.

• Every night, my 9-year-old talks in her sleep, or at least I thought she did. Last night, I got up to use the bathroom and heard her window open. I stopped and listened. She was sitting on the edge of her bed, quietly talking to someone outside. She didn’t seem scared. Then, I noticed a small cat sitting on the windowsill, listening intently. He was filthy and super skinny, so I could instantly tell he was a stray. The next day, I “accidentally” bought a bag of cat food. Now she sneaks a handful of food into her room every night, and the kitty is extremely grateful for it.

• My 4yo daughter thinks I don’t know she’s “stealing” broccoli florets to eat raw. She also apparently thinks it regrows in the fridge. © LarpLady / Reddit

• My daughter thinks I don’t know that she’s watching YouTube shorts on the TV because she’s closed the living room door. Living room door closed = YouTube shorts being watched.
  © jnthhk / Reddit

• When one of my gremlins steals a snack from the cupboard, they always steal three and give the other two to their siblings. They don’t do it often, and 95% of the time, ask anyway. Though my middle gremlin will usually pull me aside to whisper to me not to tell dad and asks if I can eat it too (I have dietary requirements), I know when I’m being offered secret snacks their dad said no.
  © PainEn_Pa*** / Reddit

• My poor sweet kindergartener confessed with tears in his eyes that his imaginary friend wasn’t real. That he’d never been real. That he’d been lying. I had a hard time keeping a straight face as he poured his heart out about the guilt that had been eating him alive for being a “lying liar who lied to his mom.” Then I hugged him and fessed up that I knew. © Tra***yP***FamilyVid / Reddit

• My 18-month-old thinks he’s fooling us when we tell him to eat some of his food, and he puts it up to his mouth and then slyly drops it. © TheRealOcsiban / Reddit
  

• They read for an hour or two after lights out. They think that I don’t know and they are being sneaky. I am surprised that they haven’t figured out that their flashlight hasn’t run out of batteries in the last three years. © Unknown author / Reddit

• I know that my kid thinks he got all mine (his father’s) and his mother’s social media accounts including my other Reddit under his watch, I know he spies on me, but he doesn’t know that I know he is spying on me, basically, I’m spying on a little spy. © calebryu / Reddit

• He compulsively rips his socks, discreetly throws them out and steals dad’s socks. He has no socks left. Dad is running low. I’m always buying socks! But we just don’t talk about it.
  © laurenovich / Reddit

• The cookie disappears during the night. We have a camera in the kitchen. I know which child it is, the only one old enough to reach without making noise. If he asked he could have some extra, however, I’m comfortable letting him think he’s getting away with something so he doesn’t get better at sneaking. © licensed2cut / Reddit

• I kept finding empty chip bags and candy wrappers stuffed behind the couch cushions. At first, I assumed it was my husband sneaking midnight snacks — until the wrappers started showing up in my son’s backpack, sock drawer, and even under his bed. When I asked my 7-year-old about it, he looked me dead in the eyes and said, “It must be raccoons.” A few days later, I found a hand-drawn “WANTED” poster taped to the fridge. It featured a cartoon raccoon wearing a ski mask with the caption: “NOT ME — PROBABLY DAD.” He was so committed to the lie, he even set a fake “raccoon trap” made of a cardboard box and cereal.

• My 7-year-old kept whispering under her bed every night. I assumed she was playing with toys or talking to herself, until one morning I found a pillow and two juice boxes crammed under there. When I finally checked while she was at school, I found that she had placed one of our old photo frames under there, the one with a picture of my dad who passed away last year. Around it, she’d arranged little objects: a bracelet, a toy car, one of her drawings. When I asked her about it, she looked surprised I didn’t already know. “He gets scared alone,” she said. “So I read to him at night.”

While these kids gave it their best shot, their failed attempts at secrecy were no match for sharp-eyed parents and some good old-fashioned common sense.